The Becoming
by Zariha321
Summary: "Fate had a funny way of trying to prove to me that it existed. That it, along with destiny, ruled my life in a way that I refused to acknowledge." Tobias started his life under the rule of an evil father but when Max offers him a new life, Tobias has no idea what he is in for. After 100 years of life, will Tobias finally find a reason for his existence?
1. The Becoming

Chapter 1

New Orleans - 1791

The man stumbled through the empty streets of the old square, having been thrown from yet another smelly brothel.

By all accounts he was a wealthy man with little responsibility, but in reality he was a man who had little in his life. He laughed at himself as he stumbled along, knowing that if his father saw him like this, he would be furious. His father was a prominent plantation owner known for his brutality. Vindictive is what he was, expecting perfection from everyone around him. The man often wondered why he stayed in his father's home; surely he could find some way to escape. An adult of twenty-two years, he could have his own land and his own livelihood, yet he remained under his father's thumb. The one time he had tried to assert himself, his father rode him down and took him back at gun point. The fear he felt when he caught him rendered him helpless.

Remembering back to that day, his father's words and actions echoed through his memory. "My son," his father had growled, musket pressed against the hollow of his neck and his back pressed into the rough bark of a tree. "You are mine! And you will do as you are told until I am dead in the ground, or I'll see you buried before me. Understand?"

In many ways he was as much a slave to his father's will as those who tended the plantation. He would be what his father wanted, no matter the price. Although it was true he could leave to enjoy the nightlife of New Orleans, he knew if he tried to escape farther than that, his father would put a bounty on his head greater than any price paid for the return of a slave. The North did not offer the same assurances for the safety of a white man as it did the smallest black child.

He staggered down the street, toward the next pub that could give him the solace of alcohol to ease his troubled mind. Stumbling, he tried to right himself by reaching out for the closest object. It was only when he crashed his unusually large muscular build into that of an unwitting woman that he saw clearly for a moment. In his drunken stupor, he forced them both to lose their balance and topple to the ground. She cursed in French as the drunken man found himself lying face first in the mud.

"You stupid idiot," the woman shouted in a barely understandable French accent at the man now lying in the mud. In spite of the man's exceptional good looks and his obvious stature, the woman growled out her insult. She stood scowling at the man as she stood to leave, muttering insults in French.

"Foul wench," he grumbled pulling himself out of the mud. He brushed at the gunk on his clothes, with little use. But instead of caring, he righted himself as best he could and continued down the street to find another pub to drown the echoes in his head.

Tonight wasn't any usual night of drinking for the man. It was the anniversary of his mother's murder. He hated that he wasn't able to save her and he felt it was his fault. So he used women and liquor to drown out his pain. The women in the pubs were more than willing to take away his pain with their bodies. He was a handsome man with long brown hair and extraordinary blue eyes. His apparent wealth and good looks made him a prize husband for any one of them.

He continued to wander through the filthy streets avoiding all of those places that reminded him of what he was supposed to be. He refused to go to the pubs that land owners typically frequented. He didn't want to see the men that his father pretended were his friends. He didn't want to be part of that life. So he slunk in the darkest recesses of the town square in order to hide from the people that would tell his father of his exploits. When he found himself in an unfamiliar part of town, he let out a sigh of relief. It was a place that he didn't frequent, so it was unlikely that he would encounter anyone who could cause him trouble with his father. He found an unassuming pub in a dark corner of a dead end street and stumbled inside. This pub was darker and dirtier than most, regardless the man saddled up at the bar and ordered a glass of whisky.

"Do you think it smart to continue to drink tonight?" a stranger asked from a few seats away.

"'S none of your concern," the man growled at the intruder.

"My apologies," the stranger said with a strong French accent. "You just seem as though you've been out for a while tonight."

The man smirked at the stranger who showed signs of wealth that glittered strangely in a place consisting of dirt and vermin. The man knew that he fit in a place like this at the moment, much more than the stranger did. With mud caked all over his clothes, the man looked like any other vagrant. But this stranger looked far more sophisticated.

"I've been around a bit this evening," the man mumbled loud enough for the stranger to hear. He tried to be cold and indifferent toward the man. All he really wanted was for the alcohol to take hold and to allow the silence and despair to envelop him just a little while longer. He needed to be able to go home and handle his father's irrational moods.

"I am Eric, by the way. I live just north of here, but am checking out the Mississippi Valley. I think it is time for a change of scenery," he said through his Spanish accent.

"Well sir, I believe you have chosen a questionable part of Louisiana. There are much more prominent areas."

"This area is just fine," Eric said. "And you are?"

Sighing loud enough so that the stranger knew of his annoyance, the man resigned himself to the conversation. No matter how much he wanted, he couldn't be blatantly rude. "I'm Tobias. My father owns a plantation just south of here in Destrehan."

"The son of a plantation owner, I think I found you in a questionable area as well then," Eric acknowledged.

Tobias looked at the strange man sitting near him. He had a peculiar porcelain quality to his unusually perfect skin and brown hair that was long and flowing. This man had an ancient aura about him. Tobias wasn't sure why this man who looked to be only a few years older seemed as though he belonged in another time and place.

It's probably the whisky, Tobias thought focusing on the drink in front of him. Then draining the glass in one long swallow, he acknowledged the man's presence once more and nodded.

"Well sir, it was nice to meet you however I must be going. My father doesn't look kindly on my drunkenness so I must arrive home before he awakens."

Eric nodded his head toward Tobias, "Maybe we shall meet again."

Tobias bowed and quickly removed himself to the streets of the square.

~oOo~

Tobias's POV

When I arrived home, there were already lanterns lit in the front of the house. Knowing that my father must be awake, I took a deep breath of the crisp early morning air and grudgingly entered the home of my tormentor.

"Where the hell have you been?" my father shouted from in front of the fireplace as I entered the room.

"I'm sorry father, I was in the square. On business."

"You were getting drunk. I can smell the whisky on you, you insolent fool." Knowing better than to argue with this man, I still felt the anger building in my chest. I hated him with every fiber of my being. If I thought I could get away with it, I would have murdered him in his sleep. But then one of the slaves that worked the land would end up being blamed and put to death for my misdeeds and that was not an acceptable consequence. Already a slave was hanged when they found my mother brutally beaten to death. In spite of my pleas that it was my father, no one believed me so Mary, our elderly house servant, was put to death.

Shaking my head, I attempted to clear the cobwebs that had formed in my mind from my evening of drinking. I needed to try to appease him, at least until I could get the hell away from him. "I'm sorry father," I repeated, still not being very convincing. My thoughts and feelings for this man betrayed my seemingly pensive front.

"Come. Here," my father growled at me.

I approached the man cautiously, preparing myself. He was not a small man by any means, only slightly thinner and shorter than me. He could very well pass for a man twenty years his junior, and his anger made him capable of things not many men could be. My father quickly grabbed me by the throat and thrust me against the wall. He was a deceivingly fast and powerful man and as much as it pained me think of it, the only way I could ever come out the winner of a battle against him would be if I allowed the anger to take me over. That was a feeling that I couldn't relent to. I was scared to death that if I allowed the fury to fuel me, that I would turn into him. Never, I will never let that happen.

"I will not have the heir to my fortune disrespecting me by spending his time among the dregs of society."

Out of the corner of my eye I could see him slowly and carefully pull the iron that he was using to stoke the fire from the flames. Bringing the white hot end toward my face and showing it to me, he snarled, my fear fueling his hatred. "I could destroy the handsome face that the socialites have come to love and admire. Then where would you be? Nothing but a pathetic piece of shit," he growled. He brought the white hot poker was dangerously close now, the heat already touching my face in warning.

Then he quickly moved the poker and jabbed it into my side. I swallowed the screams that threatened to erupt from within me as the metal burned through my clothes and deep into my skin. He released my throat and I dropped to the floor, clutching at my ravaged ribcage.

"You're pathetic. Get that looked at by Marguerite," my father commanded me. "And do not go against me again."

I glared toward the man and in that moment, when he was granting me the reprieve that he had never showed my mother, I knew that if I ever had a chance to hurt this man, I would. I would watch him burn for his sins.

Clutching my side, I made my way into the kitchen where Marguerite stood by the counter with herbs and other medicinal items, waiting to fix whatever damage my father had inflicted. The unfortunate thing was, her witchcraft would never be enough. She would never have the right herbs or potions to fix the real damage my father had inflicted on me.

"Master Tobias, when you will learn to mind to your father?" she asked me.

"Not even when he's dead in the ground," I growled.

"It's pretty bad, Master," she said, gesturing to my side with a wet towel she'd apparently been twisting around her fingers while she waited for me to arrive.

"Just cover it over, Marguerite." I told her. "And do not refer to me as master. I am not your master, Marguerite." The sadness in her beautiful brown eyes brought me out of my anger. Not thinking about the consequences, I pulled her to me. This action could get us both killed, but since when had that stopped me? She was beautiful, kind, and most of all right in front of me. Call it convenience, call it whatever you like, but she was there and I wanted her in my arms, in my bed.

Her honey brown skin was warm and inviting and her long black hair, that I had only seen a few times, was hidden beneath the wrap surrounding her head. She was a beautiful woman with a kind and warm soul. A woman who I could easily love, that I have loved since childhood, but alas it was not to happen. "I'll live, my love," I whispered and press my lips to hers.

Her eyes darted to the door, "We cannot, Master. If your father finds us."

I didn't say a word, I simply pulled her from the kitchen toward the room that she called her own. I had always had strong feelings for Marguerite, even since we were children. Her mother, Mary, was our house slave and my caregiver growing up, so Marguerite and I grew up together. But my love for Marguerite was never the love of a brother to a sister, but of a man to a woman. I could feel the kindness in her soul and the purity of her heart and that was what I loved. It was time that I let this raven haired beauty know my feelings for her, regardless of the consequences. When we entered her room, she had a look of terror in her eyes.

"What is wrong my love?"

"We cannot," she whispered. "Your father…" her voice faded off, she focused on something that no one else could see.

"My father what?" I growled at her. I didn't want to frighten her, but I had a feeling that I knew exactly what was going on.

She didn't say a word, but she didn't have to. My fears were acknowledged when I looked into her warm whisky colored eyes, and saw the tears form. That wretched man! He'd forced himself on her, claiming her. A crime he could be hanged for, but the servants and especially Marguerite would never say a word against him out of fear. He had taken my mother, then Mary, and now Marguerite.

Suddenly, I saw nothing but red as I pushed out of her room and through the house. I no longer cared for his punishments, I only cared about revenge. She was all I'd ever loved other than her mother and my own. She was the only thing that kept me sane when my father was doing everything he could to destroy my life and he took her from me. I couldn't allow him to continue to destroy lives, especially hers. I stormed through the house toward the library to confront the evil man. But Marguerite followed close behind and pulled me into an empty room.

"What do you want Marguerite?" I demanded. Didn't she know that she had broken me with her rejection? Didn't she understand that he had destroyed everything that I ever loved?

"Please, Tobias, please don't. I am fine. He cares for me. Please…" her barely understandable English and her expressive face pled for me to listen to her and stop. I slid my fingers across her perfect cheek, across her lips, and down her throat. I took in everything that was Marguerite, the woman that I wanted but couldn't ever have. I let out a sigh and focused on her pleading eyes. Eventually, I bowed my head in submission. "As you wish mon ami. I will retire for the day. Please wake me later."

I tromped to my room wanting nothing more than to rid my world of the bane of my existence. But I realized that first, I would have to find a way.

~oOo~

I woke hours later to see the sun setting in the sky. The blues, purples, pinks, and oranges of the autumn sunset brought me only the smallest joy as they reminded me of the times I spent with my mother, enjoying the crisp evening air and taking in the beauty before us. Now even the most vivid sky seemed colorless without her.

I walked into the dining room to find my father sitting and eating alone. Marguerite was standing like a sentry in the corner waiting to tend to my father's slightest whim. I knew the circumstances weren't her fault, but I couldn't help feeling the deep hurt of her rejection. I knew the affair would have been wrong and could have caused us both harm because in that day just after the Revolution, the mixing of races was not only considered wrong, it was illegal. But I really didn't care about legalities, I wanted her.

"Nice of you to join me, Tobias," my father said in a low grumble.

"I'm not joining you, I'm going out," I growled from deep in my throat. In the corner I could see Marguerite flinch at the sound of my voice. Anger and spite filled my heart and my blood turned to fire. His arrogance would be his undoing, I was sure of it. My father didn't make a move or say a word. He continued to eat without any further acknowledgment of my presence. When I turned to leave and just before I was out of the dining room he spoke.

"You are no longer welcome in this home. If you want to continue with your ruinous behavior you will do it without my money."

"I don't need your money," I snapped. The fact was, we both knew I had nothing on my own. He made sure I was reliant on him so he could control me. But I was done with it all. I would rather live in squalor than spend another day as his son.

I barged out of the house and into the chilled autumn night. Furious, I made my way back to the pubs to try to get my mind off of the situation in my father's house. I needed to find a room for a few nights and begin to figure out my next move.

The area was teaming with pub-crawlers out enjoying the coolness of the night. Laughter and talking filled the streets and every building that I passed. I searched out the pub that I fell into last night. I didn't desire the attention of women or the comradery that one had with others saddled up on barstools waiting for their next drink. I wanted the desolate and dark seclusion that I found when I entered the rundown tavern. I didn't know if I would ever find peace, but the desolate pub that I found last night seemed most likely to provide me with the seclusion I needed. Something about it called to me, I felt in my gut that I belonged there. I just didn't understand why. I entered the dank bar that I found to be so serene last night and plopped onto as stool. It was unchanged from the night before, dark and destitute in spite of the setting sun outside. It was private, quiet, and none of the women that frequented the brothels would bother going into such a place.

Without even asking, the barkeep slid a whisky in front of me. Taking a deep breath, I gathered in the aroma of peat and smoke from the whisky, the smell of saw dust on the floor, and the dense smell of smoke from cigars hanging in the air. The bartender occupied himself with the other patrons but there weren't many bodies to keep him busy for long. But he managed to busy himself for long enough. He didn't return in front of me until my glass was empty.

When he moved back toward where I sat to refill my quickly emptied glass I stopped him for a moment. "Do you have a room for rent?" I asked brusquely.

"Sure, I have a room," he said. He moved to the other side of the bar and rummaged around in a drawer. When he returned he brought a key. "Upstairs, second door on the right. I ask five dollars a night."

I shoved my hand in my coat pocket and took out money that I made sure to take from my father's safe before leaving the house. I handed the man twenty-five dollars. "I'll take it for five nights."

He looked at me, quickly taking the money from my grasp without a word. He refilled my whisky once more before moving back to the other patrons.

"Back again," said a familiar voice. His voice was low, smooth and calming. It washed over me like warm summer rain and made me feel safe. It was like the sound of his voice spoke more than the actual words that he was saying. I remembered that voice from our brief conversation the night before and the same feeling of calm and peace found me once again. It surprised me that a man of such obvious stature seemed to frequent a place like this, but his comforting presence washed over me and pacified me.

I didn't understand the feeling that his voice provoked in me and I wanted it to stop. His presence annoyed me and his presumptuousness angered me. I didn't want to interact with others, and I didn't want to be calmed by his voice. I wanted to be left alone to seethe. I wanted to think about my father and all that he has taken from me. I thought of the wound in my ribs, just another scar that marks my body from his constant abuse. Anger built in me, washing through me, over me until the calm left me completely.

All of this happened in a matter of moments. His voice calming while his presence infuriating.

"Well, I'm staying here, so I suppose I'll be around," I said with a growing annoyance. I had no reason to behave like that with this man. He did nothing to me that should make me angry. But anger radiated from me, I felt it in the air and all around. Anger, hatred, fury, and destruction ran through my blood and fueled me. This feeling that settled in my gut once again and I fed off of it. Would I become that man so quickly? That man who allowed his emotions to affect him in such a manner?

"Tell me, what causes a man such as yourself to room in a place like this?"

"What causes a man of such stature, such as yourself, to frequent a place like this?" I growled in return.

He let out a hearty laugh at my obvious annoyance. "The stature of a man cannot be determined by clothing. I'm sure you can name men that have acquired high stature in the eyes of other men, but are still the scum of the earth."

"I can indeed, stranger. What is your name again?" My annoyance dissipated slightly the more I listened to his calming voice.

"Eric. Tell me about this man to which you refer."

I didn't know what compelled me to speak to this man, but I found myself telling Eric about my father, my mother's murder, the abuse I'd endured, and my disownment. I found myself telling this man more than I've ever told another soul. It was almost as though he coaxed it out of me without my even knowing he was doing it. His voice spoke to me beyond the words that he spoke. The earlier anger relaxed, like a taut muscle suddenly coming loose. It was both liberating and terrifying at the same time.

"Sounds to me that you should be the one to disown him," Eric said. "What if I told you that I could show you a whole new world where the sins of your father could be avenged? What if I told you that I could show you a world that you would never have to endure the pain of abuse again?"

"I'd say you're crazy. And what would make you want to show me such a world anyway? You don't even know me."

Eric seemed to ponder my questions before he leaned in close, "Because I've been seeking a companion for quite some time, Tobias."

I looked at him in shock, "Sorry Eric, but I'm not seeking that sort of companionship from a man."

Eric let out a chuckle. "No Tobias, you misunderstand. I'm seeking a," be paused for a moment, "business partner. Not a partner for the bed."

"What sort of business?" I asked. I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't the slightest bit interested in what this strange man has to say. He was so well spoken, I imagined he could charm any woman into his bed, or any man for that matter.

"It is not something that I prefer to advertise. If you come with me, I could show you."

I nodded, simply. After all, my situation being what it was, I couldn't refuse an honest offer of employment, and I would be lying if I said I wasn't curious. His soft, soothing voice entranced me.

I finished my whisky in one large gulp and followed the man dressed all in black out of the pub and into the cool night. We walked for some time in silence and before I realized where we were, we were standing in front of my father's home.

"I know what this man did to you last night. I can take away the pain that he inflicted. I can make your body heal and become unblemished from your father's punishments. I can also help you to dispose of your father so he would never be able to return. I only ask one thing in return. You allow me to live in this house with you and we become partners."

"What? How?" I asked, confused about what he was offering.

"Tobias, take my hand," he commanded. He reached out his long thin fingers that were topped with dagger like nails at the end of each digit. "I can give you eternity, I can give you the chance for a life without pain, without illness, without fear. I can be your friend, your mentor, your companion. All I asked is your loyalty to me."

Without a word, without fear, I nodded my head. Before I knew what's happening Eric had me in his grasp and before I passed out, I realized that he'd sunk his teeth into my neck.


	2. The Devil

Chapter 2

The Devil

I awakened to the sound of silence. Looking around, I found that I was in my bed in my father's house: the same desk, the same chair pressed against it. I wondered if the events of last evening were nothing but a vivid dream. Nothing but a dream. What if what I was so sure that I remembered about the tavern, the stranger, and the deal were nothing but the ravings of my fevered mind? Had my father's torture made me delirious?

I grabbed at my neck, feeling the rawness of an exposed wound. It could be the pain from another burn from my father, maybe I just didn't remember his latest punishment.

It wouldn't have been the first time that I passed out when he decided to destroy my body with one of his punishments. But this was different, I didn't feel sore from a beating, I felt exhausted. My body was heavy, too heavy to move. I tried desperately to sit up so that I could figure out what was happening but I barely had enough strength to breathe. Nausea and dizziness overwhelmed me as I attempted to move just from trying to lift my head. I slumped back down into the softness of the mattress, suddenly wishing for death to take me. From across the room I noticed a presence, a sound from within the shadows.

"The deed is almost done. I've drained you almost to death. If I leave you now, you will die within hours, maybe less. However if you say the word, I can provide you with new life."

I tried to sit up again and see the face that was attached to the voice, even though I was sure I knew the voice to belong to Eric. He came over to me and placed his hand on my shoulder and pushed me down into the mattress with little effort. My strength and power gone, I'd never felt so weak and powerless. The feeling of weakness angered me, made me want to fight back, to go after this man. My anger and frustration almost blocked out his words. He said he drained me, but… "Drained me of what?" I croaked out in a whisper.

"Blood of course. I ask you now, do you want my gift? Do you want death or eternal life?" Confusion took over as my muddled thoughts and invaded my mind with fear and worry. Then he moved into the light and I gasped at his sight. His coloring was not as porcelain and pale has it had been, his skin was flushed with color, his teeth protruding from his mouth showing his enlarged canine teeth stained with blood. His eyes were what troubled me the most, last I saw him his eyes were a deep dark brown, now they were pale blue. "Tobias, you'll never grow old and you'll never die. You will be stronger than any mortal man could ever imagine. Join me and we shall live like kings among men."

"What of love, of the future? I don't wish to wander an eternity without a purpose," I whispered. I wasn't sure why I was arguing, I could feel my heart stuttering, I was dying.

"Love," he scoffed. "You can love hundreds of times over in your lifetime. You can find new love with every century, several new loves even. What say you? Do you wish death or life? The time has come to choose your future."

Without looking at the man, I nestled further into my bed trying desperately to weigh the pros and cons with little success. My mind was a jumble of the past, present, and future. The fading thoughts of a dying man. Then the realization that I did not wish for death filled me with fear and longing for health and life. I didn't want to die, not like this, not at such a young age. I could stop this. "I choose life," I told him through gritted teeth. The pain of death taking over my body, I could feel my organs beginning to fail me.

He quickly and wordlessly swooped in and took me. He pressed his dagger-like nails into his skin and drew blood. Pressing the open wound to my mouth, he encouraged me to drink.

"You must drink my son or death will take you. Drink and choose life."

Instincts took over my body and I began to taste the blood that he offered of his own veins. I drained him as much as he allowed and when he pulled away from me his skin had lost its luster, his eyes returned to their original brown. And just when I started to feel some strength again, the pain and trembling began.

My body was writhing, spasms overtaking me. Pain seizing my body, screaming for the end to take me. He said he would give me life, instead I could feel my body dying. The beating of my heart stuttering and stopping, then restarting and fluttering at an unnatural speed. My brain in a fog, all of my faculties released, forcing all of the normal humanly functions to expel themselves from my body. The stranger didn't grant me life, he brought my death to me. I let out a strangled moan as I felt my lungs seize as my last breath expelled from my body. But then I breathed in once more, taking in all the smells that surrounded us.

"It is normal," Eric said calmly. "Your mortal body is dying, it will be replaced by your immortal body. Your senses will be enhanced, you will no longer need food or water. The needs of humanity will no longer rule your life."

My body writhed in pain, like a thousand white hot pokers sticking into my skin and ripping out my insides. My mind was a jumble with thoughts of death and dying, pain and anguish. Nothing made sense but then everything made sense. I didn't know how I would make it through… then suddenly everything stopped. The pain, the jumbled thoughts, the fear, and anguish all gone faster than they came on me. Suddenly I could hear the heartbeat of someone that was not in this room, I could hear their breathing. I could hear the rustling of birds in the trees outside, the soft scamper of a field mouse that had made its way into the house. All of these sounds assaulted me as I tried to move my limbs. I could feel the strength and power within me. I'd never felt such might within my body before. I could smell the presence of people in the house, I could distinguish between my father and the slaves. Their smell pulled at me, their thoughts called to me.

"Not only are you stronger than you've ever been, you are faster and can smell and hear your victims before they are even aware of your presence," he explained. "You are a predator. A hunter. A killer. You must hunt and kill to survive. You must drain the blood of your victims. You will be swift, you will be beautiful." Eric continued, "Now as for your father…"

"I would have thought you would have gotten rid of him."

"No, that is not for me. In order for you to truly free yourself from the bane of your existence, you must be the one to choose life or death for him."

I quickly stood and looked at Eric, "Is it his heartbeat that I can hear drumming him my head and his sweat and putridness that fills my senses?"

"I believe so," he affirmed. "You should be able to sense your prey, smell them. We all have different strengths and weaknesses. You will discover yours soon enough. Do you hear his heartbeat?"

"I do."

I stalked out of the bedroom, feeling every movement of air around me, hearing every creek and noise that the house made. My footsteps lighter than they ever were in life, the treading of a predator tracking its prey. I entered the room of my father, he sat at his desk looking over some sort of paperwork. When he looked up at me he scowled, a deep disapproving look of loathing.

"Come back to beg for forgiveness? In order for forgiveness to occur, Tobias, you will have to suffer greatly."

"I will no longer suffer at your hand, Father. It is you who shall suffer for the last moments of your life."

He snickered at my words, causing me to feel the full capability within my newly transformed body. He stood before me as though he was going to punish me for my insolence, but when he lunged, what I once thought to be fast seemed like slow motion. His movements were jerky and slow compared to what I had become, the ultimate predator. Before he reached me, I had him in my clutches and my newly formed teeth were sunk into his rough skin. The taste of his skin on my tongue was bitter and salty, when his blood filled my mouth, it tasted of the sweetness of the beef and wine that he had for dinner. He barely struggled beneath my toxic kiss as I drained him of the life that his blood provided him.

I pulled back from him before he was dead and looked into his putrid blue eyes that matched my own. I once thought this man was powerful. The king of his house, he ruled it with an iron fist. Everyone in his wake felt his presence. Now all I felt was a weak old man under my grasp. I felt nothing for this man who had made my life and my world hell for as long as I could remember. Before I would allow death to take him, I spoke to him.

"You once told me I wasn't man enough to be on my own. You told me I was nothing, shit under your boot. And I believed you. I allowed you to control me. You said I'd never amount to anything. Well, you were wrong. You see, father? I have made something of myself after all," I snarled. Then I flashed my teeth, my eyes boring into his. I heard his thoughts, his frantic fears overwhelming his mind. He feared me. Finally, he feared me. And I once again sunk my teeth deep into his jugular.

When he was drained into death, I laid his corpse onto the bed where he appeared as though he was sleeping. The puncture holes in his neck the only indication of any wrongdoing. I turned to find Eric standing in the shadows, "Very well done. Very efficient. You are a natural predator. Now look at yourself in the mirror and tell me what you see."

I looked at myself and the first thing I noticed was the color of my usually dark blue eyes. They were now the same shade of blue that Eric's were upon drinking my blood. "Your eyes will change when you hunt and drink. It is what allows vampires to see beyond normal human sight. It gives us the ability to see and stalk our prey with efficiency. It is the only indication that a human could have to identify us as anything less than normal."

"Can we sense others like us?"

"You could hear the heartbeat of your father? You can probably hear the heartbeat of the slave that is currently working in the kitchen, but can you hear my heartbeat?"

I listened intently and realized that I heard nothing of him in this room. Aside from being able to see him there, I heard nothing coming from his body. "No, I hear nothing."

"That is because we no longer have a normal human heartbeat. The heart works and the blood does indeed get pumped throughout our bodies, but the heart and organs work in other ways to make that happen. I'm not an expert on exactly how and why our bodies work, but they do. As far as sensing others like us, it is possible but a rare gift. Most of us do not seek each other out. When we make companions, we travel together until it is no longer beneficial, then we go through the process of making another. There are covens of vampires in places around the world, but I haven't come across any personally."

I stared at my image in the mirror. I looked the same, however I also looked very different from the man that I was just hours ago. The threat of my father gone and the future of possibility looming, I could do anything.

"The sun will be rising soon, Tobias. We must find sleep for the day. We cannot go out into the sun. There are few things that can bring the demise of a vampire, but the sun, silver, decapitation, and fire. Beyond these four things, there is little that will harm us."

"What about wooden stakes, I always heard…"

"That is Russian folklore. No such wood exists that would be strong enough to penetrate through the chest and kill a vampire. Now a silver stake or any form of silver that can penetrate into the body will kill the vampire. Actually if we even touch or handle silver in any way, it will burn our skin."

"Like the werewolf?"

"Silver has powerful attributes within that react with the supernatural body causing damage and death. The sun is deadly because it causes our skin to burn although I have heard of extremely strong vampires that can withstand the sun for periods of time, and I believe decapitation and fire are both self-explanatory."

I nodded at him. This was why he said that we are virtually eternal. The likely hood of death if we were careful was almost impossible.

"I'll show you to a guest room. But shouldn't we do something about my father's body? And what about Marguerite?"

"I believe she will be easily controlled. As far as his body, we should dispose of it before the sun rises."

We removed the body out of the back of the house and placed it deep into the woods on the other side of the empty fields. We figured if his body was found, it would be believed that he met a gruesome death by the hands of some wild predator and even if they found the holes in his neck, the death shouldn't be traced back to our home. With no blood spilled in the house there would be little that could come of the death and I as heir would take control of the plantation and all of the assets that were once my father's.

~oOo~

Weeks passed with little changes in the plantation. They found my father's body deep in the woods with little flesh left on his bones. He was only identifiable by the large ring that he always wore. It was declared that he died of natural causes but then a pack of wild dogs or coyotes scavenged his body after he died. I played the part of the distraught son well, but my torturous attitude had nothing to do with his death. The power that came with overpowering him was soon gone and the realization of what I'd allowed myself to become was weighing on me. I was an unnatural being, a predator, a murder, and I hated myself for it. Self-loathing was quickly becoming a behavior that I wore on my sleeve.

I had begun to give more freedoms to the slaves that lived on my land, I allowed them to leave the plantation, not caring for one minute if they ran away or left for good. I didn't want them to see what I had become. I didn't want them to notice my new behavior or the behavior of my constant companion.

Eric had moved permanently into the room that I gave him on that first night. He didn't like to hide his behavior, and it wasn't uncommon for him to take a stray slave for a meal, a practice that the superstitious men and women had noticed. They began to fear what was happening in their master's house. They didn't seem to suspect me, but they were terrified of Eric.

One evening Marguerite stopped me in the kitchen to ask me what was happening.

"Master, you must make your guest leave. Your companion is not of this world. He doesn't eat, or behave the way a normal man behaves. I am worried for you Master, you do not have the same appetite as you had. You don't come out of your room during the day and you spend your nights in town."

"And how is that different, Marguerite?" I laughed without mirth. "I've always enjoyed frequenting the pubs in town."

She placed her hand on my cheek, having not fed, my skin was probably chilled to the touch.

"Your skin is like ice, Master. Please, tell me what has changed about you."

I nuzzled my cheek into her hand, "Nothing has changed Marguerite. And how many times have I asked you to stop calling me master."

Her touch so tender, her words so sweet. I wanted to take comfort in her now as I had wanted just weeks ago. Her warmth and kindness called to me as they always had. But now I could hear her thoughts. Her mind reeled at my change. She worried for me. For the first time I felt the love and affection that this woman felt toward me. It warmed me that my feelings weren't unrequited, but the harsh reality of what I let myself become and what it meant for her settled in my gut like lead. I could never have her, not like I had once wanted her. I leaned my head into her stomach and instead of feeling comfort as she stroked my hair, I only felt the draw of predator to prey. The smell and feel of her sweet, soft skin, the sound of her heart beat and her blood rushing through her body made me crazy. As hard as I tried to fight it, I knew I would only be able to rest when her life's blood was running through my body. When the sound of her heartbeat was deadened and all the warmth was gone from her body would I finally find respite for my ravenous hunger.

I slowly moved her hand from my face and kissed the palm of hand and her wrist. I continued to keep my eyes down as I kissed my way up her arm, across her collarbone and to her throat. The entire time I thought about how much I wanted her, how much I had always loved her. My thoughts poured through me as I sucked and took small nips at her skin. Her soft moans propelling the desire to take her. It was sensual and driving me mad for her in more ways than one. I wanted her as a man wants a woman, but I lusted to taste her. I could smell her blood and her desire for me. Her pours secreted the lustful smell that threatened to drive me mad. I continued across her skin and until I found her pulse in her neck as her life's blood called to me. Just as I was ready to sink my teeth into her vein, another sight took hold. A vision of her mother, like a ghost, stood in front of me. The warmth of her smile as two small children ran around her feet while she cooked. The pale skinned boy and darker skinned girl played tag around the kitchen while the motherly figure looked on lovingly. It was a vision of the past. It played over and over in front of me and all I could do was freeze and watch.

The realization of what I was about to do shot through me. Staggering back from her, I was shocked at the visions that were still playing on a loop in my sight. I was surprised at how quickly I let my instincts take over, at my level of male arousal at the idea of having this woman and feeding from her. Looking into her terrified eyes, I could see the realization dawning on her as she came to her senses.

Looking into my now changed eyes she let out a shrill scream. "Tobias, what has happened to you? What has happened to your eyes?"

"Go now Marguerite. Go now and don't come back. Tell the others they are released," I growled. The smell of her still invaded me, her heart called to me, but I still could see her mother before me, watching us play as children. I didn't understand why I could see this past event. All I really knew was that I needed her to get as far away as she could.

"But Tobias, please. Throw out the monster that has taken over your home. Do not force me to go. I want to be here with you," she implored, begging me to not throw her out. The woman that I loved since childhood, also loved me. I could hear it in her thoughts, felt it in the way she looked at me and all over the house. She'd done her best to protect me from my father for years. That was why she gave herself so willingly to him. She was protecting me as best as she could.

I bared my teeth, allowing my elongated eye teeth to show. She gasped at the sight of me. "The devil," she whispered. Tears streamed down her honey colored skin, her voice rising with each word she spoke, "He's the devil! And he's turned you into a demon."

"That's right, I'm a demon. Run, get out of here! Run!" I growled. Pushing her away from me I started shouting, "Go. Get out of here. Leave this place. Leave this hell." Picking up a lantern, I hurled it toward her. It landed on the floor and exploded in flames as the fuel splattered across the floor on the draperies. "Leave, get out!"

She ran from the house shouting, "The devil! The Master is a demon!" The other slaves came running toward the house to see what she was shouting about. Several men tried to enter the house, but I bared my teeth, threatening them. Their fear of the supernatural and of demons forced them to stay back.

"Well, now you've done it," Eric complained from behind me.

I laughed at his words, hysterical with grief and the realization that I was a monster, the devil.


	3. 100 Years Later

Chapter 3

One Hundred Years Later- 1889

Eric and I moved through the streets of London, making our way to yet another party thrown by a socialite. I tired of this place and of these parties, but Eric loved them. A century we had been traveling Europe. For a century we had been pretending to belong with the elite of society. Eric believed he belonged there, but all I could hear and see were echoes of the past. It had been a century since the night I burned my father's home to the ground. Marguerite ran from my home, the fear of the devil chasing her and the other slaves from the area. Their shouts of fear and damnation threatening to take me. But instead of dealing with them, I burned it all down. The house, the barns, everything. I burned it all to the ground and pissed on the ashes. Eric just stood by and watched in disbelief as I destroyed my father's legacy, everything he built, but I felt relief from it. It felt good to watch it burn.

Every day since that day I thought about the look in Marguerite's eyes, the sounds of her shouting 'the devil' as she ran from the house, and the smell of the house burning. I could see that night over and over as if it was happening in front of me again and again. That night Eric and I stayed in one of the rooms in the tavern in which we had met. The following days, I liquidated all of my father's assets and within two weeks I sold the land. I had done everything I could to expel the evil from that land. I would have been happy to leave it barren forever, but I would need money to live for an extended period of time. I needed to make sure that the money I received was properly invested for an endless future. A month later, Eric and I got onto a steamship headed for Europe and for the past hundred years we have traveled through Europe, schmoozing the London elite. Eric made it his mission to know every posh party and gathering throughout the entire continent. He loved the taste of the rich and powerful. He could never survive off of the dregs of society. Our time on the steam ship, feeding off of rats and other vermin had been a miserable time for Eric. I, on the other hand, took pleasure in the fact that I could survive off of such creatures.

One evening, as usual, we found ourselves among the elite of British society. Dukes and Duchesses, knights, and counts were all present, making for quite the smorgasbord of delights for Eric. All night I tried to squelch the desire to take one of the servants into a secluded area and drain them of their life's blood. I made it my mission over the years to feed off of those people whose life was not worth living. I had not allowed myself the pleasure of the hunt in many years. The longer I went, the more difficult it has been to quench my thirst and my predatory desires. The hunt and capture were as much a part of me as the need for sustenance.

I watched as Eric socialized with a horribly ostentatious woman with more diamonds and jewels on her than the queen herself. The woman was the epitome of indulgence. It was women like this that helped increase the money that I had acquired after my father's death. We were living high off of the money and jewels we received after feeding from such people.

I focused in on Eric's prey. Her thoughts screamed her pleasure as Eric kissed her behind her ear and whispered something to her. She believed she was better than other woman here, as if by showcasing her bosoms and her figure it would bring the high society men to their knees. And for many, I'm sure it worked. But all she's managed to do this evening was get the attention of Eric and his insatiable appetite.

As I watched Eric, a thrumming of a heartbeat took over my senses and the rush of blood through veins drew my attention. I had not heard this sound this prominently for a long time. Eric always said I had the gift of singling out the one person in a crowd that my body craved. I had done it with Marguerite and several other times over the century, but it had been at least a decade since I felt a pull to a specific human. The secretion of lust and the pull of blood called to me. Across the room I spotted a high society woman in all of her made up glory. Her body screaming out for me to take her. When she caught my eye, I knew she craved me as much as I did her. But her craving had nothing to do with nourishment, her craving was for a young man that she could mother and smother. That was how I would be able to have my way with her. My overwhelming need for this woman overrode all other senses.

Without thinking of the consequences, I made my way across the room to the woman who was now fanning herself. Her body flushed with anticipation and need, it was screaming for the release that only I could give her. I took her hand in mine and kissed it gently, nipping the skin of her knuckles. She giggled at my audacity and sighed.

"Why is such a young, handsome man coming to talk to an old woman?" she asked.

I smiled, the thrill of the hunt taking over my senses, making me feel alive for the first time in ages. My body craved this woman, it needed what only she could provide right now. I spoke to her allowing my heavy French accent through, I had found that the society women loved it. "My love, I crave the taste of your body on my tongue."

My declaration caused her body to excrete such lust that I wanted to take her then and there. I could smell her desire, her need for release. Taking her hand in mine once more, I caressed her palm with my tongue, tasting her sweetness.

She stood and moved to me, taking my arm and leaning her ample bust into my arm, "I am old enough to be your mother."

Leaning into neck, I breathed in her sweet scent. "I am an orphan, craving the love only a mother can give." I whispered into her neck, nipping at her soft skin. It was exactly the declaration she wanted to hear. I could hear her every thought, sense her every desire.

The sound of her heart hammering inside of her chest and her blood rushing through her veins lulled me into a predatory state. She had what I needed, what I craved. I could not survive one more day living without the hunt. I needed this as much as I needed her blood in my veins.

"Come with mother then, my love," she said to me. "Let me show you the love only a mother can provide."

I let her lead me out onto the terrace and toward a secluded shelter on the grounds. Once out of sight of the house, I took her supple body into my arms and began to drink in her smell and the taste of her skin on my tongue. She moaned out the pleasure of having my mouth devour her skin with my lips and tongue. When I grazed my teeth across her neck, nipping and biting slightly she moaned her approval louder. My small bites sent small drops of blood cascading down her skin, making her even more irresistible. Sinking my hands into her bosom, I caressed and nipped my way to her ample chest leaving a blood trail across her skin that she didn't notice but I craved. Her body was pliable under my touch, her blood tasted sweet on my tongue. This was the part I enjoyed the most, the arousal. Her lust called to me to take her. Her body wanted me, needed me. She continued to moan as I moved my mouth across her exposed chest and neck, taking small nips from her skin, drawing blood as I went. She didn't even realize that I'd drawn blood as I continued to lap it up from her breasts. She moaned out her pleasure. "Oh, my darling. You are so attentive and I love your aggressiveness with my body."

My thoughts told her to relax and enjoy my attention. I told her that she loved the pain with the pleasure, that she craved it. I could hear her thoughts repeating what I was projecting to her. I hadn't really realized that I could do that. But the more I told her to relax and enjoy the pain, the more pliable her body became. She continued to writhe and moan under me, until I could no longer take the foreplay. I sunk my teeth into her vein, taking what she had to give. With a sharp gasp and whimper, she clamped onto my shoulders and tried to shake me away, forcing me to wrap my arms securely around her frail body. I drained her to the brink of death, allowing her one last moment of life before I took her completely. I removed my mouth from her vein and whispered into her ear, "A mother does not treat a son in such a way, my love." I then sunk my teeth in once more and took every last drop until her heart stuttered in her chest and was silent.

I gently laid the woman on a bench and took my leave. Someone would find her, someone would also find the marks in her breasts and neck. I knew it but I didn't care. I finally felt the hunger again and I was drunk off of it. It was like a switch was thrown in my head. Suddenly the need to be amongst the humans and the hunt that I had been avoiding were the only things that mattered to me. I didn't care about being discovered, I only cared about the elation I felt after such a successful hunt.

With a new found strength, I walked across the lawn and found Eric disposing of his latest conquest. When he saw me he scowled.

"Finally, what did you do with the body?"

"It is in the shelter just off of the grounds."

"You need to clean up your mess. You cannot leave it there."

I growled at the man who had become the equivalent of my father in my eyes. The difference was, now I was no longer afraid to stand up. I was stronger than Eric, and he knew that I was and that worried him.

He stood abruptly, "I'll take care of it." He stalked off toward the shelter at the end of the lawn. He only dealt with me because of my strength and he would clean up my mess because he enjoyed the society gatherings. He never cared when I only fed from the dregs that we passed on the streets, so long as I accompanied him to these things so he didn't have to stop hunting among the elite of society. But when I took one for myself, he knew he would have to clean it up or we would have to move along again.

The thrill of the hunt and the feeling of fullness in me was better than I remembered. Why had I denied myself this feeling for so long? I felt strong, I felt powerful.

When Eric returned, he looked upon me in awe and fear.

"Did you see what you did to that woman?"

"I devoured her, as did you to the other," I said without feeling.

"No, you tore her body to shreds. Was she still alive when you did that?"

I smirked, "Of course she was alive when I started. She enjoyed my slow devouring of her body. She craved it, she loved it."

"I do not know how you did it without her calling out for help. Her breasts were completely shredded. Why did you do such a thing?"

"Her lust called for me. She wanted me to consume her body in such a way."

"You can smell their arousal?" he asked me, shock in his tone.

"I can, it was what called her to me in the first place. Her desire was her undoing."

Eric laughed but there was no mirth in it. It was more fear and nervousness. I knew he worried about what he did when he made me. He didn't know the extent of my powers but he knew I had abilities that he didn't. He was afraid of me and what I could eventually do. I heard the terror in his thoughts, the worry that he created one that was too strong. But he maintained the smile, "You have become quite the predator, Tobias. It is unfortunate that you only come out to play every half century."

I scowled at his words. I have lived off of dregs of society for so long, I forgot how I loved the hunt. I turned away from Eric and stalked off through the grounds to our wagon. I would return to our hotel and tomorrow I would leave London, it was time to see other countries in Europe, with or without Eric.

~oOo~

Several days later we found ourselves on the streets of Paris. Eric was less than happy to leave, but he wouldn't let me leave without him. He needed me more than I needed him. His every fear screaming to me from his thoughts. I had found over the past century that I could hear other's thoughts. It started with my father, but then as time progressed I could hear Eric, my prey, and any other humans within my vicinity. It was a helpful skill that I kept to myself for a long time.

It was a pleasure to be in Paris, back among the people that my mother came from. My mother was from Paris and loved the Parisian lifestyle. She despised my father for taking her away from her land and forcing her to be his slave. She was an acquisition he gained from a prominent landowner in New Orleans. She was brought to America during the Revolution and sold to my father. He paid well for a virgin as beautiful as she. He stole her innocence and made her his sexual slave until he killed her.

In spite of the questionable means to which she arrived on the shores of America, she loved me with all of her heart. She always said I was her greatest gift. She was the reason I remained in that house, even after her death. I had to avenge her. She was my mother, my protector, and my guide and when she was taken from me because of my father's cruelty, I swore I'd take vengeance for her and return to Paris.

There I was, on the shores of her homeland, but I could not feel her in Paris any more than I could in America or anywhere else. When my father snuffed out her life, he took everything she ever was and destroyed it. But I got my revenge. Nothing of his legacy remained, but I would live on forever, and therefore so she would as well.

I wandered the streets, taking in Notre Dame and the other sights that made up the city. It was a beautiful and powerful place. I could feel everything that made up this city, I could feel its history, the wars and deaths that made Paris so extraordinary.

Out of the corner of my eye I caught a glimpse of an odd looking man. He hovered in the shadows, half way between solid and mist. He appeared to be intrigued with my presence. A tingling zipped throughout my senses and my body, alerting me to his presence. Eric once told me that some vampires could feel others that were nearby. I wondered if this was what he meant. I got this feeling when he was around, but I only thought it was because he created me. But I had a feeling that not only was this strange presence another vampire, but he was also a powerful one. I could feel his power and strength coursing through his body. He had recently fed, adding to the sense of strength emanating from him.

I turned and encountered the most magnificent creature that I had ever seen. He was majestic and beautiful with his long dark brown hair and hulking stature. When he approached, I could feel his desire for me, he wished to take me as his companion. He could sense my strength and power also, I could feel it.

He turned and flowed down an alley toward what appeared to be church, but it looked to be abandoned. He entered, leaving the door open to invite me in. I followed him through the church to where the priest would stand to deliver his sermon. He didn't speak or even acknowledge my presence, until I approached him. Standing silently, I waited for him and when he turned to me and locked his eyes with mine, I could feel his age. He was ancient. His age and power were centuries old, making me feel insignificant standing in his presence. How could this ancient creature call to me?

"Hello my young vampire. My name is Amar. What brings you to Paris?"

"My name is Tobias. I am fulfilling a promise I made a century ago. I do not wish you any harm."

Amar laughed my comment. "You, my young one, couldn't harm me. I am ancient."

I looked upon him in awe. He was mesmerizing. I felt as though he was talking to my subconscious instead of to me. I felt like I could hear his every thought in my head. I usually only heard some of what others thought, but I could hear everything from him. He told me that he wanted me. He wanted me to stay here and help him to rid himself of the selfish creatures that took over the Parisian streets. The loathsome vampires that engorged themselves nightly.

Much like Eric, from the images that I saw from my companion, the vampires of this place were self-indulgent and greedy. They looked at humanity like they were livestock, only bred for their pleasure. Where Eric loved humans, these creatures hated them and everything to do with them.

"This Eric you refer to, he was the one who made you. No?"

"Yes he made me."

"And you travel with him? Where is he tonight?"

"Probably trying to seduce a high society woman. He enjoys wealth and stature in his meals."

Amar regarded me, "And you do not?"

I shook my head, "I feed only on those too loathsome to be missed. And only on others when their blood or bodies call to me. I enjoy the hunt, but try not to indulge myself often."

"I wish you to stay with me young vampire."

I stared at him, he was beautiful but he was terrifying. His long flowing dark brown hair and olive colored skin was smooth and perfect. His almond shaped brown eyes were a warm and comforting color, but the edge behind his eyes was cruel. His eyes held me captive, showing me both truth and desire in their depths. I knew I could learn so much from him. There was so much that Eric refused to tell me or teach me. Or there was much that Eric never knew.

"I could teach you all of the things that this Eric could never," Amar said after apparently reading my mind. I could feel him invading my thoughts. "I could help you to understand why your powers and strength surpass so many others. If you stay with me I will do this for you. I will make sure you understand."

"And what of the others? I may be strong, but I cannot defend myself against so many."

I had no idea how I knew that I would not be a welcome addition to the others that lived there. I also had no idea how I knew how many others there were. It scared me how in tune I was with my surroundings and with Amar, almost as if I could read more than Amar's mind, but like I could read the imprint these creatures left on the city.

"You can read their imprints, you are quite powerful. This is the reason that they will not welcome you. But I will love you, Tobias. I will protect you, teach you, and love you. You will learn to be more powerful than any other with me. Stay with me."

I stared at this ancient creature in awe. I knew my decision was already made. I had to learn from Amar, I had to take this opportunity because it may never arise again.


	4. The Others

Thought I'd give you another chapter to tide you over for the real thing. I hope you are enjoying the book so far and would love to hear your feedback about what you've read so far! Also, if you're on facebook, I would love it if you went over to my author's page and gave me a like. Shelly Davis - Author.

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Chapter 4

The Others

I walked alone through the dank, hollow city. The sun set on the streets of Paris cast a somber shadow over everything. At this point it had been a hundred years since I last saw the light of day, and even in life I didn't see if often. I was always a creature of the dark. A brooding and dark man who endured death, despair, and the torture handed down at the hands of my father. Even before I could be considered a creature of the night, I preferred to hide in the shadows. My brooding was considered normal by those that surround me, they did not understand the depth of my despair or how I punished myself daily for past misdeeds. My mood was only made worse by the presence of the Others. They loomed in the shadows cast by the lanterns throughout the city streets, disappearing and reappearing as I neared or moved away. Their animosity toward me seemed to fuel my mood.

The Others were a large coven of old vampires, all of them around three hundred years old. They lived in a time when humans believed in the supernatural. They believed in vampires and werewolves and what those creatures could do to humans. Humans feared and respected the supernatural beings that lived alongside them. They offered sacrifices to keep themselves safe from being hunted. Over the years, humans saw less and less of the creatures that they believed to be vampires and over time they mostly stopped believing. They still told stories to their young about the supernatural forces that walked the land taking innocent lives, but it was done to scare the innocent and make them comply with rules. After a while, their belief in vampires no longer ruled their lives. The Others lived through this, they witnessed the demise of their power over the humans. Now they were relegated to keeping in the shadows and hunting. They didn't understand humans like Eric. They were too afraid to show themselves in order to become closer to the humans. So they treated humans much like a hunter treats the deer in the woods. They hunted what they needed, but always stayed out of sight until it was time for the kill.

The Others were upset that Amar had sought my companionship. They thought that I was an abomination because I was from the new world. These vampires followed the old ways, being hundreds of years old they did not like the changes that had occurred around them. They did not like that they had to hide who they were from the world. Hundreds of years ago, they were feared, respected, and even loved. At this point, they were believed to be nothing more than terrifying fairytales or nightmarish stories told to scare the innocent. This was especially true in America. We were not feared in America, even in Europe the fear had greatly dwindled. We were only feared by those who believed in the old ways.

The Others constantly threatened to destroy me. I could hear their anger in their thoughts. They watched my every move and worried over my connection to the elder vampire. The only reason the Others hadn't attacked was because they feared Amar. He was older than the rest and from what I found, with that age comes strength and power beyond that of fledglings. He was an ominous creature full of mystery and radiating power beyond measure. The Others would not go against him, even if they had the advantage of numbers.

Eric was angry that I was approached by such an old creature when we arrived in Paris. He believed that he should be the one sought after by the old one. Instead of being desired, Eric was scoffed at. Amar believed him to be arrogant and foolish. He believed that Eric would bring his own demise because of his ostentatious behaviors. Eric loved to rub elbows with wealthy, attending garish parties wherever he went. He chose his next meal from those wealthy people. Eric was also weak in comparison to many. His senses were superior to that of humans and some weaker vampires and he had superior speed to humans, but he was not extraordinary compared to the Others.

I found myself on a familiar road near the Eifel Tower when I began to pick up on the history of the area. It always surprised me when I picked up imprints of the past and of people from long ago.

"That is because you have superior psychic powers," a voice sounded behind me. I turned to find the familiar face of Amar. "It is the reason that certain humans seem to call to you more than others and the reason that you see glimpses of the past. If you focus you will be able to hear the thoughts of not only humans but other vampires along with reading the imprints that have been left behind on your surroundings and on others. They won't be able to hide from you once you've mastered this ability."

I glanced around looking from the tower to the streets below. I could see bloodshed, war, and death. I could feel the fear and loathing and smell the blood of the ancients on the cobblestone. I concentrated on Amar, he was strong so I wasn't sure if I would be able to read his thoughts but I tried. Then he spoke to me, but not aloud. He spoke to me in my thoughts.

"My young vampire, you are quite the extraordinary creature. It has been many centuries since I encountered a creature of your strength at such a young age."

"How are you speaking to me in my head?" I asked. It was quite an unusual experience to hear his voice resonating through my brain. I took in the sight of him. His power surrounded him, his aura thrumming with the energy to draw all those that were him. I didn't think humans would be able to stay away from him, his potency kept me in place even when I wasn't sure I wanted to be near him.

"It is a gift we share," he explained. "The way you are focusing on my thoughts will work for any other vampire and human. You will be able to hear their thoughts and use that information to your benefit."

"Will the Others know that I am reading their thoughts?"

"Only those with the same ability will be able to sense your intrusion. None of the Others have this ability to this extent. But several do have it."

I nodded my head and thought about the Others. "What are other abilities may I have?" I needed to be able to defend myself against them and if they were stronger than me, I needed to find a way to gain the upper hand against them.

"Along with your superior strength, speed, and senses, you can read thoughts. I suspect that with practice you should be able to dissolve into the shadows or mist, and shape shift into creatures of the night such as the wolf or bat. Your ability to heal yourself may also be exceptional, maybe even to the point that you could go into the sun for short periods of time without incident."

"Eric said the sun will kill me. He said that I would erupt into flames," I said confused.

"Eric does not understand the extent of your strength. If he were wise, he would not have made such a powerful creature."

"How could he had known?"

"If Eric had bothered, he should had been able to sense your strength while you were human. It is more than likely what drew him to you, he just didn't understand it. A strong human becomes an astonishing vampire." He smiled and shook his head at me. It was an odd gesture for such an ancient creature. "Eric does not matter any longer, you will be my companion. We will walk this world together becoming more powerful, becoming one."

I wasn't sure if that was really what I wanted. To be tied to this being forever wasn't something that really appealed to me at that time. I wasn't sure if I wanted to be tied to anyone. I longed to be alone. But this creature held the answers to my questions. Questions that plagued my dreams and seeped into my waking mind. But something that he said buzzed in my head. He talked of my strength when I was alive.

"How was I strong in life? I was a drunk, a weakling."

"Your ability to read imprints is not a vampire ability. It is something you brought with you. Also you must have been a strong and foreboding man in life. Tell me, did those you encountered fear you? Did you feel as though you just knew things about people or places that you maybe shouldn't have known?"

"I don't know. I guess I always could tell if a person was a good person or not. But I don't think I knew about places," I explain. I didn't want to get into how my father acted or treated me and the fact that I was the one that felt fear, not others.

"Tobias, you had mental and physical strength beyond most. Whether you realize it or not, the trials you… endured… made you strong. I suspect that your enhanced abilities came from your mother. I also suspect that was the real reason for her premature death."

"What do you mean?" I couldn't understand how this creature could possibly know what happened or know things about my mother that I didn't? How could he see these things if I didn't have them in me?

"It is one of my abilities. I too have special abilities that others don't have. Abilities that I was born with. Your mother was an innocent, a child of nature. She was in tune with it, as are you. She was murdered, is that correct?"

"Yes."

"She was killed because of who she was. She was sensitive to those around her. She tried to help them. She, much like you, had special abilities that others did not understand. I suspect that someone considered her a witch and killed her for it." Amar paused for a few moments, allowing me to take in the new information about my mother. She and my father were long gone, but her death still haunted me. "I know you blame yourself for her death, but don't. You were but a child and your father was a cruel and vindictive man."

"But isn't that what I am now? A cruel and vindictive being?"

Amar looked at me and a dark look crossed his face. "Is the lion or tiger cruel or vindictive to his prey? They do not kill for sport, they kill to survive. This is what we do. We kill to survive. We use our abilities to find sustenance and we use it to survive, to live. We are no crueler than the tiger. Mankind is the cruel species. They hunt for sport, not always for food. They kill innocent animals and people because they believe they are superior." He stopped again and took a deep breath, "I know you are unsure about all of this and about everything I say. Eric has not educated you very well. We will go to him. I believe there is a society party tonight that he will want to attend. You can read him yourself. See for yourself."

Amar and I went to the hotel that Eric and I had been occupying for the past week since our arrival. When we entered the room, Eric was preparing to leave.

"Tobias, I am glad you have returned. There is a wonderful party at the Louver museum. We should…" Eric stopped talking when he noticed Amar standing behind me. "What is he doing here?"

"Eric, it has been many years," Amar said.

"Years?" I ask. I wasn't aware that they had known each other. I first thought that Eric was jealous because he wanted Amar to want him. But maybe there was something else there that fueled Eric's anger.

Suddenly voices started bouncing around inside of my head. Voices that did not belong to me, but belonged to Eric and Amar. It was abundantly clear that these two held no love for each other and it stemmed from an incident that happened a century and a half ago. But for the first time I could hear the self-doubt and uncertainty hidden behind Eric's normally self-assured behavior. In his thoughts I could hear the distrust for Amar, his longing for companionship, and his worry that I would realize how powerful and beautiful Amar was and how pathetic and weak Eric was in comparison. Eric's affinity for beauty and wealth was what he used to hide his self-loathing and fears. His thoughts told me that he realized and understood his weakness and that he was weak in more ways than I ever realized.

In my head I also heard Amar's thoughts. However his thoughts were directed more at me, pointing out all of Eric's faults. Also pointing out how easy it would be for me to leave Eric behind and transcend him and even rise above the Others.

I thought of Eric. I allowed my thoughts to project to Amar. This was something that I realized that I could do also. I had done it with Marguerite and with the society woman in England to calm them and get what I wanted. I could project my thoughts to him in order for him to hear exactly what I want him to and try to avoid some of the other things that plagued my brain.

"You are right, my young vampire. Your projections are far more powerful than your thoughts. I am impressed that you were able to figure out that if you project some of your thoughts you can hide others. Well done, young one," Amar reminded me that he was still there, hearing and reading everything that I would allow him.

"Eric," I said aloud. "Let's go to the Louvre tonight. Amar has invited us as his personal guests."

Eric scowled. His demeanor changed drastically, searching me. Was he trying to read my thoughts? Was he trying to find something in me that he could manipulate? I wasn't sure. I projected thoughts about the party and returning America toward Eric, but he didn't seem to pick up on any of it. His thoughts were nothing but a jumble of broken feelings and fears. Amar, however, heard all of my projected thoughts and was scowling at me.

Instead of approaching the subject. Amar smiled at Eric. "Come Eric. It would be my pleasure to introduce you to your next conquest."

The three of us left the hotel and I was feeling horribly drained. Reading thoughts and projecting my thoughts was trying on me. That compiled with constantly reading the imprints of the past on everything around me was draining. I hoped that I would be able to control these powers and become stronger because of them. Out on the streets of Paris, I was overwhelmed with sights of war and struggle. But then I was overrun with the hateful thoughts of the Others. When we walked toward the Louvre I could feel and hear them. They were all around in the cobblestone, in the buildings, but especially in the shadows. I could feel them calling to me, telling me I was an abomination. That I shouldn't be. The thoughts of returning to America once again invaded me.

"You wish to return to America?" Amar said in my head.

"I do not wish to be in Europe for eternity. The Others, they do not like me here. Even now, I can hear their thoughts and feel their hatred. I will not allow these creatures to continuously threaten me."

"You are safe with me, young one."

"But who says you are safe with me."

Amar gave me a pointed look, and the telekinetic conversation was over. The reality that if the Others really wanted, they could overtake both of us was sobering. Amar believed he was above the Others. He believed that because of his superior age and power they would cave to him. I did not feel the same, however. They saw a union between Amar and me as a threat to them. They knew Amar's power and respected it, but according to what I could feel and hear, they feared mine.

We walked in to the Louvre and immediately Eric's demeanor changed. He projected an air of authority and belonging that the humans would be drawn to. They loved power, they flocked to those that they believed would benefit them in some way. Eric was good at reading humans. And I realized that was his most beneficial gift, beyond the enhanced speed and senses, Eric knew humanity. He understood it, he knew what made them tick. He knew how to make these men and women feel comfortable around him. He knew how to make them feel like he could never harm them. He lulled them into a sense of security. He was much more powerful than Amar or the Others gave credit.

"This is another of your abilities, young vampire," Amar approached me, speaking aloud. "You can sense the abilities in your kind. You have found something in our friend that the Others and even I overlooked. You even see the benefit of such an ability whereas the Others find humanity to be nothing but livestock for their taking. Something to be tended to, to be overseen and used when the need arises. They don't realize that our only safety is in the fact that the humans no longer believe in our presence. Fear is dangerous, young one, and fear is what will be our demise."

I took in everything that Amar said. Part of his strength was that he was wise. He had seen centuries of humanity and supernatural beings. He had seen the rise and fall of many civilizations and societies. He knew the strengths and weaknesses of humanity and of those like us. I looked around at the changes that I'd seen in the past century, imagining the changes that could be seen in five hundred or a thousand years was a crippling thought.

I took in my surroundings and watched Eric as he made a socialite swoon at his words. I could see the beauty in Eric. His skin was perfect like porcelain, the color of light brown sugar, and he was flawless. He had an exotic look to him. Being originally from Spain, he was beautiful. He stood at just under six feet in height, so his stature wasn't menacing. His warm brown eyes were inviting and seemed almost caring and loving. It was his kind, handsome face and warm eyes that made him appear to be sincere. It wasn't until he was ready to feed that the predatory gaze of his cold supernatural eyes could be seen. The pale blue that came out just before he gave his companion his deathly kiss. He was beautiful and dangerous in a way that these ancient vampires would never understand.

I allowed my gaze to take in Amar now. He was flawless, beautiful but even the humans could sense that he was different. I could see how they looked at him. They feared him, but they didn't understand why. They felt drawn to his beauty and perfection, but they knew there was something about him that was dangerous. Amar had long dark brown hair, tanned olive skin, and brown eyes. He had a Mediterranean look to him, being from southern Italy. His broad body stood at a height just over six feet, which seemed to tower over most men. His stature and the way he carried himself was intimidating and full of foreboding, but he attracted the humans because he had an arrogance and confidence about him. He dressed much like Eric and myself. We all melded with the humans to the best of our ability.

The three of us together seemed to have most of the humans on edge. The sight of the three of us seemed to intimidate them but also drew them in. I knew what the humans saw in me. I knew that they saw a young man in his early twenties. The thoughts of some of them invaded my brain. They saw a handsome young man, my long brown hair and my bright deep blue eyes drew them to me. My human eyes were always the color of the deep sea, they saw this color along with my pale skin and dark hair as handsome. My remarkable height made me unapproachable to these mortals, standing slightly taller than Amar, I was exceptionally tall by European standards. To the human females I was extraordinarily handsome as well. My hulking figure and my body toned from years of working on the plantation in my humanity gave my body a broadness that females were attracted to.

The ability to see imprints on my surroundings and from people gave me the ability to see what they saw. I could see how I looked from the point of view of those around me. I knew that what they saw was a beautiful but daunting man. I knew that they yearned to be nearer to me, but they were not sure why. I also knew that my brooding look was both menacing and enticing to mortals.

I could also sense what the Others thought. The Others were concerned, fearful of what the three of us being together meant. Fear was precarious. Dread leads the fearful to act out in ways that are not rational and irrationality was dangerous. That made the Others very dangerous.

The Others did not engage themselves with the humans. They did not know them like Eric, terrify them like Amar, or even intrigue them like me. The mortals didn't even seem to notice the Others. I was not sure if that was because the Others didn't draw attention to themselves or if it was because they were not conspicuous. The Others would have probably looked odd to humanity. They tended to dress and behave as they did hundreds of years ago when they were human. To mortals, that would make them odd or eccentric. It would also probably cause humans to shy away from them. Humans cower from oddity or peculiarity.

After hours at the Louvre, I had come to realize several things. The first being that Eric was more skilled at gaining acceptance and trust from humans that even I realized before. He could seduce men and women alike, he had no specific preference at any given moment. Next, Amar's awkwardness was endearing to the female population. They flocked to him, batting their eyelashes and flaunting their bodies to him. And finally, it had become abundantly clear that none of these people appealed to me. None of them subliminally called out to me, seeking my deadly kiss. However, I was hungry so I just decided to take someone. The thrill of taking someone who subconsciously wanted me to take them would not happen tonight.

By the time we returned to the hotel, we were all sated and content. Amar had a new appreciation for Eric's ways, however he still did not wish for his companionship like he desired mine. Eric did not like Amar, believing him to be pompous and overbearing. The Others were now more worried about Eric and his presence in Paris than ever before. His behavior was in direct contrast to the way in which they lived. He was an affront to their life and their survival. I feared for his safety, however Eric was not rational. He did not care to change for anyone and he knew no fear of man nor immortal.

Once we were safe inside the hotel, just before dawn, I found that I was more homesick than I had ever been before. Even after a century I still longed for familiar shores. But I wasn't sure it would it ever be the right time to return to America and New Orleans seemed completely out of the question. There were too many memories, bad memories in Louisiana. I wasn't even sure if what I thought I missed so much would even still be waiting for me. Much must have changed after all of this time.

"Why do you wish to return to such a horrid place? Do you not wish to stay with me?" Amar's thoughts reverberated through my mind. Even though his movements were silent, I was always aware of him.

"It is my home. It calls to me," I aloud. The telekinetic conversations wore on me.

"Young one, you mustn't leave me," Amar pleaded. "I have much to teach you. There is much you should know about yourself and about our kind. I can help you, teach you, give you the knowledge that you long for."

This was where Amar knew that he could get me to do what he wanted. He knew that there was so much that I didn't know. He knew that there was much that I desired to learn and understand. Eric couldn't give me the information that I so desired, but Amar could. He knew that by offering to share information and teach me, it would force me to stay. My desire to understand and learn was far greater than my desire to return to a home that may be nothing like I remembered.

"I know," I say. "But the desire grows. Someday I will want to return to my home. But not yet." I knew I would return someday, but now was not that time. I could bide my time.


	5. Vengence

Chapter 5

Vengeance

For two years Amar, Max, and I traveled around Paris, attending parties, pretending to be human, and moving from hotel to hotel to hide our behavior. We encountered the Others from time to time, but in spite of many of their threats, they stayed away from us. Because of their threats I discovered more to my abilities. Along with being able to see imprints and being able to project my thoughts, I could manipulate the thoughts and actions of others through projection. It was especially powerful to a person who was drawn to me. I could influence their thoughts, their desires, and their dreams. I could draw just about any human or weaker vampire to me and persuade them to do my bidding.

It was an extraordinary ability that terrified Max and intrigued Amar. I had found that it was quite helpful when feeding. I could manipulate humans so that they would come to me, I didn't have to try to convince them to be alone with me anymore. I also quite enjoyed controlling weaker vampires, especially the Others. Max frequently worried that I did things to control him. His thoughts told me that he no longer trusted me as his companion. He had even regretted creating me. Over the last two years Max had become the sniveling and whining child to Amar and myself. We frequently had to get him out of trouble, stop the Others from devouring him, or protect him from himself. It had become quite exhausting.

Max feared my developing strength, but he refused to leave. He continued to behave as the overindulged child, frequently complaining about every aspect of our lives. Amar frequently threatened to dispose of him, but had yet to follow through with his threats. He really indulged Max more than necessary.

Even with my constant companions, I was frequently lonely. I had found several people over the years whose blood called to me, much like my father's did the first time. I made these people my companions for the evening, but in the end I always drained them of life and continued on my lonely path.

Walking through the streets of Paris every night, I always found myself drawn to the Notre Dame. Something about the place and the building called to me more than any other place in the city. The history in this building was astonishing. But what I thought was drawing me most of all was the idea that now, as a creature of darkness, I was considered a damned by the religion that my mother so faithfully practiced. A place like that had no place for a creature such as myself. I once believed that within walls such as those was salvation, purity, and asylum. I may have still believed even after all the time that passed, and that terrified me more than anything. The thought that there really was a God and that my soul was damned was mortifying to me.

But something in this place called to me. I felt that something or someone important was there and they were there for me. Gazing toward the front of the building, I saw the large ornate doors open, spilling a dim glow on the steps below. Descending the steps in front of the enormous building was the most astonishing human that I had ever seen. I couldn't see her well, but she called to me. She was extraordinary. Immediately I could hear her body and blood calling out for me, more than any other human that I had ever encountered, even my father. She was dressed in a floor length dress that was plain in color, but on her, it was quite exquisite even in its dullness. From my vantage point I could see that she was of average height. She had dark hair pulled in a tight knot, a shapely and soft looking body, and a lovely face. My body hummed as she walked from the church and down the city streets. The pull I felt was more than I'd ever felt for any human before. I wanted to take her and make her mine. I wanted to taste her and feel her body, her desire. Her body must have sensed me, because she continuously looked around, taking in her surroundings like she was looking for something in particular.

When her eyes glided past me while I hovered in the shadows, it almost seemed as though she could see me. But she couldn't possibly see me, I was nothing but shadow and mist. But none-the-less, she still seemed to fix her eyes on me and in that gaze I could see her, truly see what she was. She was an innocent, a child of nature. Pure, perfect, and innocent.

I could hear her thoughts, she feared what she couldn't see. She was superstitious and thoroughly believed in creatures of darkness. She felt a pull towards something that she couldn't see, and it terrified her. She felt like the devil was calling to her, she was more right than she realized. But I didn't want to take her as my bride, I wanted to take her as my next conquest. My body hummed at her nearness, yet I remained in the shadows staring at her. Taking in her every thought and her every movement and craving the taste of her blood and the feel of her skin.

Her mind told me that her name was Beatrice. She was quite young, but she was old for her years. She was the orphan of a prostitute mother and an unknown father. She was mostly raised by the church and was now destined to be a nun. She was preparing to join the convent at Notre Dame. I couldn't allow her to do that. I had to make her mine. I had to take her, body and blood, and damn her to hell with all of the others.

She moved quickly through the streets of Paris, constantly looking into the shadows where I stood. It was curious that her body seemed to be just as drawn to me as I was to hers. This was more than a blood lust, this was a primal lust, a need for her body. Almost as if it belonged to me, like she belonged to me. I decided that I was going to take her. All of her purity and perfection would be mine, and I would savor her taste. I would devour her over and over for hours until she no longer had anything to give. And her quickened pace seemed to indicate that she knew this and feared her demise.

She retreated into the sanctity of a small house near the convent. They must have Been providing her with a safe place to live until she promised herself to God. Little did she know that she would never get the opportunity. God would not be taking her body, it would be me.

For the first time in over a century, I wanted more than this human's blood. I wanted her whole body. I wanted to share the carnal pleasures of the flesh, I wanted to devour her body with mine, then I wanted to devour her blood and make her one with me. Just the erotic images floating through me, made it almost impossible not to go straight into this house and take her. Everything in her was now screaming for me to take her. I needed to have her. But I would have to wait. She was safely inside of her home. A home I couldn't enter. I would simply bide my time until I could make her mine.

So for days I watched her. I watched as she spent her days and nights in the church or convent. She worked in the hospital, helping to care for the sick and injured while she made her rounds praying for them all. I watched every undertaking this beauty took on. I hunted her, devouring her every movement and feeling her every breath deep within me. Amar had noticed my obsession with this human. He insisted that such a blood lust often resulted in the vampire turning the human, but I did not wish to take her and bring her into my world. She was pure and that purity would be mine and mine alone. My only desire was to take her physically, sexually, and then consume her entire essence. Her body, blood, and every part of her would belong to me, and only me. And when it was done she would beg and moan for me to take her life.

The more the days went on, the closer I got to her. I wanted to know her every feature and every curve. Her beautiful body screamed for me to take her. On the third day I finally got a glimpse of her astonishing eyes. The unique color and the depth in those eyes pulled me to her even more. Her eyes, like doorways to her soul were a shocking shade violet. Never in my life had I seen eyes as these. In their depths I could see her spirit, feel her strength, and ability. Her soft features made her large amethyst eyes stand out even more. Her lips soft and supple, her oval face was perfect and beautiful. I wanted her now, more than any other human. I wanted to touch her skin and feel what was mine beneath the thick wool dress. I would have to take her soon. I didn't know how much longer I would be able to control my desire for this pure creature. I had to make her body and blood mine. I had to take her innocence and then I would take her life.

Nightly, I followed her from Notre Dame and through the Paris streets. Most nights she quickly walked from the church to her home and would lock herself inside, but this night was different. She didn't immediately return to her home as she usually did. She roamed the city, looking for something, looking for me. I could hear her thoughts, she wanted to know what was called to her in the city streets. She felt me. She knew that my eternal kiss awaited her, ready to take her completely. She wanted me, her body and blood wanted me as much as I wanted them. But I couldn't let her see me. I wasn't ready yet, she wasn't ready yet. She mustn't see me until her desire for me was just as high as mine was for her. I would take her, that night I intended on taking her.

I projected thoughts of the Louvre to her. I made her feel like that was the only place in Paris that could give her answers and it was the only place she wanted to be. I followed her through the streets, tracking her every movement and listening to her thoughts. Her innocence was amazing, but her abilities were astonishing. She had the power to see the future. She could see what was supposed to happen both for herself and for her surroundings. She knew what awaited her in the dark and yet she sought me. She didn't fear what I promised to bring to her, she wanted me to take her innocence, and she wanted me to take her body and her essence as my own. This was what I desired about her the most, her strength. She knew she was destined to die at the hands of an immortal being and yet she searched for me. Her thoughts called to me, as mine called to her. She walked into the Louvre and began to search for something that she didn't even know that she was looking for. My projections had Been working on her more than any other human I had ever encountered. She could feel me, she could sense me. She knew I was near and she wanted me, she craved me but didn't understand what she was feeling. She didn't know what drew her to the Louvre, she just knew that what she had Been searching for was near.

When I decided it was time to take her, I was interrupted by Max and Amar. Neither of them understood why I was playing with this one. But the hunt with her was just as exciting as taking her would be.

"Tobias, what are you doing?" Max asked. "Are you still following the innocent? Take her already. Make yourself a bride, kill her, but do something. You cannot keep following her, it is unnatural for us to expend such time on one conquest. Do what you must, but take her."

"For once I must agree with this pompous fool. You are taking too much time on this one. Take her now and be done with it."

They had me so distracted that suddenly I felt as though she was no longer near. I couldn't see her, feel her, or hear her. She couldn't have disappeared that quickly, she must be near.

I moved into the shadows and quickly left the building. I knew she was no longer close, so I knew something drew her outside. In the streets I could see the remnants of her imprinted on the cobblestones. I could feel her, sense her. But then I felt her fear. Wherever she was, she was terrified. I followed her essence through the city and the closer I got the more my worry intensified. What had drawn her out of the museum and into the streets when all she sought was me?

Then in the distance, I heard a horrific scream. The sound of pure terror rang through the night like the death toll of church bells. I knew that sound, I had heard it many times from my victims. But I also knew that voice, I had heard it in my head for the past few nights, talking to me in a way she never knew she was doing. It was the girl, my Beatrice. I moved through the shadows at the fastest speed that I had ever traveled, toward the sound of the cry. The city streets were silent, the unnatural peace that was Paris at night. Most humans knew nothing of this sound, knew nothing of this part of Paris unless they were whores or drunks. But my girl, she knew this sound, she knew because she was different.

I found an alley I felt her essence more than anywhere else in the city. She was here, she had Been here just moments ago. I stilled when I observed the group of Others hovered in a circle. There was no reason for their presence like this, in this capacity. They rarely lingered in large groups like this. But they all seemed to be interested in something and when I noticed what that something was, my body stilled.

In the arms of one of the creatures was a small human, dressed in the simple clothing that the church supplied. It was when I saw a small clump of dark brown hair flutter to the ground that I knew instantly who they had in their arms. One of the stronger vampires stepped forward and projected his thoughts at me.

_"__You should have known that when we found out your interest in this one that we would never let you have her. She was delicious, by the way. Pure and perfect. She will sustain us for weeks, her blood and body were so pure."_

I roared my fury and heartbreak into the night. They devoured her, destroyed her, and maimed her so I couldn't have her. They destroyed her mentally, torturing her with her fears before ripping her body and mind to shreds. I could see just what they did to her in their thoughts. It was a worse death than I had ever intended for the pure creature. My heart and mind bellowed an inhuman scream as I promised death to all those who were responsible for destroying this perfect creature in this manner. Just as I was ready to attack and slaughter all of them, the one cradling her dropped her to the ground. The Others scattered into the shadows, leaving her body broken and battered on the ground. I rushed to her side. It was the first time that I was this near to her and her beauty surpassed what even my supernatural eyes could see. The soft gaze of her violet eyes was fixed on the heavens, seemingly searching for salvation. But I no longer felt the pull of her blood or the attachment that her life had on me. She was gone, with her spirit and her purity that I loved from afar. My Beatrice was gone.

For the next nights I stalked the Others, learning about them. Where they went, what they did, where they hunted, but especially where they lived during the day. I found out when they returned to the place in which they stayed and when they ventured out for the night. I became obsessed with their every movement, every action. They would regret the day they took what was mine.

Max and Amar were both worried about my newest obsession. I could feel their apprehension and worry that I would get myself killed by seeking out the Others and getting my vengeance for the woman that would never be mine. They feared me, my wrath projected from me to the extent that humans were affected by my rage. On the night that I intended on taking down the Others, Amar came to me. He wanted to talk sense into me. He wanted to get me to back away from this and leave this place. But there was no way I would allow the Others to live.

"My young vampire," Amar approached cautiously. "I know what you are planning, but please don't do this. You will start a war that we may not be able to win. We are stronger, but outnumbered. Please, reconsider. We can leave this place, return to your America. Maybe I will like it there."

I ignored his pleas, however. I would not allow these creatures to continue on this earth after what they took from me. They had Been threatening me for years. Threatening to come after me, but they were too afraid to hit me directly. But I was not afraid of them. I was not afraid of anything, death included.

Amar read these thoughts and said no more. He knew there was nothing he could say or promise that would stop what was going to happen.

Just before nightfall, when the sun was still peaking over the horizon, I moved through the streets of Paris. I had recently found that the sun was not deathly for me, it only weakened me slightly. It was not good for me to be out in the daylight, but it wouldn't kill me like I once believed. I moved quickly to the rundown hotel on the outskirts of the city. It was a building believed by the locals to be haunted and full of bad omens. Many had met mysterious deaths on this property. Little did the humans know that it was haunted, not by ghosts but by a coven of vampires.

I moved into the building and immediately flew up the stairs to the upper most part of the hotel. No one was guarding or protecting the vulnerable vampires asleep within. So many were afraid of this place and these creatures living within these walls believed themselves to be safe.

I started to work, throwing fuel on everything that I could see, knocking down lanterns and watching as flames erupted all over the uppermost floors. From floor to floor and room to room I did the same thing, setting fire to everything that would burn. But when I got to the bottom floors, I was met with resistance. The screams of the Others on the floors above, burning to ash in the inferno that had Been created woke those on the bottom floors.

They rose and began to retaliate. But I was on a mission. I moved through them with little holding me back. I was fueled by rage, I was fueled by remorse, and I was fueled by love. I used my sword and sliced my way through the throngs of vampires that attempted to attack. I was a man on a mission and nothing could stop me until I had destroyed every last one of the loathsome creatures. When they realized that they could not gain the upper hand, some ran and escaped, some stayed and died. I decapitated, gutted, and sliced every vampire that dared try to resist me. Their blood fueling my rage and the flames within my dark heart. The blood that moved through them was hers. The blood that I spilled from them should be in her veins, or better yet, running through mine. So I took it back from them.

"You wanted a war?! You wanted me?! Well here I am! Come get me!" I screamed through the halls, killing and severing everything that moved in my path, all while knocking down lanterns and allowing the flames to engulf everything in sight.

The building began to quake as the fire took all of the fuel it could from the old wooden structure. It was just as murderous and unbiased as I. I did not care who died at my hands on this night. But then suddenly I was engulfed from behind, my thoughts so scattered that I was caught off guard. The voice that I heard in my head was that of Amar.

"Let's go young one. You will not die like this tonight. You have done your deed. Only about ten or so escaped your wrath. They have gone from this area."

I allowed Amar to pull me from the fire, exhausted from my rage and sorrow. We watched as the building was reduced to nothing but cinders and ash. The inferno that I created within those walls was more than any mortal fire brigade could handle. In the end, the fire had to burn itself out, exhausting any and all fuel that it could consume. I sat on a nearby hillside with my two companions, staring out at the smoldering ruins of the once feared building. I could hear their thoughts in my head. Amar worried for my wellbeing, Max was terrified of the level of my wrath and vengeance. But he would never understand. He had never felt the pull of a human who called to you.

I sat in sorrow, the loss confounding me but bringing clarity to my being. She was gone, my Beatrice was gone and it was time for me to go home.


	6. America

Chapter 6

America

Walking through the cold streets of Chicago, I found myself alone once again. Recently arriving back in America, it was an astonishing sight to behold the Statue of Liberty welcoming me home. It had Been one hundred forty years since I was home. I didn't know if I would even be returning here if not for the war. When Germany invaded France in August of 1914, I knew that my time in Europe was done. The battles were waging all over Europe and every country was being forced to choose a side. If I had stayed I would have Been forced to choose a side, we all would have. The humans would have looked upon us as able bodied men who could fight, but I wasn't fighting for the humans. When the fighting began it was astonishing to see that the Others that survived my vengeance all of those years ago, joined the Germans. They found it liberating to be able to take lives at will without much difficulty. Their speed and unique skills gave them the ability to feed and then they hid the bodies among the mass graves being dug to deal with the causalities of war. No one seemed to care if these 'people' were never to be found during the day.

The Others that survived stayed away from Paris for a long time, afraid I would exact my revenge on them as I did to the rest of their coven. But they couldn't stay gone for long, their hunger and need to be near to the humans was far greater than my wrath.

Once the building burned and nothing was left, I became a recluse. I only emerged when the hunger was far too great to ignore, but even then I took no joy from taking what I needed from the throngs of human livestock that walked the city streets. I used my powers of persuasion to bring them to me, the need for the hunt was gone. I knew there was no way I could replicate what I found in Beatrice and the drive to try washed away from me quickly.

Over time I became so menacing that Max and Amar became afraid to cross me. My ominous mood only seemed to enhance my abilities and make me stronger. Either that, or the constant desire to burn down the world to make myself feel better made me stronger. Either way, my constant threats on Max's behavior and indulgence caused him to finally leave us. Neither of us knew where he went, but I didn't believe Amar cared and I certainly didn't care. I didn't care about much really. I moved through life in a miserable gloom, brooding over my loss. The interesting thing, I never really knew the creature that bewitched me. I only knew that her body called to mine. It needed me as much as I needed hers and no other creature in the past hundred forty years or before has called to me in such a way.

After Max left us, tensions began to rise between Amar and myself. My desire to return to America was a constant problem. He believed me to be irrational and selfish for desiring to leave him, I believed him to be acting as an overbearing lover. In the end, when the war began in Europe we both agreed that it was time for us to leave France. When Germany declared war on France and it was clear that all of that part of Europe would be enthralled in a battle that neither of us had any desire to fight, so we left. Amar's desire was to return to his home in Italy. He wanted me to go along with him, but I wanted away from Europe, the fighting, the war, and especially away from the memory of my loss. In the end, Amar and I parted ways. He returned to Italy and I to America.

After arriving to America, I decided to stay in New York for several years, moving from place to place. It was easy to be anonymous in a place that big. I needn't encounter any others like myself and none of them desired to encounter me. Although I knew they were there and that some knew of my presence, we remained out of each other's way. Regardless of the anonymity and abundance of human livestock, the desire to move along was calling to me. I hadn't felt something call to me like that in many years. I frequently felt the pull of people whose blood called to me, but never a place. I traveled west sticking to larger cities that could afford me the anonymity that I desired. When I arrived in Chicago, I remained for many years. Something about that town called to me, lead me to that place. I had yet to encounter any others like me, but I was sure they were near. I could feel them, hear them in my thoughts. Just like the Others, they hid within the shadows but unlike the Others, these did not seem to be able to sense me. So I roamed and I fed without a purpose.

I moved along through the busy streets, taking in my surroundings. I had yet to discover what about this city called to me. But I had a feeling it had more to do with the beings that lived there than the city itself. For the past couple nights I had encountered several creatures, they observed me from a distance, watching and seemingly waiting. I had caught glimpses of their thoughts when they got close enough and from what I gathered, they were unsure about me but they didn't seem to be a threat. The humans in this town were an interesting sort. They were manipulative. The powerful were the most immoral. The streets were teeming with corrupt government officials and criminals who believed themselves to be above the law. I felt the future for this place would be a bloody one.

Out of the corner of my eye I could see the group that had Been observing me for months. Their thoughts told me that they were debating on if they should approach me or not. So instead of waiting for them to decide, I made the decision for them. I had allowed them to observe and follow me for months now, it was now time for me to take the initiative.

I moved into the shadows and evaporated into the mist, reappearing behind them. When they realized that I was there they hissed and a few of them cowered. One stepped forward to me. He was shorter than I, less than six feet tall. His normally bronze skin had a pale sheen to it and dark brown eyes sparkled with danger. He had a mischievous face but malice radiated from his every pore. He smirked at me, a challenge emanating from him. I could read his every thought. He was the alpha in this group and he saw my presence as a threat. This was a young group, they had Been around less than fifty years. They were but fledglings.

"I am not a threat to you, young one," I told him.

"I'm not afraid of you. You do not worry me."

"Yes, I do. I can read your thoughts and the thoughts of your clan. But you have nothing to worry about. I mean you no harm."

I projected my will on him. I wanted him to relax, I did not wish to take on this group. Battles between beings of equal strength was rare but terrifying, this battle would be over before they even realized. They would be no match for my superior age, speed, and strength. I projected what I wanted him to know of me, my age, my strength, and my desire to be left alone. When he realized what I was doing and that he was seeing what I wanted him to see, a look of terror and bewilderment crossed his face.

"How are you doing that?"

"I want you to know that I am not a threat to you. You also must know that I am not from here and only arrived back in America with the start of fighting throughout Europe. I did not desire to be involved in their battles."

His confusion mounted with every image that I projected. I used my power to calm him and the rest of the group. But then something occurred to me. These were young vampires, where was the one that made them.

"Where is the one that made you? He should have taught you about the powers that some of us possess."

"The one that made me was killed years ago. He was weak, he surrounded himself with those more powerful than himself but acted as though he was the alpha. One challenged him, and he met his demise."

I nodded in understanding. I was always more powerful than Max, the difference was he didn't try to dominate me. I took in the crew in front of me, there were three males and two females. The one that stepped up to me, seemed to be the strongest of this group. I was sure, together, they could wreak havoc on the humans.

In his thoughts I could hear him running though his options. He believed himself dominant to me, especially with his coven behind him. He believed together they would be able to overpower me. He didn't understand that I killed almost a hundred vampires on my own the night I went after the Others. I killed most with fire, but there were still probably twenty or thirty more that I ran through with my sword. The five of them were nothing compared to what I did in Paris all of those years ago.

I allowed images of that night to flash through my brain and projected them to the five young vampires standing before me. The females immediately cowered at the images, knowing full well that they are not fallacy. The alpha looked at me, astonished that I would allow something so personal to pass through to them.

"Was that all true?" he asked after a few moments.

"You know the answer to that young vampire. I may not be asserting my dominance, but do not let that mislead you. I have no desire to dominate anyone, but I will not allow you to harm me in any way. I wish only to continue on my path."

"Do you desire a truce then? A friendship?"

"I do not wish to join your coven, if that is what you are asking. I also do not wish to travel with you. But I will not back away from you if we should cross paths."

"What is your name and where are you originally from? And where is the one that made you?"

"My name is Tobias. I lived in New Orleans in the later 1700s. Max and I decided that it was no longer to our best interest to continue on together. We parted ways around fifty years ago." I did not know what became of Max after he left Amar and me. He may have returned to England, found another place in Europe, or even returned to America. "Would you care to provide me with the same courtesy of your names?"

"I am Zeke," the alpha said. "That one there is my brother, Uriah," he said pointing to one of the other males. The brothers resembled each other greatly, they both had Marlene complexions much like Amar and both had laughing eyes. Uriah was taller than Zeke and thinner. "The female standing next to Uriah is Marlene. Next to her is William, and finally this one is Shauna," he said indicating each vampire in turn. Marlene was fair skinned with light brown hair and brown eyes, Shauna had golden brown eyes, brown/auburn hair, and fair skin, and William had long dark brown hair and bright green eyes. They all appeared to have Been pretty young when they were turned.

"How did siblings get turned?" I asked.

Zeke took me in, a look of annoyance and fury crossing his mischievous eyes. "Our father was turned. He went on a rampage through our house when the five of us were there working on the farm. He took me first. Instead of killing me though, he decided he would turn me. He believed that if he turned me that I would have to be tied to him forever. He then did the same to Uriah and the others. Little did he know, that in my mortal twenty years I had already grown weary of him. We stayed together for around ten years before I decided it was time to assert my dominance. I was sick of his demands. So one night after feeding, I returned to find him drunk off of two whores. He demanded I dispose of the bodies.

"I took them out to the barn and placed them into a pile, covered them with fuel, and ignited it. Then I went back inside, fury burning through me at having to dispose of his mess again. I took him, slit his throat, and placed him on the pile with his whores. I watched him burn, turn to nothing but ash along with the barn."

I nodded in understanding. I understood that kind of fury.

"Well young ones, I must move on now," I began. But the one called Uriah stepped forward.

"What if we need you? How can we find you?"

Zeke glared at his brother. He did not want to appear needy, but I could hear and feel their desires as if they were speaking them aloud. The common thing with this little group was that they were young, they were lost, and they desired guidance. They desired the answers that I needed all those years ago and I was the only creature around old enough to provide those answers to them.

"Don't worry young one, I will be around. Something in this place calls to me. I don't know if it is you or if it is the city itself, but I will not be moving on from here for a while. We will meet again, soon. But for now, I must feed."

Without another word, I faded into the shadows.


	7. Bea

Chapter 7

Bea

Over the next few years the small group and I became companions. I provided them with the answers and guidance that they sought and they helped me to blend in more with the mortals. A lot had changed from the 1780's to the 1920's. The biggest change and seemingly the most dangerous was prohibition. The feeling that I received about a bloody future for this city came to fruition with the passing of prohibition in 1920. The mortals were angry and began to take matters into their own hands. They began to rebel against the law and there were a lot of police that turned their head for the payouts that the mobs were providing for them. Everyone knew where the speakeasies were and where the liquor was being made but no one really did anything about it. And the ones that tried ended up dead.

The twenties in America was a lot different than what I'd seen in my life. The women became more open and began wearing less clothing. The men still wanted to dominate, but they didn't seem to mind the change in women so much, at least not the women in the speakeasies. Women were working outside of the home more and had more freedom to do as they pleased. The thing that really surprised me was that men didn't act much different, even with the women behaving differently.

Zeke's crew and I made a habit of going to the speakeasies in and around Chicago. I found that I quite enjoyed the taste of the alcohol that they served in these places, especially when it was combined with the blood of a mortal. Drunken mortals were easy pickings for the likes of us.

The date was October 7, 1924. Zeke and I followed the crew into a speakeasy that we rarely frequented near the pier. Zeke had a way in to almost anywhere we wanted to go. I found over the past eight years that Zeke's dominant power was influence. He could influence any human to do his bidding. It was quite impressive to watch. Where my powers of persuasion dealt with the subconscious and mind control, his influence dealt more with convincing the mortal that what he was telling them was their idea. He was able to get any human to do anything that he wanted. He had managed to convince every speakeasy in the area that he was someone of importance, so they provided us entrance without incident.

We entered the room and it was humming with music, alcohol, and flappers. These women wore little clothing and were always looking to entertain men. They were flamboyant and easy targets for men and vampires alike.

Sitting at the bar, trying to decide who my target would be for that night, I felt a familiar pull. It was a feeling that I hadn't felt in many years, not since my Beatrice was killed all those years ago. I searched the room, trying to find what was causing this feeling inside of me. It couldn't possibly be her, she was dead. The Others ripped her apart, they were brutal with her, leaving little left of the flesh that covered her. The thought of what they did to her still haunted me years later.

But then I saw her, a beautiful dark brown haired woman, serving drinks. Her face was different, this girl looked older than Beatrice was. Her body was more proportionate, she was more filled out than the girl in Paris. But I was sure she was the same girl. She was definitely not a vampire and most certainly was human, I could hear her heartbeat from across the room I could feel every breath she took as if she were standing next to me. I could hear the rush of blood through her veins, calling out to me to take her. Just like Beatrice, her body called to me and for the second time in my immortal life I could feel the pull from her body. It called for me to take it in every way a man could take a woman. But how could she be the same girl if she was mortal? I knew Beatrice was dead and I also knew that this girl most certainly had a heartbeat.

I walked over and sat in an empty booth in her section. If this was my Beatrice, and I was sure it was, there was no way I was letting her get away. The difference this time however was that I didn't just want to consume her as I had in Paris, I wanted her as mine. I was going to turn her, to make her mine forever. I think that was what I really wanted of Beatrice also, but I didn't understand that then.

Zeke and the others followed me and piled into the booth. I sat on the end to ensure that I would be able to talk to her. I needed to find a way to feel her skin, to touch her. The pull of her body on mine was scary but sensual. The carnal need I had for her was more than I had felt since Beatrice.

I watched her move about the room, smiling and talking to all those she encountered. She was pleasant and seemed quite happy, but her inner thoughts betrayed that. She was miserable. She was the sole provider for her family. Her father had died not long ago. He had been a mobster and someone took out a hit on him. Chicago in the twenties was full of mobsters vying for territory. Her father was a notorious criminal who spent his time killing those who crossed him or sleeping around with various women. He was a bad father and a bad husband, but he had provided for them. Now that he was gone, her mother was a wreck and this girl was responsible for providing for her family.

She walked toward the table with a huge smile on her face. But when she looked into my eyes, the smile faded. She stared into my eyes, as if she could read my thoughts, and maybe she could. My mother had abilities, as did I before I was turned. I was sure Beatrice was an innocent, but I was unsure of her abilities, so it was possible that this girl could have some ability as well.

"Umm… Hi, welcome to Smokies. What can I get you all?" she asked without ever breaking eye contact with me.

"We will all take whatever you have on tap," Zeke said.

"What is your name?" I asked, breaking myself out of my trance. She was beautiful, more beautiful than any other creature that I ever encountered before. Her beauty shown from within, her outer looks could have been lacking but she would still be incredibly beautiful. But this girl was both beautiful inside and out.

She shook her head and glanced at my companions, but then she turned her attention back to me. "My name is Bea. And you?"

"Bea? What a beautiful name," I said. An utterly strange feeling taking over my senses. "Is that short for something?"

"No, it's just Bea," she looked into my eyes and I was mesmerized by her simplistic beauty and her unordinary eyes. They were violet with specks of gold through them, exactly like Beatrice. When she spoke again I was completely enthralled with her. "I don't think I have ever seen you all around here before."

"No, we don't frequent the pier," Zeke said. "But we just may have to come around more often," he finished looking from Bea to me and back again.

"It is nice to meet you, Bea," Uriah said with a smile. "I am Uriah. This is Zeke, Marlene, William, and Shauna. And that is Tobias."

She smiled, "It is nice to meet you all." Then she looked directly at me and smiled, "Tobias." It was a smile that I was sure would restart my heart and bring me back from immortality. Her body was screaming for me to take her and all I could think about was taking her body and using it for every sexual desire that I have ever had. And then I wanted to taste every fluid her body had to offer. Everything she had to offer needed to be mine, forever.

I projected thoughts of us together, doing things to one another that would make even a seasoned prostitute blush. And when she saw these images in her head, images that she thought were all her own, she blushed. The blood rushing to her face and neck almost made me want to take her right there. But I couldn't and wouldn't. I needed to make her want me as much as I wanted her. She felt the attraction. Her body wanted me, it desired me and called for me to take it, but she didn't know or understand why. Even more now than before, I was sure this was my Beatrice. I had no idea how, but it was her.

"I should… umm… I should go get your drinks. I'll be right back."

When she was gone, my companions sat and gaped at me. "What was that all about? You never pay attention to humans," Zeke asked.

"Yeah, and it was like she was ready to pounce on you and take you right here," Uriah continued.

"If the sexual tension got any higher, I was going to have to take Uriah right here and now," Marlene said, with a wink.

They all laughed, but I said nothing. I just watched as the girl walked across the room to gather our drinks. I couldn't believe it was her, I couldn't believe she was here. But I didn't understand it. It was times like this that I wished Amar were still around. He would understand and explain it to me. Maybe I should send for him to come to America. He would fit right in with the Chicago mafia.

~oOo~

Every day for a week I returned to Smokies to see Bea. And every day she became more and more willing to open up to me. We spent time talking between customers. I told her that I was from New Orleans and that I spent a considerable amount of time in Europe, of course she didn't know what century this all happened. She told me about her family and of her father's death. She told me of her mother's depression and how she had to support her siblings. She decided the best thing to do was to work in a speakeasy. The people paid well and she could work when she wanted.

I wondered if my Beatrice would have Been this open to talking to me. But that didn't seem to really matter because when I was with Bea, I didn't think about that time so long ago. I felt like I was with her, getting a second chance to really get to know her. I hadn't spent this much time with a human since I was human myself. But the mental and physical desire I had to be with this girl over powered any sense I had. The idea of just simply feeding off of her wasn't enough. I had to taste her, I had to have all of her. I wanted her, mind, body, and soul for my own. I wanted to devour everything about her and keep her as mine. But in order to do that, I needed her to give her body to me willingly. That kind of need required a level of intimacy that I had never achieved, not even in my humanity.

I knew she could feel her body being drawn to mine. I knew she felt the pull that our bodies created when they were near, like they were opposite poles on magnets drawing each other together. I knew she felt the need to be near me, to be with me. I could read it in her thoughts, her desires, her need, her confusion about why she felt this way for me. She didn't understand it, but she didn't fight it either. She was drawn to me and she embraced it, even if she didn't understand it. The fact of the matter was, I wasn't sure I understood it either. Something about her called to me. Sure she was lovely and she was sweet, but I had no idea what it was about Beatrice or Bea that called to me. Something in them, something about them recognized me and I them. I only hoped that when the time came, she would be open to really giving herself to me and then maybe we could explore this connection together to understand what it was and what it meant.

Every day, she spent time with me between customers. We would talk about everything and nothing at all. We never really had any physical contact, we just talked and laughed and enjoyed each other's company. I wasn't sure I ever had this kind of connection to anyone in my life. No friend, not even my mother made me laugh and actually enjoy life like Bea did. She almost made me forget what I was. She didn't see the monster before her, she only saw a man. Maybe this was the man I was supposed to be. Maybe this was the man that I would have Been if my father hadn't controlled and destroyed my life. I was getting a glimpse into another part of me that I never knew existed. A good man, a better man than I ever was. Bea was the catalyst of this behavior and I never wanted to give her up.

After work, she started to let me walk her home just before dawn. One special night she took my hand in hers and allowed me hold her hand and feel her soft, supple skin against mine. The connection of flesh made me want her even more. I loved the feel of her skin against mine. I wanted her body flush with mine. I wanted to feel every peak and valley that her body had to offer. Any thought of carnal pleasure seemed to be out of the question, however. She, much like Beatrice, was an innocent. She was pure and sweet, in spite of the sadness that she harbored deep inside of herself because of the lot she drew in this life. But I could remedy that with time.

When I finally decided that I was going to take steps to seduce her and make her mine no matter what, I couldn't wait to get to Smokies. We had spent a few weeks talking and getting to know each other and now it was time for me to make strides to change the direction of our friendship. I didn't know when I would need to move on from this place, all I knew was that when that time came, I would do everything I could to take her with me. She was my missing piece. I felt complete around her, like a part was missing that I never knew was missing. I knew that once I got her to choose to be with me, her sadness would subside. She would no longer be slave to her family. I would take steps to either have them taken care of financially or would have my cohorts take care of them in other ways. Either way, she would be free of the ties that bind her to this life.

When I arrived at Smokies, I was met with fire trucks, ambulances, and police cars. I immediately felt desperation take over my mind and body. Every possible scenario raced through my head as I approached the scene. I could feel and hear all of the jumbled thoughts of the emergency workers and it was difficult to sift through their thoughts. Whatever happened here was destructive, of that I was positive. All I could think was, not again. There was a drug store as the front for the speakeasy, maybe it was the drug store that was the problem. Maybe Bea was hiding in the back with everyone else waiting for the all clear that the authorities were gone. Maybe she was just waiting for me to come and save her. I needed to get to her, but first I had to know what was happening.

When I approached the scene, I was stopped by a police officer. Reading his thoughts, I knew he was one of the good ones. He couldn't be bought by the mobs and gangsters. He was a lone wolf among the pack. "How can I help you tonight sir?" he asked me.

"I am here to collect my prescription and purchase a few other things. Is everything okay? Burt wasn't hurt, was he?" Burt was the drug store owner, and one of the only humans that I had never considered taking. He knew how to keep his mouth shut and how to make himself scarce when it would benefit him the most. He also looked out for Bea. I knew he worried for her.

"Burt is fine and will reopen tomorrow. Until then, it would be best for you to leave," the officer said.

"Well, if Burt is okay then what is happening?"

"Nothing of your concern, move along."

I took a moment and read everything he would give me. I also picked up on several others thoughts. When I realized what had happened, everything in me stopped. Stepping into the shadows, I moved into Smokies and took in the carnage. From what I got from the police officer, one of the rival gangs in the area came in and shot up the place. They came in with their Thompson Submachine guns and started shooting everything. Once everyone that was in front of them was dead or dying, they started shooting the walls and anywhere that they thought might have a hiding place for people to crawl into. No one walked out of there alive.

I stayed to the shadows, keeping in my mist form looking. Hoping more than I'd ever hoped that she wasn't here. She didn't always work, but knowing that I was going to be here tonight, she may have come.

When I saw them move a small dark brown haired girl from behind the stage, I knew instantly it was her. Her heartbeat was erratic, and they were attempting to work on her. I stepped from the shadows, not caring at all about who saw me and what they were going to do to me. I rushed to her side. She was alive, but barely.

"What happened here? What happened to her?" I demanded of the paramedics. They stared at me, unsure of what to do. "Don't just stand there, help her."

"Sir, how did you get in here?"

"Is she going to be okay?" I asked, ignoring his question.

He sighed, realizing that he wasn't going to get me away until he answered my questions. "There was shooting. It seems that several people came in here with Tommy guns and shot everyone that moved. She has Been shot multiple times in her chest, stomach, and legs. I'm sorry, but the likely hood of her surviving is slim," he told me. He placed the oxygen over her face, but she turned her head. Her eyes opened to slits and I could see her beautiful violet eyes looking at me. It was times like this that tears would be useful. The overload of emotion that I felt was excruciating. She took in a ragged breath and let it out before she whispered to me. I could hear it in her thoughts and in her voice.

"I'm s…sorry, Tobias." And that was all she said before her last breath expelled from her body and she was gone. Her heartbeat, her blood coursing through her veins, everything that was Bea was now gone.

I stood and left the speakeasy, enraged at the senseless murder of fifty or more innocents. But especially enraged about the loss of Bea. I've lost her twice now. I thought being forced into this life was enough. Now I've lost the love of a lifetime twice. There was no way I'd get a third chance to make that creature mine. There was no hope for me now.

~oOo~

Two days later, following Bea's funeral, Zeke, Uriah, Marlene, William, Shauna, and I all walked into the home of one of the most notorious gangsters in Chicago, known as Papa John. The six of us took our time and devoured each and every one of his men that were there. I took enjoyment from ripping their throats out and taking every last ounce of their blood. I found the man that called for the hit on the speakeasy. He was asleep in his bed with a young woman draped over him. I took my time with both of them. First I showed him what I was going to do to him by using his whore as an example. I made her scream and cry with every bite, and I enjoyed it more than I ever realized. Then when I was finished with her, I turned to Papa John himself. I made him scream until he could no longer scream. I forced him to feel the pain of all of the people that he'd killed over the years. I brought back every form of punishment that he used on others and inflicted my own on him as well. When I was finally ready to take his life completely, he was begging for death. Zeke and Uriah took in the brutality that I inflicted on these humans. I know I showed them what I was capable of through projections, but seeing it seemed to affect them even more. But they didn't hesitate, they followed my lead and by the time we were ready to go, everyone in the house and on the grounds were dead. By the time we were done, there was nothing left of a majority of them. We gutted them and placed them about the house, as a message to everyone. Although we all knew that the humans would believe that a rival gang did this, we still knew that it would be known that this was revenge for what happened at Smokies. They didn't need know that it was my revenge for losing Bea. I got what I wanted out of the killing.

I didn't understand how could this creature come into my life twice and twice be ripped from my grasp? After all of this, I decided it was time for a trip to Italy to find my old friend and guide, Amar.


	8. Questions and Answers

Hey all, thanks for reading! Please don't forget that this is a REAL novel with ORIGINAL characters that is on sale now on all e-book retailer sites. Please, check out my story "The Becoming", by Shelly Davis.

Chapter 8

Questions and Answers

It took more than a year to secure passage from America to Europe for the group of us. I meant to go alone, but Zeke and Uriah would not allow it. They had become quite the companions. They were nothing like Max. He was pompous and worried about his status more than surviving. Zeke and Uriah cared nothing about status. They enjoyed the chase, but didn't make an ordeal out of the whole thing and they were loyal, almost to a fault. Over the years I found that these two would defend the rest of us with their lives if necessary.

Being the first time that the five of them were leaving America, I had to make sure that they understood what would happen on the ship. Since six of us were traveling, vermin may not be enough to sustain us for the voyage. After vermin, I explained that we would look for the weak or sick. We didn't want anyone looking too closely into our behaviors.

So the six of us boarded a ship in New York, waiting for our two week voyage across the ocean, to Europe. From there I would allow my connection with Amar to lead me to him.

The voyage was uneventful, so much easier than it had Been a hundred years ago when I made the trip the first time. Modern technology made the trip half the time than it was before and much more comfortable. A vampire could easily survive on vermin alone in two weeks. Unlike my first trip when it took a month or more to cross the Atlantic.

When we departed the ship in England, images of a time long ago came flooding back to me. We stayed in England for fourteen months, searching for Amar, acclimating to European ways, and enjoying the sights. It was quite the adventure for my companions. They needed the time to learn European ways and to relax.

Fourteen months after we arrived in England, we made our way to France. Visions of the Others and what they did to my Beatrice kept taking over my thoughts as we traveled. It was hard to focus on anything else. I was immediately drawn to Notre Dame and the place where I found Beatrice's lifeless body near the convent. The imprints of those dark days still haunted these streets and buildings. I could also see the horrifying visions of battles and war on every cobblestone and every brick that held this city together. The Eifel Tower was still stained with blood and gunpowder, they would be forever ingrained in the steel that made the tower so stable. The blood of soldiers and innocents alike haunted this place. The images so strong that I wouldn't be surprised if humans could pick up on the energy left behind.

We roamed France and other European countries for years. The World War ravaged this land and every building, street, and pasture that we encountered. I felt as though I was there, seeing the fighting, death, and destruction first hand. The imprints so powerful that even Zeke could pick up on them in many places. When he got his first glimpse it terrified him and he refused to leave the hotel for days. When he found that I saw these things all of the time, he thought me mad for being able to continue like nothing was happening. But as he found, it was like I could see the battles as they were happening right in front of me. The imprints of everything occurring over and over in history, bleeding though to my present.

But what he didn't understand was that my abilities had progressed over the years. I hadn't noticed how much until arriving back in Europe, but I found I no longer saw only the past, I could see the future also. Much like being able to see the blood that ended up covering Chicago all of those years ago, I could see what was in store for this area. Another war was coming, and it wasn't that far into the future. This land would barely be able to heal when the next war ravaged it. And the coming war would be far worse than the last was on this land. It would stretch farther and be more destructive than any war in the past.

When it was clear that neither Amar nor Max were in this part of Europe, it was time to move south to Italy. My companions and I traveled to Italy, journeying through the beautiful Italian country. But as soon as we entered the country, I was immediately drawn to the southernmost portion of the country, to Calabria. Years we roamed Northern Europe, and all of this time Amar was still in his home.

Upon arrival in Calabria, I could see why Amar was so desperate to return to this place. Surrounded by beautiful blue seas and a perfect climate, the place was wonderful.

"You came to Chicago, instead of coming here?" Marlene asked when we arrived.

I snickered at her, "Well, how was I to know that this place was this beautiful."

Just at that moment, I got the familiar feeling that Amar was near. Knowing him, he knew I was going to arrive before I even knew. I smiled and turned toward the direction that I knew he was standing. I almost forgot the kind of connection that Amar and I had.

When he came out of the shadows, he looked exactly as I remembered him. His clothes were more modern, but everything else was exactly the same. He glanced over me, taking in my appearance before looking over my companions.

"Hello young one. You have brought guests? And who might these fledglings be?"

Zeke scowled while Uriah, William, and the girls looked at the elder vampire in awe. I told them of Amar's age and wisdom, so they were not surprised by the way he talked. Zeke was just protective and didn't take well to new beings.

Amar smiled at Zeke, "Don't worry young one, I will not cause you harm. If you are friends with Tobias, then you are my friend as well. Besides, I already know you are a good one. I can read your thoughts and see it in you. You cannot hide anything from me."

Zeke looked to me, "Do all you old guys read minds. You know it is really kind of bothersome."

Amar and I both smirked at the younger vampire, "No, not all have this ability. We are different than most. But don't worry, Amar will stay out of your head, just as I do."

"Yes, young one. It gets very tiresome constantly hearing what others are thinking. I only use it when it is beneficial to me. Such as this moment." Then he turned to me, "We must talk of this young woman. I feel that this is vital information. Come, all of you. We will return to my home. Do any of you, other than Tobias, have the ability to enter the sunlight? If so, I simply must show you Calabria at dawn, it is quite beautiful."

"Tobias can go out in the sunlight?" William asked. "I never knew that."

"Neither did I," Marlene said.

"It is not something that I choose to do regularly."

"You must be quite strong to venture out into the sunlight without being killed," Uriah said.

"Yes, young one. Tobias is quite extraordinary. We can discuss these things at my home. Dawn is approaching and I wouldn't want to lose any of you."

We all followed Amar back to his home. When we entered, I found that all of the windows had dark coverings that wouldn't allow any light in at all. The house was the perfect haven for vampires. "Please, come in. Make yourselves at home. We can remain here until this evening. After that, I can show you wonderful places around southern Italy. I almost forgot how much I loved my home here."

When the group settled in for the day, I made my way out to the veranda on the back of the house facing the sea. With dawn rising soon, the grounds were silent. Once I realized that I could withstand sunlight, this was always my favorite time of the day. Morning just before and at dawn. It was quiet and peaceful. Humans typically weren't out yet to disturb the perfection and vampires were going to sleep for the night. It was like this time of the day was meant just for me.

"I also enjoy it, not that I've had someone to share it with for a long time," Amar said from behind me. "Tell me, my friend, what brings you to my home? I can only imagine that you were seeking me for some reason."

"I have Been searching for you. As you mentioned, we must talk of the young woman. I am troubled by her reappearance."

Amar looked at me with concern, "Come Tobias, let us enjoy the beautiful dawn. You can tell me what is happening from there."

I followed him down the beautiful, quiet beach to a spot that could only be described in a dream. I had never seen the likes of such a place and words couldn't describe its beauty and perfection. I never knew such places existed on Earth or anywhere else. How could places of such beauty exist when the devastation that we had seen in the north wasn't so far away? And it was coming again soon.

"What do you see for the future of these lands, my young friend?"

"Another world wide war is coming. Actually it has already begun. But soon this one will ravage not only Europe, but America. This will truly be a world war. The leader of your beautiful country will soon decide to involve himself with taking over other countries."

"I feared this was coming. It seems that after the last war, these humans were not happy with the results. They will attempt to take over everything, won't they?"

I nodded, I couldn't see the results of the war at that time, but the destruction and devastation on the land and on human life would be catastrophic.

"But this is not the reason you have come back to me. Tell me of this young woman in America and what she has to do with the woman in France."

"I am convinced they are one in the same. But she was alive. She wasn't a vampire, she was most certainly mortal. I could hear her heartbeat, her blood rushing though her veins. I could smell her, every aspect of her, just like the woman in France. And the attraction was the same. But most importantly I recognized her. Not her face as much as something else about her. I knew her, knew it was the same woman. But surprisingly she also seemed to recognize me in some way."

Amar took in everything that I said and sat silently for a long time. Even after all this time, it still astounded me to see how unchanging we truly were. His perfect looks were exactly the same. His dark hair and warm eyes held no visage of age. You could sense his age and experience by the way he looked at you. He flawlessly changed with the times, moving and changing the way he dressed based on the way the humans changed. Our silence stretched through the dawn of a new day. By the time he was ready to speak, the sun had crested and began to peak over the crystal blue sea. The reflection of the yellows and oranges dancing off of the deep blue sea was something awe inspiring. I had never seen such beauty or perfection in my life.

"It is quite beautiful, isn't it? Most humans don't bother to see such things in their lifetime. They move through as if the beauty of nature doesn't exist. It saddens me that the beings that walk this planet don't bother to take in everything it has to offer. But enough about that." He stopped as if he was thinking more, about what I could only imagine.

"You said her face wasn't really the same but you recognized something in her? I believe what you recognized and what was calling to you was her spirit or her aura."

"What?"

"Her aura, it is a field that surrounds people and places. It is no wonder that you would be able to pick up on auras, it is what probably helps you to see the past and future of places."

"But how could two different people have the same aura?"

"I don't believe that these two women are two completely different people, but the same woman in two different bodies. They call it reincarnation. Over my lifetime I have seen evidence of reincarnation many times. When a person dies, they are reborn into another body. How many years had it Been between Beatrice and this other woman?"

"Around twenty years or more."

"Then the idea of her having the same aura and being reincarnated makes sense. I believe that is what is happening. This girl is being reincarnated and when she is of age, her aura begins calling out to you for you to come to her. How long has it Been since she died in Chicago?"

I thought about what he was telling me, could this woman really be the same and could she really call out to me like that? "It has Been about ten years since Chicago. She died in 1925."

"Well if I am correct, in about five to ten years you should begin to feel drawn to a place for no real reason. There you will probably encounter another woman that you recognize. Tell me, did she seem to recognize you?"

"Yes, she did."

"She could be a sensitive, or have powers of her own. Until then, you will stay with me. You and your companions will enjoy what Italy has to offer." There was no question or discussion about our staying with him, it was assumed. I felt stronger around Amar, I didn't realize how badly I missed him and how much I wished to return to him. His ancient aura fueled me and gave me strength that I didn't have when I wasn't around him.

We stayed in Italy with Amar. My young companions were more than willing to spend their time there learning from the oldest vampire any of us had ever encountered. He provided each of them with the same type of guidance and strength that he provided to me. He taught them about themselves and their strengths and helped me to further mine as well. We all lived happily in his home like a family. I enjoyed feeling like I was part of a family and our little family became a stronger unit than ever before.

I once heard Zeke and Uriah ask Amar questions about me and the wrath they saw in Chicago and the projection that I showed them from Paris. They told him of the fear that they held but of the unwavering loyalty they held also. When Amar spoke, I was both moved and struck speechless.

"My young friends, my Tobias has a lot of feeling within him that even he doesn't know. He feels the weight of all of humanity on his shoulders. His gift is a terrible one for most, but Tobias does well reigning in the bombardment of feelings and emotions that he is overrun with on a daily basis. But when he taps into that emotion, it can fuel and drive him to unparalleled strength. So far he has Been able to restrain it and keep control of it. I fear the day he loses that tenuous control that he has. If that day were to ever come, all of humanity could be at risk. But I have faith that Tobias can control the power he has inside."

Uriah and Zeke both nodded and neither of them responded. But I could hear their thoughts. They feared I would lose control, but they trusted that I wouldn't. They also both believed that it wouldn't be them that would see my wrath, but it would be humanity that would suffer.

We remained with Amar, but by 1940, the world and Italy were yet again involved in a world war. It was becoming more and more difficult to stay out of the fighting. When they called for all able bodied men to join, we had little choice but to choose a side.

By 1943 the Italians were in the midst of a civil war while also engaged in the Second World War. While the Germans occupied the north, the south was associated with the Allies and fighting against communism. My companions and I found it very difficult to remain out of the war as we did during the First World War. Bombings were happening everywhere and my visions of global participation in this war were more accurate than I could have ever imagined.


	9. Her Eyes, Her Soul

Chapter 9

Her Eyes, Her Soul

1944 found us all in the British Royal Navy in the Atlantic. Battles had Been waging in the Atlantic for years between the Allies and the Axis forces. We managed to stay below the radar for a long time but some force, something unexplainable called me back to northern Europe and Great Britain in late 1943. So Zeke, Uriah, William, Amar, and I all volunteered for night shifts on ships circling the Atlantic. It was the job of these ships to ensure the shipment of supplies from America. We were a welcomed addition to the crew because of preferred nocturnal behavior. No one questioned why this was our preference as they were happy to have a break from it. Shauna and Marlene both took jobs as nurses in Great Britain. The separation was difficult, but we all had a job to do.

We spent much time fighting and defending supply ships from being sunk by German U-Boats. Our heightened eyesight and hearing became our greatest assets throughout the nights. We were able to hear the U-Boats and German submarines before anyone else. With the night waters being almost black, the five of us were able to do the unheard of by identifying and stopping several attacks before supply ships were lost.

We learned many things about ourselves over the months. We learned that we could each go about three days before we absolutely had to feed. This was great information when the rodents ran out and we had to begin to feed off of our fellow soldiers. We found that we could survive also on sharing victims. Two of us could feed on one victim at a time, but this still amounted to too many deaths. We also found that Uriah, William, and Zeke had grown a tolerance for being in the sun when our shift was extended during a brutal battle. They said the sun drained them of power, but they weren't caused any real damage because of it.

Throughout 1944, we saw little of dry land and of our female companions. The ships were remarkably devoid of rodents. The five of us had to limit ourselves to prisoners and the occasional crew member. We hid our kills by staging suicides. Slitting wrists was the preferred manner in which most of our victims seemingly perished. Instead of sinking our teeth into the jugular, we slit the wrists on our incapacitated victims and drank their blood in that manner. It was almost too easy for us. It was common knowledge that after a long period of time in the sea, many men would become depressed, suicidal, and would begin to question reality.

Between the suicides and the constant barrage of U-Boat attacks, the moral on the ship became very low. No one spoke of the frequent deaths that were severely weakening our force, but they all felt the weight of losing friends and co-workers. We had to play along with their sadness and melancholy so as not to raise any suspicion.

In early November of 1944, we were finally able to return to Great Britain for a leave. The field doctors assigned to our ship had declared that our crew had Been at sea too long after the fifteenth man seemingly killed himself. We were able to stay in Great Britain near our female counterparts because battles were waging all around. When news that one of Germany's favorite generals' committed suicide before the Allies could capture him, it was clear the war was turning. German officials were becoming scared of losing and being captured and the suicide of this specific general was a major hit to the Germans.

We saw so many battles and so much fighting over the months that it was frightening. It was a miracle that the group of us were able to stay together. That was until March of 1945. We were near Switzerland trying to stop German troops from destroying all of the bridges that spanned the Rhine River. As we progressed through, I became separated not only from my companions but from my entire company. As it became abundantly clear that I may never find them, I was surrounded by German troops. They shot me in the legs and took me back to their barracks to interrogate me. While there, I learned that American troops were able to stop the attack, which angered the Germans even more. So to make me suffer for their defeat, they took to many ways of torture. At first their torture was starvation and various types of deprivation. I was able to get what I needed from the other prisoners and vermin, but even that wouldn't always be enough.

They found new and inventive means of torture for me. Medieval methods of torture that I had only read about. The abuse they placed on my body was excruciating. They quickly became frustrated with my ability to heal myself in days. They knew something was off, but they didn't seem to know what that was. The more they abused me, the more I needed to feed in order to heal. It was a horrific experience. Until they brought in a nurse to run tests on me.

I knew it was her before they even brought her in. Before I even saw her I felt her, I knew instantly that it was her. My Beatrice. She had returned to me once again in the form of a German nurse. When she looked at me, confusion and nervousness were written across her face. She was quite beautiful, dark brown hair pulled into a tight bun at the nape of her neck, fair skin, slight figure, and beautiful violet eyes. That seemed to be a common factor with her, dark brown hair and violet eyes. Her features had Been different, but her eyes always called to me.

She stopped everything, staring at me. She stared into my eyes and seemed lost for a moment until one of the soldiers spoke to her.

"Nurse Betty , prepare him for testing," he commanded.

She shook herself out of her momentary stupor and set to her tasks. I was enthralled by her, watching her every movement. I was also astonished that her name was Betty , yet another variation of the original name.

I focused in on her thoughts and found that she was very nervous. She kept looking at me, thinking she knew me but also knowing that she couldn't possibly know me. She'd never met an American as far as she knew, in this lifetime at least. But she also knew that she was familiar with me, my face and especially my eyes. There must be something between the aura, the soul and the eyes that helped seal that familiarity.

When the soldier that told her to prep me left the room, she visibly relaxed a little. She looked at me, confusion and worry written across her face.

"How is it that I recognize an American soldier?" she asked in a strong German accent.

"Technically, you don't know me, Betty ," I told her. When she looked at me in confusion, I had to say the words in German so she understood.

"But you're familiar," she said, worry evident in her voice.

"I am familiar because you belong to me, Betty ."

"Be…lo…long?" she asked.

"Belong to me." I repeated myself in German to make her understand the words. "Belong," I said again. Taking her hand in mine and pulled her to me. I didn't know how the fates had brought us together in this place, in this time. I had a feeling that our love yet again would be doomed. There couldn't possibly be anything good that could come from this situation. I was an American soldier in a German torture chamber. She was an Austrian nurse working for the Germans, attending to the needs of those who had senselessly murdered thousands of people, including her family, just because of their religion and the way that they looked. The rest of her family, parents and a brother were killed when Germany took control Austria in 1938. She was unsure of what made them spare her life, but they did. They forced her to become a nurse and work for the German army.

Without another thought, I gripped her with more strength than I should have had and pulled her lips to mine. For forty years I had wanted to taste her lips on mine. To feel her body close to me. I couldn't help myself.

She let out a strangled squeak when I forcefully pressed my lips to hers, pulling her down on top of me. She had to know me, she had to see something in me because she didn't fight me. I kept her securely on me for a few more moments before I released her. The taste of her doing more to heal my ravaged body than any amount of blood could ever do.

When she stepped back, she looked at me with shock and wonder. She felt it too, she had to. She knew me, she wanted me. Maybe I could turn her and together we could escape this place and return to America. Just when I was ready to pull her to me and take her for mine, we were rejoined by the soldier. She set to work with the tests that she was supposed to run. Confusion crossing her face when she tried to feel for a pulse and hear my heartbeat.

My nervousness took over when she looked at me with fear in her eyes. She didn't understand what was happening, but I would make her. I would make her understand and make her chose me, chose to be mine. I had to give her the choice, right? I could just take her and turn her without her consent, she would forgive me when I made her understand all that there was between us and how long I had waited to feel her and taste her.

After she had run all of the tests asked of her, she was excused. I watched as she moved toward the door warily. She seemed uncomfortable and worried about something. Invading her mind I found her thoughts were totally on me and our connection. She didn't understand and I couldn't make her understand. She stopped and turned, looking at me, she whispered one word in English, "Belong" before exiting the room.

Time passed and I had no idea how much. I was ripped apart, tortured, cut, burned, stretched, and then provided with water to keep me alive. I was abused and then I healed, and they did it all again. I was in a room with no windows, so I had no indication of time and how it passed. I slept, they tortured me, and I slept some more. I took my sustenance from the rats that scurried about and from the other prisoners. I figured the death that I gave them was far more humane than the deaths that were promised to them.

I had not seen Betty since she left me. Every time the door opened I hoped that she was the one that entered. But it was never her. But then, after what seemed to be weeks or months, she finally returned to me. She came into where they were holding me and began to tend to my most recent injuries. I would heal, I always did. But these injuries were fresh and therefore looked much worse than they actually were. She continued to tend to her tasks, not looking at me or making any kind of contact at all. My hands and legs were bound and attached to today's torture device, making it impossible to touch her in any manner at all.

When she seemed to be done with her specified job, she hesitated before she finally made eye contact with me. When I finally could see her eyes, they were red and swollen. She had Been crying for some reason. Fury and helplessness raged through me as she stared into my eyes, searching for something. Her thoughts screamed at me, telling me that she knew me. She wanted me, needed me. But she couldn't do anything about it. She couldn't set me free, they'd kill us both. She was confused by my lack of pulse and heartbeat that she could discern. She was confused by her attraction, the fact that she knew in her heart that she knew me. She was terrified of them killing me. Most of all she was scared that she would never see me again. She feared for my life.

She leaned in and looked into my eyes. I wanted more than anything to touch her, talk to her, something. But they had me gagged on top of being restrained. She smiled slightly and pressed her lips to my cheek and then my bottom lip. She ran her fingers across my abdomen, which was currently stained with blood. She took a wet cloth and began a slow and torturous bathing of my body. She washed away all of the blood, touching just about every part of my body that was exposed to her. She slid her fingers over me, taking me in, memorizing my body. It was more torturous than anything the soldiers had done to me. It was a delicious feeling, having her touch me. I'd never felt more aware of another person, ever. Not Max, not Amar, no one. I could feel everything that she felt, I could hear her every thought, need, desire, and dream. I knew her deep in her core.

Just when I felt like I was going to perish from her unique form of torture, she stopped. She leaned in close to me and slowly spoke in broken English. "I cannot… um… I stay away… must not be here."

I adamantly shook my head, desperately wanting to tell her no. I grunted and pushed at the gag with my tongue. I tried to pull my hands and feet from their restraints. But nothing worked. She was going to walk away from me. She was going to leave me. She walked toward the door, sadness written across her face, worry in her heart, her mind a jumble of thoughts that I couldn't understand.

Just when I was sure she was going to leave and never come back, she ran back to me. Quickly undoing my restraints and pulling the gag from my mouth. She immediately pushed her mouth to mine. She released me completely. I stood and pulled her to me, stronger than I should have Been, but still weaker than normal. I wrapped her in my arms and kissed her, taking everything that she was willing give to me.

"You must go," she whispered slowly.

"Yes, we must. You are coming with me. No way am I leaving you here."

She shook her head stubbornly, but I was not taking no for an answer. She was coming with me, no matter what I did. I took her hand and pulled her behind me. We needed to get out of here and somewhere safe so that I could transform her, so that she could be mine for eternity.

We ran from hall to hall, room to room, trying to find a way out. After a few minutes, she finally started to lead the way. She knew her way through here, she could get us out. And when we finally reached the outside world, I actually had hope that everything would be okay.

Based on the placement of the moon and stars, it must have Been three of four in the morning. The number of soldiers around seemed slim compared to what I expected. We raced across the open plain toward a forest set just on the outskirts of where they'd Been holding me.

And just when we both believed that we are home free, that we would be able to be together, shots rang out into the silent night. A scream escaped her lips and she fell to the ground. She was dead…


	10. Wrath

Chapter 10

Wrath

Time moved very differently since the day that I was turned. Years seemed to be such a long period of time in life, now one year was a small moment in time. Years now seem to pile on top of each other like days and weeks had all those years ago. When I was alive, I was sure that in one year I could change everything. I was sure that all I needed was one year to fix mistakes, make amends, make changes, and change the course of my destiny. I never realized, there was no destiny. Now some may say that it was my destiny to become a vampire. But really, how could destiny predetermine such a thing? I stopped believing in destiny when I was a man, and nothing in my life before or after my transformation led me to believe that there was some predetermined plan for people. Especially one that transformed a man into a killer. Why would destiny want that for me or anyone?

Even after centuries and all that I had seen, I still didn't believe in destiny. How could that possibly be? Just the events that had happened over the past forty plus years with Beatrice should have convinced me. But it hadn't. Yes, clearly there were supernatural events at work, and supernatural beings walking the earth. At that point in life, I wouldn't be surprised if I came across a being from another planet that was blending in with humanity, or other supernatural beings. But destiny? I came to believe that destiny was just another thing for humans to put faith in when times are bad. They fell on their faith in religion, each other, and destiny to answer all of the questions that they couldn't fathom or answer. Was it the destiny of my last victim to die at my hand? And if it was, for what reason other than to provide me sustenance? Or was it my destiny to be abused and mistreated by my father? If so, then why? What did that experience teach me? It didn't teach me strength, nor did it teach me perseverance. It taught me hate and distrust. Neither of those things helped during in my time in this world. When I was alive, the hate and distrust made me a despicable man. It made me the kind of man that no woman would ever really love and no man would ever really want to befriend. In my time as a vampire, it had done nothing for me, but fuel my hatred for my father enough to be able to kill him and burn his home and everything in it to the ground. What did any of that have to do with destiny? Hate, love, friendship, these are emotions, not destiny.

Was it my destiny to meet Beatrice only to lose her three times? How could that possibly be? That would mean it was her destiny to die three horrific deaths. Because let's face it, the deaths that she has had to endure were not nice peaceful deaths. Being eaten alive by a horde of vampires and being shot to death twice wasn't the way a pure, sweet soul should die. Now why would destiny decree such a thing?

~oOo~

After the war, all of us including Amar returned to America. The return of American soldiers and the end of the war caused a firestorm of patriotism, the likes of which I'd never seen in all my years. Soldiers were given a hero's welcome while women bowed out of jobs that their soldiers once occupied to return to the kitchen. Re-domesticating women seemed to make everyone happy, but hearing their inner thoughts I knew differently. Many women resented having to return to domestic life, some even fought it. But no one wanted to deny their heroes their jobs.

Since the end of the Second World War, I had found out several things. The beings that I'd surrounded myself with were true and loyal to a fault. These beings were viciously protective of each other and of me, they were loyal, and once you'd gained their trust they would stand by you no matter what. I always knew that Zeke and Uriah were protective, but the females and William always seemed weaker to me. That was until they found out about Beatrice. When I told them all about meeting Beatrice in France, then Bea in Chicago, then Betty in Germany, the females became fiercely overprotective when human women approached me. Always worried about Beatrice's return and the more brazen females that walked the planet now. They believed that Beatrice was a problem that made me weak. They didn't understand that I felt imminently stronger when I was in her presence. Like she completed some part of me that was missing. That suggested that fate or destiny were at work, and I just didn't believe in destiny. The women always managed to push the more annoying females toward Uriah and Zeke, worried that Beatrice would return. I didn't understand their reaction to Beatrice. Even Amar tried to explain the idea of soul mates and my connection to the woman. But the females behaved in a manner that I couldn't understand. I didn't know if I ever would understand them.

The fifties were what appeared to ignorant onlookers to be a time domestic bliss. There was a huge explosion in the population through the late forties and fifties. People getting married and starting families upon returning from other countries. The American dream seemed to be in full swing, but what sat just below the surface of the perceived perfection was a hell storm that would threaten to tear this country apart yet again.

The group of us traveled the country from place to place, searching for our personal version of the American dream. And through our travels we saw it all. Women pretending to be happy being mothers and housewives while husbands went out and worked fifty or sixty hour weeks just to support their American dream. They all pretended to be happy. They all put up the picture of perfection for the world to see, but what was really there was infidelity, lies, and sadness.

"Do you think they will ever figure out that the lives that they pretend to have is what makes them unhappy?" Marlene asked one day after Amar told her what he read from a seemingly happy couple at a late dinner. Apparently the woman was sleeping with the mailman, the man was sleeping with his male assistant, and neither of them was happy. He was hiding homosexuality, she was hiding her feelings for another man, but they both pretended to be a happy couple in love with each other and with life.

"I doubt it," Shauna said sarcastically. "They are too busy pretending to acknowledge that what they do is wrong. I mean who cares if you are homosexual. And if you don't love your husband wouldn't it be better to leave him than to sleep with other people? Humans are so screwed up."

Her assessment was more accurate than any of us really realized at the time. The more unrest we encountered, the more it effected my moods and attitude. I was more connected to human feelings and behavior than I ever noticed before. It was becoming difficult to separate myself from their feelings and moods.

One evening after a particularly brutal hunt, I found Amar waiting for me outside of our current home just before dawn. His demeanor and thoughts hidden from me in the shadows of his mind. He was the only being that I ever encountered that could hide from me the way he did. It was both refreshing and annoying.

"My young friend, what is happening to you? You become crueler as time goes on, but this is not my Tobias. I can sense the unrest in you. I can feel the way the humans are changing you. What has happened that has made you so much more in tune with human behavior? This does not seem like normal evolution of your powers."

"I do not know what you speak of. Nothing has happened to me."

"What about with Betty in Germany. Did something different happen with your interaction with her than in the past?"

I thought about what he was asking me. But the only difference was that I tasted her. I kissed her and tasted her saliva and her skin on her lips. But how could this change me? I have tasted many mortals.

"I kissed her. That was the only difference. I tasted her sweetness."

Amar seemed to take in what I said and studied me thoughtfully. For a long time he stared and concentrated on my face and I could feel him in my thoughts. I allowed him in without incident. If there was a problem, I wanted it resolved. "Your connection to her is becoming stronger. The first time it was just a look. Then a touch. Next a kiss. I believe that as you become more acquainted with her body and spirit, you become more in tune with humanity, particularly their emotions. You must find a way to separate the impressions you are feeding off of from your true emotions. You must detach yourself from them, otherwise I fear your wrath could be horrific."

I took in what he had to say. I had felt the feelings of all of humanity surrounding us infiltrating my being. However I had not Been trying to hide from it, I had Been trying to feed off it. I felt strong and powerful when I fed off of their feelings and the feelings imprinted on my surroundings. I remembered the conversation between Amar, Uriah, and Zeke while we were in Europe. They trusted my control, but he feared my power. Was I losing control? I felt like I was in control of myself. Instead of arguing the issue, I decided to ignore it. Humanity's emotions made me stronger and made me feel infinitely more dominant over my own feelings and needs.

We continued to travel around America, cities bled into one another. None of them was different from the last. People hiding things from each other, treating people badly because they looked different just because they could, and violence to try to assert dominance over the weak. It was especially bad in the southeast. Where we the Civil War was fought and slavery was deemed wrong, there in the southeast white people were still treating black people like they were nothing.

It was in the south that my connection to humanity took a turn for the worse. I fed off of their fears, their hatred, and their cruelty. I fed off of the imprints of the American Civil War and the unrest of the spirits that still walked the battlefields of the south. I fed off of it all and I used it to fuel my ferocity.

The worst was the night that a group of men in white cloaks and hoods tried to attack Zeke and Uriah. Both of them were of Native American descent, their Marlene skin and dark hair and eyes made them targets for some people. Humans would choose whatever they felt was different about someone to fuel their hatred. And the hatred that was prevalent in the south was bewildering. They were out alone one early evening, taking in the sights and sounds of the Virginia countryside. The picturesque Application Mountain range jetted up all around us, the small towns and beautiful fall colors all around were breathtaking. It was as close as I had ever Been to finding my version of the perfect American dream. That was until we were confronted with the true devastation and malice of humankind.

It still astonished me that men and women could treat each other horribly with little or no remorse about their behavior. But that was exactly what these men in the cloaks did. They passed judgment on others that didn't look like them and decided on the most severe punishments for the smallest perceived infractions. Usually these men focused more on those of African descent, but on this day they found my friends to be equally as guilty.

Uriah and Zeke were out in town taking in the sights and basically deciding if this would be a good place to settle for a while. We had Been traveling for quite some time and we were all becoming weary of roaming. We thought that the quiet country town could offer us some respite for a while. These country folks didn't usually take kindly to strangers, but they were usually hospitable enough to allow us our solitude as long as we didn't disrupt their lives. We had seen a lot of racial tension between the humans across America, but especially in the south. The White people treated everyone that wasn't white like they were animals. Behavior like this was uncommon in Europe and even though this was normal when I was human, I never agreed with it. You would have thought that after all this time they would change. But not these men. They believed they were better than everyone. They believed they were superior to other races and genders.

As Uriah and Zeke walked the quiet, dark streets of the small Virginian town they heard a scream pierce the night. Now to be perfectly clear, we didn't make it our business to get involved in the lives of humans. We didn't usually interfere in their lives, even if we witnessed their brutality. But on this night we all witnessed something we'd never seen before. The two vampires walked toward the sound of the scream, not to get involved, but to simply witness the viciousness of humanity first hand. We had all seen quite a bit of cruelty in our many years of wars and life, this was more than most of us had ever witnessed.

Uriah and Zeke came upon the group of white hooded figures with an African woman. She was strapped down to a wooden plank, completely nude and spread wide for all of the men to see. One man lay upon her, raping her while another had his hard male member shoved in her face. He had his fingers pressed into her jaw, forcing it open while he shoved himself into her mouth. All while the other men punched and whipped every part of her that was exposed. When some of the men noticed the two vampires' presence, they went after them. Zeke, being faster and stronger, was able to get away and moved into the mist, but Uriah was cornered. When Zeke found us, his normally brown eyes were aflame in the light blue of the vampire thirst. Ferocity dripped from him as he quickly told us of Uriah's capture.

When we arrived to the scene, we found a group of men trying to subdue Uriah with whips and chains. They weren't able to tie him down, but they were able to corner him so he couldn't get away. His ferocious blue eyes looked wild like a caged animal ready to strike and rip them all apart. I had no doubt that he could have, but with so many surrounding him his thoughts told me he didn't trust that he could get away unscathed. Meanwhile the woman was still being raped by multiple men and all of them were laughing and cheering each other on, seemingly having a great time.

When Amar, Zeke, and I approached the scene, they all stopped.

"What is this?" a man shouted in his horrible southern twang. "We have a fairy cracker and two wannabe niggers here to save the whore and the other wannabe?"

With that, Zeke went to launch himself at the stupid human man, but Amar stopped him. It only took a moment for the three of us to make a decision, the telepathy helping us to come to a quick decision on how to proceed.

_"__We have to kill them all,"_ Zeke all but shouted in our heads.

_"__What about the human woman?"_ I asked.

_"__We take her, we kill her or keep her, I don't care. But I cannot condone raping a woman." _Amar may not care about taking lives, but he didn't ever toy with his kills. He killed efficiently. He didn't believe in brutaBeaing or torturing people. The thrill of their terror just before he took their life was enough for Amar. I had always felt very much the same way until recently. The thrill of the hunt and the staunch terror they felt just before the light in their eyes dimmed was what I craved. Not this type of torture and violence. The sad reality was, we were perceived to be the ruthless killers, but in reality humanity was far more callous and inhumane than most vampires could ever be.

_"__There are around 10 of them here and five with the woman."_ Amar continued, _"We strike as one and we take them down. The faster the better."_

I nod, _"Then we must leave."_

With that decision made, the three of us attacked as one unit. Once we distracted the humans enough, Uriah was also able to join in to our assault. In a matter of minutes all of the humans surrounding us were lying dead on the ground. Quickly and efficiently we snapped the necks of the majority of them. I was like a demon in my own right. I found myself surrounded by the five men that were raping and battering the woman. They tried to subdue me, but something within me snapped. Feeding off of their hatred and the viciousness of what they were doing to the woman and what I knew they had done to multiple women, I let myself go. Within a moment, I had all five men on the ground in a heap. Not only did I break their necks, I completely ripped their heads off. Something in me took over, I was back in Paris with the Others attacking Beatrice. That was all I saw when these men came at me. I didn't see humans, I saw ruthless killers. By the time I came down, the only ones that remained were the ones running into the forest.

The ones that escaped, we made sure to take our time with them. They watched as we murdered their friends and when they saw our eyes and teeth turn toward them, they tried to run. I always did enjoy the chase and with my current state of ferocity, I enjoyed this even more. I loved the rush of adrenaline and the sound of their racing heart when they realized what was about to happen. For the first time in my 200 years, I played with my kills. The four of us chased down the men like predators, and when we pounced we let them see us for what we truly were.

"Demons!" one man shouted just before Uriah sunk his teeth into his jugular. By the time the last few were drained, the others were sedated. But the rush of my savage and wild act had me craving more. Looking into the eyes of my companions, I could see the awe and a little fear.

Amar approached me, his brown eyes having returned to their normal state. Looking at Uriah and Zeke, their eyes were also back to normal. But I could still feel the aggressiveness and need for another kill pumping through me. "What happened to you, young one?" he asked warily.

I scowled at him, ready for the fight, feeling the violence pump through me, fueling me. "What do you mean?"

"Tobias, you not only killed them. You tore their heads from their bodies. The amount of rage and strength you exhibited was nothing like I've ever seen before."

"Nothing happened. Just go take care of the woman," I barked.

Amar shook his head but did what I said. He was not one to take orders, but he knew when it was best to leave me. But I heard his thoughts. He was worried about the kind of wrath that over took me. He was worried about the darkness that had settled in me and seemed to be spreading as the days and weeks moved. I couldn't say that I blamed him. I worried about the darkness that I felt within me as well.

Zeke came up and put his arm on me, "You are one scary man. Alright, let's go take care of the woman."

We walked back over to find the woman, battered and bruised beyond recognition. Her heartbeat shallow and sporadic. Once untied, we covered her with one of the dead men's cloaks. She slowly opened her eyes and Amar spoke to her. "What is your name, woman?"

With a whisper she said, "Jenny."

Reading her thoughts, it seemed that she had Been there for a while. To the point that at least six of the men had raped her in every way a woman could me raped. She was weak and wishing for death to take her. And after what we did to her attackers, she was terrified of what would happen to her if she did survive.

In my head, I heard Zeke's voice, _"Take her, or I will. Be done with this."_

_"__Her mental state is too weak to transform her,"_ Amar said to us in our thoughts.

_"__Then feed from her, kill her, whatever. Just take care of it,"_ Uriah said. _"She cannot be left like this." _

"My young woman, I can make it all better if you want," Amar said to her to calm her. His sweet Italian accent still so prominent after such a long life. His warm and friendly face made people relax. Most could feel that there was something different about the man, but his calming look always lulled people into a feeling of calmness. "I can make it so no one harms you, ever again."

Opening her eyes wider, she looked at the elder vampire. With that last look, Amar took her life and with it her pain.


	11. Salvation

Chapter 11

Salvation

After witnessing all of the terrible things that humans did to each other throughout my life, the World Wars, and the viciousness of the way they treated each other in southern America, I became a vicious and ruthless killer. The taste of rage and the fear of my victims that I received that night in Virginia followed me through the rest of the 1950's and into the 1960's. Not only did I manage to embody the wrath that I fed off of that night, I became wrath itself. I started killing anyone I found that I felt was doing harm to humanity, and I wouldn't simply take their blood as sustenance as I always had in the past, I started playing with them before I killed them. Luring them into my spell, courting them, making them feel safe in my embrace, then I would lock them away. I would often take several at a time, and lock them in a room and toy with their fear, their desperation, and their desire to survive. I was eating up their terror as if it was the only thing that could sustain me. Their cries were better than the blood that I would never drain from their veins. I would kill them slowly and force my other captives to watch my dance.

The only thing that seemed even slightly redeemable about my behavior was the fact that my victims were always criminals. Rapists, murders, drug dealers, and anyone who asserted their dominance on others for their own enjoyment. I would force them to watch me play with my victims and I always saved the most despicable person that I captured for last. They would be forced to watch me take everything from my prey. I would play with them mentally, physically, and sexually, torturing them for my own pleasure. I loved their screams as I forced rapists to take the same sexual abuse that they forced on others. I craved the terror in the eyes of the murderer when they finally figured out that everything that they did to their victims was going to happen to them. I fed off of the panic exhibited by the drug dealer when they found that every drug that they had would be pumped into their system. For hours I would play with my victims, and in the end they all met the same fate. Death didn't come easy to my victims, and I never fed from them. I only used them for my games. You'd have Been surprised how easy it became for me to be a ruthless and vicious killer. No one ever seemed to notice these people were missing, no one missed them, and no one cared.

Over time, my companions stopped trying to convince me that what I was doing was wrong. At first, my fierceness was terrifying to them, especially the females. But after William mistakenly fed from a drug addict high on every drug she could get her hands on and he was killed because of his mistake, the others stopped caring about my personal vendetta.

It was a cold winter day in early January in 1964 when it happened. We were in New York City at the time. The city was brutal and those caught in the wrong place could easily be sucked into the depths of hell that were the city streets. We stayed in this area because no one ever noticed the miscreants that inhabited the alleys and under the bridges when they went missing. We all knew to stick together and to not feed off of the humans that were intoxicated on drugs or alcohol as it would affect us as well. But this day, William decided to go out on his own to feed before any of the others rose for the day. I was locked away with my current group of criminals while the others were locked away in their rooms, sleeping away the early evening hours. When we found William, he was dead. Next to him was the lifeless body of what we figured was his latest victim, a young woman. But then there was also another person, a large man with a hulking figure. He was battered and bruised and barely alive, but alive enough to read his thoughts. He had encountered William and the woman in what he thought to be the embrace of lovers. He was the woman's drug dealer and pimp, he was furious thinking she was giving something away for free in a back alley. When he grabbed William and threw him from the woman, her lifeless body hit the ground. William was intoxicated because of the amount of drugs in the woman's system and was unable to stop the assault. William fought back as hard as he could judging by the man's injuries. He managed to give him a mortal wound, but not before the pimp slit his throat with a knife plated in silver.

When the others found he was missing, they came to find me and together we scoured the streets to find William. When we finally located him, he was dead, his killer was alive but struggling. With a quick snap of the neck by Uriah, the man was dead. We placed William's lifeless body along with the ones that I had for my pleasure, his victim and the pimp in the abandoned house that I had Been using and set it aflame. By the time the fire department got to the house, it was an inferno and the bodies inside were unrecognizable, or at least that was what we heard.

After William's death, my mission to abuse and kill as many criminals as I could became a nightly activity for me. Years I continued my mission without falter. We moved from city to city across America, and because I never chose anyone but men and women that were on the fringe of society, the humans were none the wiser.

The further we got into the 1960's the easier it became to find victims living outside the norms of society. The 60's brought more drugs, anti-war protesting, and the end of the innocence that was the 50's. The conflict in Vietnam brought the return of the draft and Americans were angry, especially the younger generation. Gone were the days of American pride and support for the soldiers that were fighting. Unlike World War II and the Korean War, most Americans were angry that their country had any involvement in the battles. Instead of supporting the men that were being shipped to another country to fight, they brutaBeaed and tortured them when they returned. They protested through songs, marches, and evading the draft. They did drugs, drank, and became promiscuous. They moved from city to city, doing odd jobs for money in order to eat and purchase their drugs. They had no homes, their families were the people that they traveled with, and they didn't care about much of anything other than their next hit or their next lay. These miscreants claimed to hate the war, they claimed to only wish for peace, but many fed off of the riots that they caused. They would torture the returning troops, called them baby killers and other such names that made these boys and men dread returning home.

The 60's were a time of confusion in America, and we fed off of it. We enjoyed the ease of being able to lure these unwitting mortals into our deathly trap. To them, we looked like poets or musicians. All of us had our ability to blend in with the mortals and we are all beautiful creatures in our own right. Women loved Amar, Uriah, Zeke, and me, and men loved Marlene and Shauna. It was easy for us. We spent our time hunting and traveling, using the wayward characters that crossed our path to feed our hunger. While the others hunted as usual, I continued on my path of savagery, I loved their screams and their fear even more than I ever imagined.

Through the mid 60's I continued to use my special form of punishment to rid the world of the horrific people that walked. I started to add prostitutes to the types of people that I would seek for chastisement. After what happened with William and the prostitute, I had to include them in my games. They knowingly passed their diseases and other afflictions around to the masses and didn't do anything to protect the innocent from their rancid ailments. We were in California at this time. The women that I lured to me gave me little satisfaction when it came to the chase. They would come right to me when I walked down the city streets. Part of me enjoyed their pursuit, part of me longed for the hunt. But what I lacked in hunting, I made up for with their sheer terror. They were petrified of me and that alone gave me the thrill that I desired.

I so longed for that rush that I received from their fear that I started to hold them captive for longer than ever before. I would keep them alive for days, torturing them and using them to feed my desperate hunger. A hunger that was never quenched. I became so enraptured with the screams of my victims that I forgot the reason that I started focusing on criminals in the first place. I was addicted to their fear. And my friends were afraid of the rage I exhibited and my lacking worry about being caught.

We traveled through California, continuing south until we reached the border between California and Mexico. We focused on larger cities that had larger populations of prostitutes and other miscreants that we could hunt and kill. I loved Southern California in 1965, especially Los Angeles. It seemed that this was a place that people were running to in order to be a part of something. The number of people living on the streets in that city was staggering. And the number of criminals lining the streets was astounding. Some of them sold their bodies, some drugs, most of them enjoyed a life of excess beyond their means. Many of them did it as a means to survive while others just loved to get off or get high and make money while they did it.

We decided to stay in Los Angeles for some time because of the ease of hunting in that city. While I continued to take prostitutes and criminals and have my way with them the others hunted as normal. They found my salacious activities with my victims to be vile. Focusing more on prostitutes, women, I found that I became increasingly aroused sexually. Their screams of terror brought an awareness that I hadn't felt in centuries. I would become aroused while terrorizing these women, scaring them caused an awareness in me more than any other activity that I'd ever engaged in, human or otherwise. Once they were terrified and I was awakened sexually, then I would kill them. To help me get off on their fear, I would bite and slice at their bodies while I had my way with them. By the time I was done, it only took a little time for them to bleed out and die.

I continued on with my nefarious activities feeding, terrifying, and sexing every woman that I could find that sold her body. I loved it. I loved it until we made a move from Los Angeles to San Diego. That was where I found her again. This time she had similar dark brown hair but the exact same violet eyes. Her stature was small; small frame, short, but beautiful in every way a woman could be beautiful. I was sure it was her, her spirit called to me, her eyes were always exactly the same and when I saw her while I was hunting she looked at me like she knew me. The only problem was, she was a prostitute. A whore that sold her body for money and just like so many of the others, she seemed to love it.

Instead of immediately bringing her to me, I hunted her. I had to know if it was really my Beatrice. How could that beautiful heart go from being a woman of God to a common whore? How could my beautiful Beatrice be anything other than a pure? I couldn't understand how she could have fallen so far. Because of the huge difference between my Beatrice and this woman I had to be sure it was her, even if I could hear her essence calling out to me. I became sure it was her on the third night when I heard one of the other whores call her Trice. Just like the others, Trice was another version of the original name, Beatrice.

I watched her for a week. I watched her sell her body over and over to the johns that passed by her. They would take her body and use it for their pleasure in every way they could. It infuriated me that her body was being used in such a manner. I was angered by the fact that she had sold her soul for easy money.

During these nights I read her thoughts as frequently as I could. She was the daughter of an abusive father. Her mother left right after she was born and her father raised her, but he made her life hell. He made her his personal slave and when she came of age he made her his personal whore for his friends. He gave them his daughter in return for other things like drugs and money. He taught her to use her body to get the things she wanted out of life and that was exactly what she did.

On the sixth night I approached her and the other women that were around her. I was so enraged by her change that I had intended on treating her just like any other whores that I found. I was going to use her fear to heighten my arousal and then kill her. My hope for her was that she would be reborn into another life where she was the woman that she was supposed to be, and not this despicable creature that I found before me. Little did I know that killing her would not be an easy task for me. As soon as I touched her, as soon as my skin contacted hers, I knew undoubtedly that she was my Beatrice. Her aura surrounding her body vibrated when I touched her and her spirit hiding behind her eyes called to me in a way that it never had before. Almost as if she knew that wasn't supposed to be her life and she needed me to release her from it.

With every intension of taking her like I took the others, I led her and the other women to my new favorite spot on the promise of a big payout for group sex. When we arrived I tied them all to chairs and began my ritual of terrifying them to heighten my arousal. Hearing her screams and feeling her terror was more sexually satisfying than ever. She would scream and cry while I terrified the others, biting and cutting them as I took my sexual satisfaction from their screams. And when I was done I would stalk to her and touch her. As much as she hated it, her body betrayed her every time. It called to me and mine called to hers. Watching me have my way with the other women made her body crave my touch.

For a week I held her captive. I continued to bring whores to our private place, and when I would finish I would touch her so she always knew that this was all for her. She never spoke to me, she only whimpered at my touch and screamed from fear. One night after I disposed of my newest women, her fear and arousal reached its breaking point when I went to her to touch her. She moaned and begged me to take her, she desired me and the fact that she enjoyed what I did to the others both excited and terrified me. My self-imposed mission to torture prostitutes was at odds with my desire for this woman. I wanted to punish her like the others, but I wanted her for my own. My confusion was compounded by the fact that she was turned on by what I was doing to these women. She enjoyed watching me terrify and kill them. My Beatrice was gone to me, but this alternate version of her thrilled me at the same time.

It amazed me when I thought about how far we had both fallen. I never would have done these things a century ago. My need to torture mortals terrified me sometimes. The satisfaction I received from terrifying and maiming whores was also incredibly troublesome. I had desired their screams like a mortal man desires the flesh. But now with Trice, I desired it all. I loved her screams and her terror, but I loved her arousal and her need. Her thoughts screamed for me to take her body sexually, to feed from her, to use her for my personal satisfaction.

"Please," she begged me one night after I finished with the last woman. I approached her and slipped my fingers to touch her. "Please, take me. Use my body, but don't kill me. Please."

I moved my fingers slowly around her, prowling over her body like a predator who had finally captured its prey. Up until this point I sexually aroused myself but never penetrated any of the women I brought here. So her request was both terrifying and erotic at the same time. "You don't know what you wish for," I threatened in a low voice.

"I know what you are. I want you to take my body and taste me while you do it. I'll submit myself to you. Please." Her begging drove me over the edge on which I had Been teetering for a week. How could this creature possibly be my Beatrice? She was so different, but yet so much the same.

Without another thought I took her body. I took her body in the most primal sexual manner I could. I had Been torturing myself, arousing myself for weeks so finally being able to have the release was euphoric. While I continued to thrust into her body, she offered her blood to me.

"Feed," she demanded. "Feed while you take my body for your own." She tilted her neck to the side to offer me access to her vein. I took what she had to offer and it was the most exquisite and intense experience that I had ever had. I only drank enough to heighten my arousal and in the process hers as well. I had never Been as satisfied as I was that night. Not ever since I was turned did I feel so fulfilled from just a taste. But with her, that was exactly how I felt. When I finished with her body, I placed her on a bed and provided for her so she could regain strength. For the next week I halted my escapades with prostitutes and all other victims. I focused only on her. I would take her body and while we were in the throes of passion I would nibble and drink from her. Nothing could have Been more perfect, that was until she offered herself to me.

"I will be yours," Trice said to me. "I'll be yours. I'll live with you and help you hunt and you can have me in any way you want. You can turn me and make me yours forever." She was willingly giving herself to me. I was elated at her offer. But could I do it? I had waited to have her for so long that I was worried that I wouldn't have the strength to actually take her life. I loved her, how could I sentence the woman that I have loved for more than 60 years to an eternity such as my own?

I also had issue that this really wasn't the woman that I loved so. She was changed by circumstance, by the way her father raised her and taught her to use her body to get what she wanted. And wasn't that exactly what she was doing here? She used her body to get me to give her what she wanted, a way out of the life she was living. But what would happen if I turned such a damaged soul? Would she become a cruel and vicious predator like I had become or would she be like the others and only kill when it was necessary for sustenance? Could I change her knowing that I could be creating a monster?

"You do not know what you asked for by beauty," I said to her. "I cannot do that, not to you. My love for you prevents me from sentencing you to an eternity of death."

"But my love, I will only be with you in this way for such a short time. Thirty or forty years to the likes of you is nothing in comparison to the eternity that you have here on this earth. I want to give you this gift."

I sighed, "And if you tire of me?" That was what I think worried me the most. I could meet her every twenty years, there would always be a new introduction and learning about one another. If she were with me for eternity, how long would it be before she left me? How long before she decided she didn't want to be with me anymore? It only took a century for me to tire of Max and leave him. Would it be the same for Trice? I couldn't take that chance. I couldn't risk losing her for a lifetime in order to have her for more than a short while.

"I could never tire of you my love. I can give you my body for all time. Isn't that what you want? My body could be yours to take pleasure from, in any manner that you so choose."

"I don't think I can give you this. I value our time together too much to condemn you."

Reading her thoughts I knew she didn't understand my fear. She felt like I was refusing simply to keep her this way. But then again, that was exactly what I was doing. I was refusing to give her my eternal gift in order to keep her exactly the way I wanted her. But this Beatrice, this version of my love was wrong, how could I make her mine? She was looking for a way out of the life that she had. She only saw me as an escape from what she knew. She was trying to manipulate me to get what she wanted by using her body. How could she understand my love for her was an eternal love? I wasn't even sure if she knew what true love was. Had she experienced love in any form or had she only known the physical pleasures of the flesh that she indulged in her daily life? I couldn't take this version of Beatrice and make her mine. She wasn't the woman that I craved. The woman I wanted would take my damned soul and raise it up with her own. But two damned souls couldn't find salvation. Two damned souls couldn't find peace. Two damned souls could only find damnation in the pits of hell.


	12. Anguish

Please remember and understand that this is actually an original novel that has been professionally published. The Becoming by Shelly Davis is available on all ebook retailer sites. My original characters didn't look like the Divergent characters, and when I changed their names, I didn't change the way they look. I am only publishing here because so many of you have been so supportive and have read everything that I've written. I wanted to share this book with you because so many of you have been so loyal and supportive. So that is why my characters don't really look like they should.

I hope you like this story and if you do, I hope you purchase it at whatever ebook retailer you prefer. If not, I'm still publishing it here, but it won't be here forever. Once the final chapter has been published, I'll give it a week and then delete the entire story. Thanks for reading. I hope you like the story. Don't forget to leave a review for me to let me know what you think.

Thanks,

Z (Shelly Davis)

Chapter 12

Anguish

We stayed together, held up in our tiny house where I continued to ravage her body over and over. She didn't ask me to turn her again, but she took what I would give her and she fed off of it. I loved having her body as my own and what she gave me willingly was thrilling. I still brought prostitutes back from time to time and had my way with them in front of Trice. She loved watching me with others. I would terrify and kill them all while she watched. She became more and more aroused by what she saw, touching herself and letting me know what she wanted to see me do to them. So instead of just killing them, I started having sex with them and feeding from them. This seemed to heighten Trice's arousal even more. She enjoyed what I would do to these different women, she loved watching me take all that I could from them. And after I would satisfy my hunger, I would take her and have my way with her. Everything about our situation was raw and sensual, completely mind blowing and totally wrong.

For weeks we had our own little version of paradise, I fed on others and used their bodies to please Trice and then I took what I needed from her sexually. She never asked for more and she never tried to leave. She loved what I did to her body. Finally one day after I had my way with her and was sated from the sex and from feeding, she asked again for the one thing I wasn't willing to give.

"I want you to make me yours forever, Tobias. I want to be immortal with you. I can give this to you for an eternity, just you and me."

Lying next to her, I didn't know if it was my relaxed mood or the fact that I was drunk off of her, but somehow I agreed. Everything in me screamed to say no. She was damaged, I was damaged. She couldn't give me what I wanted or needed, and I couldn't be like this forever. This wasn't me, my behavior wasn't something that I could continue, but I didn't say any of that. My overly satisfied brain betrayed my every thought. "Fine. But first you must go out and make amends with this life. I will not take you if I think you are going to regret your decision after it is done."

"I don't need to make amends with this life. I have nothing in this life, I only have you."

"No, you must do this. Otherwise I will not abide by your wishes. Go, now. Come back to me at sunset. Say goodbye to the sun, to the teaming streets of people, to your life. Then come back to me."

She agreed and kissed me, "I'll return to you soon, mi amour."

When she left me, I decided I needed to go to my companions and tell them of the situation. They believed that I'd only Been wreaking havoc, taking my anger and aggression out on the masses. They were not aware that my Beatrice had returned to me. They didn't know that I had Been spending my time here with her, making love to her, marking her as my own.

I moved quickly through the early morning San Diego streets, back to the place that they had Been staying since we arrived. I didn't know if they would be welcoming to Trice, and if they weren't I'd simply leave them because no matter what, once night arrived she was going to be mine forever.

I slipped into the house that they had Been occupying and found Amar sitting in the living room seemingly waiting for me.

"Of course I'm waiting for you, young one. It has Been many days since we last saw you. Once I felt that you were coming back to us, I had to be the first to see you. What has brought you back home? Has the darkness clouding you finally subsided?"

"I don't know if the darkness will ever truly leave me, Amar. I only mirror the humans. Over the past two hundred years, they have yet to show that they have evolved and overcome the things that make them terrible. They are too willing to kill one another just to prove a point. They are too willing to go out and start wars and kill innocent people in order to push their own agenda. Mass murder, religious cleansing, and war, for what? To force superiority on the weak or innocent. I don't know if my darkness will ever fade because I don't believe theirs will ever fade. But I do know that I have found a small light. I had found my Beatrice."

Amar looked at me and took in what I said. I could hear what he was thinking and for the most part he agreed with me.

"You know that I agree with you about humanity. They are a cruel and vindictive race. But what I am concerned about is this news about Beatrice. Are you sure that it is her?"

"I am positive. Our hearts are linked. It is her, and I am going to make her my own forever. No more losing her to death. I am going to make her mine, my bride for eternity. Will you support me in this endeavor?"

Amar seemed to take what I said and consider it. I tried to read his thoughts to get an idea of what he was thinking, but he closed himself off to me. He heaved a heavy sigh and simply nodded. "Of course I will support you, my young one. The others may need some persuading. The females in our group are not convinced that these women are the same soul. They do not trust that you are able to see clearly when it comes to this situation."

I growled low in my throat, "Well then call them in here. I shall convince them or I shall leave this group and go out on my own."

After some time, all of the young vampires were sitting in front of me. They looked on edge, waiting patiently for me to speak. They had all seen my wrath and what they had seen worried them. They didn't comprehend that being constantly bombarded with the imprints of people and places, my connections with my surroundings and with humanity, was making me what I was. Being connected to humans I couldn't always stop what was happening and because of that connection I fed off of it, I used it, and in this case its darkness enveloped me and made me.

After a few silent moments, I addressed my companions. "My friends, I wanted to speak to you because I have once again found my Beatrice. I have decided to make her my eternal bride. Tonight I will take her humanity from her and share our life with her."

The group sat silently, but their thoughts screamed out at me. Zeke and Uriah had much negativity in their thoughts, but Marlene and Shauna were furious. Just when I was about to address their screaming thoughts, they spoke aloud.

"How could you?" Shauna shouts. "You don't know if this is the same woman. You can't possibly know." Her eyes ablaze with fury and her auburn hair reflecting the light in the room, making her look like her head was aflame. Shauna troubled me. She frequently acted like a scorned lover when it came to Beatrice. She had seemed to be attached to Zeke but over the years, it seemed like she tried to attach herself to both Amar and myself as well. Her behavior any time I spoke of Beatrice was infuriating. "How could you think about bringing that whore into our lives? She's nothing but a common whore."

I narrowed my eyes at the woman and growled deep in my throat. I knew this version of Beatrice wasn't perfect, but neither was I right now. Our surroundings and the environment had changed us both for the worst. I knew I could pull myself out of the pit in which I had buried myself and I could only hope that I could pull Trice out with me.

Marlene in her innocence spoke next. She was worried, but not angered like Shauna. "What if this woman comes here and does something to harm us? What if this connection isn't because she is meant to be your bride but she is meant to deliver us all to death? You can't possibly know that she isn't some kind of ancient being created to kill us all."

Amar snickered, "You, young one, have Been reading too many books. In all my years of existence, I have never encountered a race of vampire killers. But I have however encountered evidence of reincarnation. I also have the ability to see and read auras on humans. I have seen this woman, she has the same aura about her. Tobias can read her essence, it is the same soul from body to body and decade to decade. This is the same woman. I support Tobias."

Zeke and Uriah nodded their agreement. "Fine," Shauna said. "But we will not care for one that is incapable of caring for herself. If she is not strong enough for this life, do not expect anything from us."

Marlene concurred but did not verbalize any more complaints.

After our conversation, I disappeared into my room for rest. I had not rested well for weeks with Trice. I was so caught up with her, drunk off of her and the time we spent together that rest was not a worry. But now I felt weary, the connection still calling to me, but it was faint because of distance. I loved that in just a few hours she would be mine.

~oOo~

At night fall I was startled awake by a feeling of foreboding. The desolate feeling of loss and the anguish that only death could provide assaulted my body and spirit. I knew there was a problem and my worst fear was it had something to do with Trice.

Bounding down from my room, I found Amar already waiting for me at the door. "There is trouble, my friend. I fear the worst," he said quietly. "Can you feel it?"

"Yes, I do. But how is it that you felt it also?" I couldn't explain what I felt. The night had a hollow feeling, like something was happening to shatter the serenity that was supposed to surround people when they slept.

"I am connected to you, so I often feel what you feel from your surroundings. It is how I sense when you are around before I see you. It is how I know the darkness that has had such a hold on your being has dissipated greatly. It is also how I know that these women are all the same soul in various bodies."

"What is this feeling? The foreboding in the air. Is it just for me or is it humanity?"

"I do not know, but we must find out."

The two of us left the house silently. We didn't know what this feeling was, so we didn't want to involve the others until we were sure of what was happening. We traveled the streets of San Diego trying to piece together what I was feeling with what was happening around us. The streets seemed to be normal on the surface, there were no real signs of trouble or conflict among the humans. But the sense that something was wrong was like a blanket poised to suffocate me. The imprint of trouble, an unusual disturbance echoed across the streets and over the buildings. There seemed to almost be an invisible path on the cement that only I could see and feel. We followed the trail around the city, searching for the root of the unrest.

We found ourselves outside of the house that Trice and I occupied for so many days. The pull that I felt to this place was strong and the ominous feeling had encompassed me completely. The path that I was sure I saw, ended here. I could see the impression of suffering in this place, but I wasn't sure if was the suffering that I caused or if it was some other problem that I had yet to uncover. Shoving down the worry, I burst through the door and immediately I was met with the stench of death. It was not so much a real stench as a feeling in the atmosphere surrounding the house. Something was horribly wrong in this house and the fact that it was calling to me had me apprehensive about what I might find.

Moving silently through the house, Amar and I checked each room for any signs of trouble. When we finally reached the bedroom, my apprehension about what lied on the other side of the door had escalated. I knew what I was to uncover, I could feel it, see it, smell it. The stench radiating from this room was revolting. Neither of us could be prepared for what we would discover. Inside there were several women, most likely prostitutes from the looks of them, scattered around the room in various positions. The amount of blood and bile in this room was nauseating. The women had Been sliced from the pelvis to their chest, spilling their insides to the floor. Some of the women were still alive. I could hear their weakening heartbeats and their silent pleas for death to take them. The pain and anguish of their thoughts washed over me with amazing clarity. At least in my darkest moments with my victims, they were put to death quickly. I may have played with them, terrified them, but their pain was minimal. Their deaths were always fast and efficient. But these women, they had Been here for hours waiting for death to finally take them and release them from this pain.

Moving swiftly, Amar and I took the lives of the ones still suffering. When I got to the last girl, my breath was stolen. Her hair was caked with blood and dirt, her clothes torn, and her face battered and bruised but I would know her anywhere. Her heart calling to me, begging me to release her from her pain. She could feel me, she knew I was there, but she was too far gone for me to save. Even our healing ability wasn't enough to save her. Turning her wouldn't help mend her body, the damage was too extensive. Peering into her thoughts one last time before I relieved her of this life, I found that a man did this to her. The others went willingly thinking they were going with just another john, but Trice didn't go willingly, she didn't want this. This was why the damage to her face and body far exceeded the others. She fought him before he knocked her unconscious.

Amar moved in front of me before I could protest and made quick work of taking Trice's pain from her. Yet again she was lost to me, but this time I finally had a place to direct my fury. Before her last breath I saw the face of the man that took my Beatrice from me. I promised silently that I would find this man and destroy him.

~oOo~

For weeks Amar and I tracked the man responsible for Trice's death as he traveled up the west coast of California, killing as he went. None of the deaths were quite as brutal as the ones in San Diego, but they were all the same. The only differences were, he didn't leave any others to bleed out like he did in San Diego. Instead he sliced them across the abdomen, inflicting the pain and anguish that he desired, then he slit their throats to end their pain.

Zeke and Uriah joined us in Santa Barbara and the four of us continued to stalk this man through every major city in California. The imprints he left behind in his wake were terrifying. What had started with prostitutes in San Diego, changed by the time he reached San Francisco. Prostitutes were no longer the only women he was destroying, he started taking women from all walks of life. He was making a name for himself as another Jack the Ripper as he ghosted his way up the coast. Police couldn't find him and we were always one step behind. He seemed to kill without reason, he destroyed without motive, and he passed judgment on females without cause. There was no longer one set woman that he chose. He didn't discriminate and he didn't leave a trace that the human police could use to find him. All of their DNA and other samples were useless because they had nothing to compare it to. He truly seemed to them to be a ghost.

For months the four of us pursued the California Ripper until we finally caught up with him in Shelter Cove. The imprint of his presence was on this city, the weight of his crimes wreaking havoc on the surroundings. I could feel his presence and what he intended to do to the women of this city. Women all along the coast of California were terrified. The ferocity with which this man killed haunted the entire state. But it was the impression of Trice lingering on him that haunted my sleepless days. Her essence was attached to his man, leaving a trail across the state for me to follow. The closer I got to him, the more I could sense what he did to her.

Finally, after seven months of tracking this wretched man through the state, we found him. He was holed up in a shack in the forest, probably plotting his next move. When we moved toward the house, his insane thoughts invaded my brain. This man not only believed he was doing the lord's work but he believed that all of the women that he killed, twenty across seven cities, were the bitches of the devil. He saw his actions as a mission from whatever god he believed in. He believed he was wholly just in his actions. These types of men, when they found their way into power, caused wars and destroyed entire civiBeaations.

Moving as one unit, the four of us surrounded the shack and entered. We found the psychotic man lying naked on the floor chanting and masturbating to the sound of women screaming on a sound recorder. His thoughts focused on the screaming women as each of their faces flashed in his mind. I was crazed when I found him thinking of Trice. He enjoyed what he did to her most of all, because of her fight and desire to live. His movements became faster and more erratic as he crested his arousal when he thought about what he did to those women.

With the stealth of a pack of wild dogs, the four of us pounced on him. He didn't even put up a fight, he didn't have time to react. The four of us ripped him to shreds, leaving him bloody and dying on the floor. His last thoughts were of his impending acceptance into heaven.

Amar took pieces of his clothing and what we could only assume were trophies from his victims and left a trail for the human police to follow to find this crazed man. He may already be dead, but the women of California deserved to know they were no longer being hunted. The crazed sociopath had been found and stopped.


	13. Reunited

Chapter 13

Reunited

After 200 years, one might think that I'd seen it all. I'd seen wars, brutality, discrimination, and every other terrible thing that humans could do to one another. They cheated, lied, and stole to get ahead. They were cruel and vindictive, abusive and obnoxious to each other. There were so many people who just didn't seem to worry about anyone else out there that it shocked me when I encountered someone who cared. Very few people did things to better the world around them. They simply took and took without compassion or ever giving back.

It was no surprise that I managed to feed off of the worst parts of humanity. It took the visions of a deranged madman for me to see the error in my behavior. I no longer felt the need to punish criminals, I didn't feel that my actions were somehow acceptable because of who I was killing. I suddenly realized that these people, much like me, fed off of the worst of humanity. I needed to see the good once more in order to find my way out of the pit of despair that I had dug for myself.

The 1970's were no different than the 1770's really. There was still terrible discrimination. People were treated dreadfully because of the way they looked or the color of their skin, women were treated differently because of their gender, and even the people who had sworn oaths to put others first went back on their promises. The world had seen much progress over my lifetime, but humans had barely made any strides to better themselves or to evolve.

The beginning of the 1970's continued very much like the end of the 60's. Social change was stirring with the Civil Rights Movement, desegregation of public facilities, and laws preventing discrimination against anyone. People were fighting for their rights more but others were fighting just as hard to keep them down. It actually amazed me that people hadn't changed much in the last 200 years. They were still making judgments about others based on how they looked. They were still judging their worth and the worth of others by what they had and not who they were. I really believed that by now, humans would have evolved beyond the people like my father and the other rich plantation owners that I knew in my time, but they hadn't. It was a sad state of affairs when you could look back over 200 hundred years and see very little change in humanity.

Not long after we left clues for the human police to find the California Ripper, his dead body was found. They were able to match his finger prints and DNA to that left on some of the massacred women. They were able to put the case to rest, even though they had no leads on who killed the killer and they never would. But his death let the women of the country relax slightly, the sad reality however was women could never totally let their guard down. They were frequently hunted by some maniac somewhere because where one maniac was taken off the streets, another wasn't far behind.

After California and based on my previous escapades, one might have expected me to completely lose my mind after what happened to Trice. I knew that was what my companions thought once we met back with the females and left California completely. I could hear it in their thoughts and see it in their eyes. They feared my wrath, they were terrified that I would destroy myself and them because of my unrestrained rage at losing my Beatrice once again.

What they didn't see and what they would never know was that my immeasurable fury was doused by my feelings of absolute desolation. Not because I lost her again, but because I was almost happy that Trice was lost to me. There were parts of my Beatrice there, but mostly Trice was an alternate version of the woman Beatrice was supposed to be.

They say that everyone has different versions of themselves and the decisions that we make influence the person we become. We are made from our choices, our surroundings, and our society. The 60's version of Beatrice was changed by the actions of her father, war, what was acceptable in society, and the drastic and sweeping changes occurring across America and the world. It was no longer a happy and innocent America, but a turbulent and shifting one. And Trice had taken all of that to the extreme, a product of her father's teachings and the times, she used her body and her sexuality to get what she wanted out of life. People were looking for easier ways to make money and that was what Trice did. She sold her body so she could get what she wanted from life.

Change was necessary for people to evolve and transform, but such enormous fluctuations between innocence and experience in such a short period of time had incalculable ramifications. In the 60's the consequences of the naivety of earlier generations was for the young to rebel and try to make something of themselves without guidance and assistance. This left many out to flounder and find their way by any means necessary. Trice was one of those trying to find her way no matter what she had to do. Selling her body to survive was only one facet of what she did to survive.

So instead of feeling rage with the grief that I felt from losing her again, I only felt the pain. My heartache subsided and I continued on, but for a while I mourned the loss of my soul mate without the fury and destruction that I had before.

After leaving California we continued to move through the Midwest, trying to find a place to settle down for a while. The fear clouding my companions regarding my wellbeing subsided. They no longer seemed to believe that I was going to lose my mind and begin my own killing spree again. They allowed me the time to mourn and come to grips with our lives while we tried to find a place to settle down, but I still heard their fears echoing in my head and felt their worry. The females worried about the next time Beatrice would come. They couldn't understand my gifts because they had no real gifts of their own, so having to go on what Amar, Zeke, and I said made them wary. Uriah also worried, but his main concern was because of Marlene. He worried that at some point he would have to choose between being with the females or leaving Amar and me. He was loyal to them, but his loyalty also resided with us. He didn't want to have to choose, so he feared any return of Beatrice. Zeke was the one that surprised me the most. Over the years, he got quite good at being able to manipulate the humans and weaker vampires, but he also became quite skilled at closing himself off to me. He could hide most thoughts from me, until he became enraged or worried. I found that his worry for me made that wall come down just enough to know that he believed me, he just didn't know if my connection to the woman was a good thing or not. His fears and thoughts mirrored many of Amar's. If I had to be honest, his fears mirrored my own also. I couldn't help but notice that each incarnation of the woman was worse than the last in some way. They all had problems that seemed to get worse. Or maybe it wasn't the problems that got worse, maybe it was her reaction to them that made things worse.

Our travels took us all over, we found that in the winter it was best to stay south. So when January arrived, we avoided traveling too far north, staying in places like Oklahoma, Nebraska, and Colorado. The only problem with these places was that major cities were few and far between, making it difficult to hunt without being noticed. In smaller towns, everyone knew each other, even the vagrants. So if someone new was around everyone noticed and if someone went missing, they all saw that too. Moving further south we found ourselves in Texas and finally able to relax a little in some of the larger cities like Huston, Austin, and Dallas. There was enough of a fluctuation of immigrant workers in these areas to provide us with just enough anonymity to hunt and live.

It was easy to ride out the 70's in Texas. Even with all of the turmoil of scandals and resigning presidents, gas shortages, and social change destroying people's belief systems, Texans were all still the same. They made it easy for us to move around and live because unlike those small towns, people in the city just didn't care about each other as much. In Texas, with the oil drillers and wealthy men and women all around, it was almost like being back in Europe a hundred years ago with the high society people that Max loved. Because of the extreme wealth of the area, Texas made it easy for us to add to our considerable bank account. Over the years we had done a lot of different things to secure our ability to wander as we saw fit. We took valuables and money from victims, we invested the old money that both Amar and I had come to acquire over the centuries, rolling the funds over to one another every so often so we had constant access to our money. It was necessary so that we could live as we wanted. If I learned anything from Max, it was that money was necessary for us to live and we had to secure those funds so that we wouldn't have to worry.

I often thought of my old friend and creator. We parted ways so long ago now that it almost seemed strange to remember him or be curious about him. But my curiosity was squelched when a familiar feeling washed over me. We were all at a gallery opening in Austin when the feeling came over me. Looking around I found the familiar brown eyes of Max staring back at me, astonished to see me. He could never hide his feelings from me. He was excited to see Amar and me but was confused by our other companions.

Getting the attention of my friends, we moved to a secluded area outside in the late evening Texas summer. The sun had only set a few hours ago, but the stars burned bright in the clear sky. The full moon cast a glow on the ground and everything that it could touch.

"What are we doing outside?" Uriah asked when the group of us exited the building. "I was eyeing up my next conquest." His smirk earning him a growl from Marlene standing next to him. They usually hunted together and she didn't like it when he decided to venture out on his own.

"There is an old friend among us, and I thought it best to move away from the mortals for introductions," I explained.

"Who is this old friend?" Zeke frowned. I could feel his animosity and his annoyance. Zeke didn't do well others. He was fiercely over protective and he didn't trust anyone that he didn't know.

"The old friend is Tobias's creator, Max," Amar explained just as Max came out of the building and into the courtyard where we were congregating.

"Tobias, it has Been a lifetime," he said with a weary smile. He looked very much the same as he had when we last saw each other. His Marlene skin and dark brown hair and brown eyes made him look so calm and relaxed. His Spanish accent still strong after all the time that had passed. But time seemed wear on him. He looked older somehow, tired, and worn down by his eternal life.

I embraced my creator, the old annoyance and frustration with him long dissipated. "I am well Max. How are you?"

He sighed, seeming exhausted, "I am fine, my friend. It has Been a difficult time, as I'm sure you know."

Reading his thoughts I could see what he was talking about. Time had not Been kind to him. His love for the more beautiful things that Europe had to offer plunged him into the more deplorable parts of the last two wars. He found himself caught up in smuggling for Germany during the Second World War. He was responsible for stealing some of the more famous pieces of art that were lost during the war. It took him years to extricate himself from the grasp of the Germans and when he finally did, he found himself in Great Britain in the 60's. The hippy lifestyle in Great Britain was very much like that of America, but much more locaBeaed. Where in America, the hippy lifestyle was relegated to the major cities and small towns were virtually untouched by the phenomenon, Great Britain was very different. His body had encountered so many drugs from his conquests that it seemed to have affected him greatly.

Weary from his exploits, I could feel him relax in our presence. When Max turned his attention to Amar, he seemed almost euphoric. But when he turned to the scowling face of Zeke, he recoiled.

Placing my hand on Zeke's back I introduced Max to our friends. "Max, please meet Zeke, Uriah, Marlene, and Shauna. We have Been traveling together for around sixty years now."

Max bowed slightly, "It is nice to meet you all."

Max looked between Amar and myself and sighed. I could hear his sadness and fear. He wanted to return to us. But he worried that we would turn him away. He was wary of Zeke and his alpha mannerisms. He knew Amar and I didn't follow the young vampire, but he also knew that Zeke was stronger than he and therefore could dominate him if he desired. But his loneliness was what was driving him. He had Been traveling alone for a very long time. "Where have you Been all of this time?" Max asked looking between the elder vampire and myself. "And how is it that you ended up back together?" There was a sadness in his tone.

"We have Been all over the world," Amar explained. "After we parted ways, I returned to Italy and Tobias returned to America. He and our new friends came to find me in Italy in the 30s. From there we fought in the war for Great Britain and then I returned to America with them following the war. We have Been traveling America since."

Max simply nodded his head, his sad brown eyes betraying his usual superior mannerisms. I thought at one point that seeing him behave less pompous would make him more tolerable, but now that I've seen him like this, he was just a shadow of himself.

"What are you all doing here?" Max asked.

"We have Been living here for a while," Uriah explained. "We just decided to venture into society tonight. We usually don't make it a point to attend such events."

"Yes, we enjoy simpler activities," Zeke interjected. "But the ladies wanted to attend."

"And far be it from us to deny such lovely ladies," Amar finished.

It must have Been overwhelming for Max to see the three of them speaking as one, finishing each other's sentences and acting as friends. The fact of the matter was, we really were all friends. According to Max when he created me, vampires were solitary creatures. They only traveled with others that they created. I did not create any of these creatures, we found each other when we needed one another. And as evidence would have it, vampires weren't as solitary as Max believed. Most I have encountered over the last two centuries traveled in small packs. It was only the Others in Paris that lived in a large coven. The rest we have passed have stayed to themselves but were not living alone. Max either chose the solitary life for a reason, or he couldn't maintain bonds for extended periods of time.

Zeke must have picked up on something in Max because he suddenly looked annoyed. He scowled at me then at Max. Whatever he was thinking however, I couldn't read. He had gotten good at hiding his thoughts from me so whatever it was, I would have to wait until he said something. Fortunately he didn't make me wait long.

"Why are you suddenly here? You have Been in Europe for the past hundred years. What brings you to this place at this time?" Zeke demanded of Max.

Suddenly looking more sullen, Max sighed. He turned to me and gave me a small smile. "Of course you would surround yourself with powerful creatures such as these." He turned back to Zeke and held his hands up as if in surrender. "I mean no harm. I am only trying to find myself once again. The last time I was truly happy was when the three of us were together in Europe. It is true. I have just recently arrived in America again and I purposely sought Tobias."

"What do you want from us," Zeke demanded further.

"I do not want anything from you, young one. I only want the companionship that I once had with Tobias and Amar."

"Well, we are a package deal," Marlene said scowling. "We aren't going anywhere."

"I understand," Max acquiesced. "I only wish to join you for a time."

A general feeling of unnerve passed through my young compatriots. They didn't trust easily for good reason. Life had given them no reason to trust anyone. They trusted me because in their eyes, I earned it. I didn't attack when I could have. I never treated them as if they were weak, even though my strength surpassed theirs greatly. They trusted Amar because I confided in him. But Max was a mystery. They only knew that he created me and that we parted ways for reasons that they didn't know. To them, my leaving him was enough of an admission to distrust as if I spoke the words.

Without saying a word, I allowed Amar into my thoughts. His actions here would be just as important as my own. I had misgivings about spending too much time with Max again. His behavior when we parted had become quite annoying and frustrating. Trust wasn't the issue with Max, it was the possibility that he would return to his childish and self-indulgent behavior that was my concern. But together Amar and I could give the young ones the assurance that Max could be trusted until we decided otherwise.

"Why don't you join us inside, Max," Amar invited. "We were just ready to enjoy the art. Then we were going to go out hunting."

"You won't be hunting here?" Max asked shocked. I don't know if he thought that we changed at all. But we were never ones to hunt in societal areas. We had always preferred hunting those that would not be missed.

"No, we do not hunt in such places," Shauna said with an annoyance in her voice. "Tobias wouldn't let us even if we wanted to."

Max shook his head and smiled, "I should have known. You don't change my young friend." He paused and took in our little group, "Thank you for the invitation. I accept."

The following months were interesting with Max included in the group. He introduced the young vampires to the parts of high society that I always avoided. He didn't stray from our no hunting those that would be missed rules. Over the years we realized that with the technological advances in humankind that we would have to be more careful with how we hunted. The missing were searched for now more than in the past. Humans attempted to try to find killers when they found dead bodies. We didn't want to do anything that would draw them to us for any reason. So we hunted only those on the fringe of society. Those that were already lost. This new Max understood why and complied.

The 1970's were far more interesting than the previous decades. There was an abundance of new and interesting music, drugs, and attitudes. And as the end of the decade came, we were all falling into the music scene. We realized that there were lots of lost souls out there following around the various bands that toured in the cities. We moved from city to city observing these bands and the people that followed them. These people seemed to have no one but each other, just like the hippies from the decade before. Drugs were more prevalent and seemed stronger than ever before, so we had to be extra careful about those that we fed from.

As the 70s drew to a close and the new decade was entering, we found ourselves wandering the country again. For some reason the idea of settling in one place just didn't appeal to any of us. Even Max didn't complain about the wandering. We were all restless and the frequent travel seemed to help us all.


	14. Here We Go Again

Chapter 14

Here We Go Again

Things within our group had Been calm. Zeke still didn't trust Max fully, but he believed in Amar and me, so things had Been relatively calm. Max had changed quite a bit since the last time I saw him. He used to be incredibly self-indulgent, but now he was but a shadow of his former self. His personality still annoyed me greatly, but it was more tolerable with Zeke and the others around.

We traveled from city to city enjoying what each city had to offer. As we traveled I felt a pull once again toward the west, toward California. I wasn't sure why, but we followed the pull, back to the state that I last lost my Beatrice. We traveled from city to city across California enjoying all it had to offer in obscurity, but it became clear that it was Los Angeles that was pulling me in.

The 1980s were a time of gluttonous, avaricious people. Humans had Been getting greedier over the decades. They lived in excess, the economy was doing well and it could be seen in the way the people behaved. LA was the epitome of overindulgence. Everyone that went to LA was seeking fame and fortune and even though most never found it, they lived as though they had. Want-to-be actors and actresses, musicians and performers littered the streets. They were all unidentifiable, nameless people all searching for the same thing but never finding it. No one was happy and none of them did anything but dream. No matter where you turned on the streets you could find someone who was heartbroken, suffering, or depressed because they were living in obscurity. The streets were a minefield for the likes of Amar and me. Their sorrow was hard to turn off and it was hard for me to fight my connection to the human condition. This wouldn't have sent me into a murderous rampage, but it would have affected me severely.

The only people that seemed to enjoy the lifestyle in LA in the early 80s were the singers and bands that played at the clubs in the area. They worked odd jobs during the day, but at night they lived the life of extravagance in every aspect of their public lives. They used their money for alcohol and drugs, and they used the men and women who followed them for food and sex. Most lived in squalor in small apartments or crashing on couches and floors of friends and acquaintances. It wasn't about where they lived, it was about how they lived and they all lived hard and fast. Doing drugs, drinking, and having sex was all they wanted. Real fame wasn't totally necessary, but for the ones that found fame the excess in which they lived was unparalleled.

Max's materialistic personality actually served us well through the 80s. His ability to sweet talk and appeal to humans was useful. Women and men alike flocked to him. It didn't matter, they all loved Max. The rest of us were able to use Max's attraction for our own gain. When we saw the way the bands lived, we decided that creating a band would be our next endeavor together. We had never done anything so to draw attention to ourselves before, so the idea of being so brazen was intimidating. To facilitate our new unabashed attitude, we all learned to play instruments and began creating songs. It all came quite easy to us, we always excelled at being able to master whatever skills we attempted so this time we were using our skills to make music. I always felt Max's strength was in his understanding of the human condition. It was this understanding and my constant connection to the people and my surroundings that helped in writing songs and appealing to the masses. Once we had a good set list of songs, Max put his abilities to use making the masses swoon for us all. Zeke used his powers of coercion to convince the owners of the prominent clubs in the area that we were important, and I used my connection with the human condition to create songs that appealed to people. The effort got us playing the clubs regularly and brought us a large following of fans.

By 1985 we were seeing quite a bit of success. We played at one of the LA clubs most nights and we were also traveling around Southern California to play. With the notoriety that we achieved, we were able to spend more time performing than many others. We also used the notoriety and our good looks to lure unsuspecting victims to us. LA brought in all sorts who moved there on their own to seek fame and fortune so Marlene and Shauna would find the ones that were lost and alone and bring them to us. Most people that came to LA never found the limelight, however many of them found themselves as our next meal. But these were the ones that would suffer the least. They were alone, hungry, and desperate at least if they found themselves in our shadow, they wouldn't suffer. When those that we took would go missing, no one ever knew. Every now and again we would cross missing person fliers, but they were mostly from parents or loved ones from other states and by that time the missing person would have Been gone for months. The problem with LA was there were thousands of missing persons, and not all of them were our doing. They all just ended up nameless faces among all of the others out there.

We enjoyed the life that playing music provided us. Our nocturnal behavior was perfectly normal, our look matched that of most other bands during the time, and our ability to read people gave us an edge that others could never have. With our success came the groupies. Suddenly Marlene and Shauna no longer had to lure people to us, they were in abundance. Every time we finished playing the Roxy or Whisky-a-Go-Go, they would be everywhere. We found women in our dressing rooms, showers, in the halls, even waiting in the alleys or parking lots. Anywhere they thought they might be able to get our attention, they would hide and wait.

It wasn't long before my mates discovered that they not only enjoyed having these women as a meal, they discovered the sexual favors that many were able to provide were also enjoyable. I was the only one that didn't engage with the women that hung around us. After having my fill of Trice all those years ago, I couldn't bring myself to defile what we had with meaningless sex. I knew she would be coming back to me one day soon and I couldn't be engaged with another when that day arrived. But the others discovered that they quite enjoyed the attention after being hidden in the shadows for so long. Our dark and brooding attitudes just fed into the frenzied attention that we received from humans.

It was in one of the clubs that I got the feeling once more that my Beatrice had returned to me. By this time it was pretty clear when I was going to get a sighting of my beloved Beatrice. The feeling was no longer foreign to me, so I just knew that she would be here somewhere. The last time we were together we spent many glorious days together. Making love and becoming one with one another. And with that connection that we forged, I knew that our connection now would be so much stronger. I knew her faster and felt her near me more thoroughly after we touched for the first time, then again after we kissed for the first time. Now since our bodies knew each other on an intimate level, I just knew that our connection this time could be explosive. I also knew that this would be when I finally made her my own, forever. She wanted to be mine the last time. She wanted to join me in this life. But would this new creature want me? We had progressed so far, my cruelty and her impurity were a perfect match, but it was the wrong time. Because of her death, I was able to pull myself out of my vindictiveness and begin to behave as I had in the past. My only hope was that the creature that she has evolved to this time would be better than she was before.

When we arrived at the Roxy for our show, I knew my Beatrice was near. I knew she was looking for me, her body hummed for mine, made for mine, trying to find me in this swarm of bodies. It was impossible to single any one person out of the sea of women that surrounded the doors when we arrived. Various women with dark brown hair, teased and spiked and made to defy gravity surrounded us everywhere we turned. A sea of big hair, florescent colored clothes, and jean jackets were everywhere we looked. I especially couldn't find that one needle in this haystack of hair no matter how hard I tried or wanted to connect with her.

I searched the sea of women looking for the eyes that called to me, that pulled me into their depths. She could be here now, or she could be hidden in the city somewhere. I wanted to weave through the huge jumble of people to find my beloved, but I knew that I would have to wait until we crossed paths. This was something that I was never able to force, no matter how much I wanted. We would find each other and we would once again be together, that I was sure.

Making our way into the Roxy, I felt a rush of adrenaline pass through me. It was the feeling I got when I hunted, so having had this feeling when I had no intention on hunting was strange. We walked through to the bar area where we would be setting up on the stage and preparing for our show in a few hours. There were several bands on before us, on this night we were the headliners. The further I got into the venue, the more my adrenaline pumped, I couldn't explain it and I couldn't make it stop. That was until I saw her. She was standing behind the bar smiling at the man she was serving. She had her long dark brown hair curled and teased – it defied all laws of physics that I ever knew with the way it seemed to stand on its own. Her body was different than the last time. Trice was thin and average height, you could tell she was living a hard life. This woman was curvier and more voluptuous, but she was petite. She looked strong, she had the body of a dancer.

Her smile was the most mesmerizing thing about her. It was a smile that showed that she was truly happy, that she loved life and she couldn't be happier with what she was doing. But her thoughts betrayed what people saw. She wasn't happy. Like so many others she came to LA to seek fame and fortune and instead found herself behind a bar.

When she looked up and saw me standing there staring at her, she was thrown off guard. She tried to stifle her interest by continuing to work and talk to the man that was trying to get into her very short skirt. But I felt her looking at me, I saw her interest and I heard her frenzied thoughts trying to figure out who I was and why she felt like she should know me. She immediately felt the connection, her body instantly reacted to the sight of me standing before her. Her body knew me, her spirit called to me, and when her eyes fixed on me I knew it would only be a matter of time before I would have her in my arms again, under me again, taking all that I had to give her and more. I also knew that this time she would finally be mine.

The rest of the group must have noticed that I stopped moving and followed my gaze toward where my beauty stood, mesmerized by me.

"Is that her?" Zeke asked. Amar moved up next to me with Max and Uriah following so they could hear the exchange.

"I believe it is," I smiled. "I need to get closer to her. I need to see her eyes, feel her skin and then I'll know for sure if it is my Beatrice."

"Who is Beatrice?" Max asked. He knew about Beatrice in Paris, but he doesn't know about her reincarnation every twenty or so years. He doesn't know that she calls to me when she comes of age. And apparently she was what had Been calling me to California and Los Angeles the whole time.

"Do you remember the woman our Tobias was smitten with in Paris all of those years ago," Amar asked Max. Max nodded to the affirmative and then looked from the woman to me. "We believe with every horrific death she has, she is reincarnated later, and Tobias is drawn to her. They have a connection of some sort that we haven't figured out yet."

Max looked at us all like we were insane, "You cannot possibly think that woman is the same woman that was ripped apart by that horde in Paris, can you?"

"There was a horde in Paris? What kind of horde?" Uriah asked.

"A vampire horde," I said quietly. "That is how she died the first time. She was preparing to be a nun and when the horde found out that I was infatuated with her, they ripped her apart. They made sure there was no way I could change her and heal her. They devoured her." The thought still fresh in my mind, my heart still aching for her even after all this time.

"That is what set you off and made you kill all of those vampires?" Zeke asked. "The visions you showed us that first day so we knew not to fight with you." He was obviously remembering the visions that I gave them so they knew what I was capable of. I made sure he knew how volatile and dangerous I could be. I didn't want the problems, still don't, but I won't sit by and allow someone to suffer her fate again.

"Yes," I responded. "They destroyed her. And she keeps returning and when she does her soul calls to me. Searching me out, trying to find it's other half. She is my other half."

Max looked from me to Amar. His mouth hanging slightly opened and his brown eyes wide and shocked. It was a comical look on such a refined Spanish man's face. It didn't quite belong. "And you believe this?" he asked the elder vampire. "And you allow him to believe this? I can't believe you are so convinced that this human woman is your other half that you don't realize how insane this sounds." By the time he finished his tirade, he was shouting at me and Amar. "How could two of the strongest beings that I have ever encountered be so naïve? How could you think something so incredibly ridiculous?"

Amar looked at Max as if he were insane. Being older than any of us, he had occasion to see more than many of us would ever dream. His age and unusual strength and power alone allowed him to have witnessed more than most of us could ever dream. And when he spoke it was clear that he was frustrated with Max's usual narrow-mindedness.

"Max, I have seen evidence over my lifetime to indicate that reincarnation does indeed exist. I believe that this woman is one and the same. There is no doubt in my mind that she is returning and she has a connection to Tobias. How else would he find her every twenty years? It's too consistent to be a coincidence. I believe that Tobias's connection to this woman is a second chance for past misdeeds."

Max looked at Amar in shock, "Past misdeeds? What misdeeds?" he demanded. Then he turned to me, "And how many times have you encountered her. And how do you know she is the same woman?"

Amar ignored his questioning while I took a deep breath to answer, "This will be the fifth time that I have found her since Beatrice in Paris. I know it is her because her spirit calls to me. Her eyes are always the same odd violet color. I can see her old soul in her eyes. I can feel her. I know it is her, I have no doubt."

He turned from me to our companions, "And you all believe him too? You all allow him to chase after this unknown human?"

Marlene and Shauna snorted in unison while Uriah simply shook his head. It was Zeke that spoke up though. Always the alpha between the four of them. "Do you honestly think Tobias can be allowed to do or not do anything? You made him, you know his strength and power. Did you ever try to control him? He's uncontrollable for even the likes of Amar, what makes you think we have any control?"

Max shook his head, apparently not liking that I had a connection to the human girl. Well she wasn't going to be human for long. I would be taking her and making her my own before I lost her again.

Before anyone else had the chance to complain or speak their peace, the manager of the Roxy approached us. "Are you guys going to set up or what?" he asked.

Realizing that we had Been arguing for a while at that point, we all turned in acknowledgement and moved toward the stage where we would begin setting up our equipment for our show. My time with the beauty behind the bar would have to wait. But until then I would enjoy her eyes on me and her obvious confusion to how her body was reacting to my presence.


	15. Hungry Eyes

Chapter 15

Hungry Eyes

Becoming relatively famous in the LA bar scene was both advantageous and inconvenient. We had the world, so to speak, at our fingertips. So many were ready to lie down for us, but none of them expected what we needed from them. We were so well known that it was easy to get people to come to us, but we couldn't just take anyone. And after our shows when we were surrounded by the most women, we always were worn down and in need of sustenance. This was where Marlene and Shauna helped. They went out and found the most destitute and depraved people they could find in the alleys and other dark places in LA. They were the ones that couldn't return home for one reason or another but had found no providence in the streets of Hollywood. They were disillusioned and desperate. So when the girls gave those that they found offers of being with the band members, food, and money, they came willingly. They mostly lured women back to us. It was easier to promise women time with a relatively successful rock band than it was men. Many of these women were just looking for a man to take care of them, so by the time Shauna and Marlene found them they were more than willing to meet the band. Their illusions of making it big as models or actresses were squashed by the many rejections that they had accumulated, so our attention was welcomed.

When we would reach in the dressing room, five women were always awaiting our arrival. Once they were there, we had to lure them away from the safety of the club and to the place where we fed. We discovered that in order to remain in the same place for extended periods of time, we couldn't feed where we slept. It would be disastrous to take people to the place in which we called home. Instead we found a place in the hills near the Hollywood sign that was secluded and the perfect place to bring people to feed. We told them we were going up to the Hollywood sign to see the sights below. Many people enjoyed the view from the sign, so it was a perfect excuse to go somewhere secluded. By the time they realized what was happening, it was too late. The last thing these women would see was the view from the hills.

Because of our local success, we had a standing gig at the Roxy for three nights and this was where my newest incarnation of Beatrice awaited me. All I knew was I had to make an impression on her and make her mine before the end of the third night. There was no way I could allow her to slip through my fingers again. I would take her any way I could get her. There were few things that would force me to not make her mine.

When we arrived the day before our first show to talk to the manager and settle any issues I got to have a small interaction with her, the bartender. She had Been behind the bar, preparing for the night when I approached to speak to her. It wasn't much of an interaction, but it was just enough to make sure that her eyes were the odd violet color that they always had Been. It was also enough to feel the pull of her body. I could feel her aura pulling at me, hear her spirit screaming for me. There was no doubt that this beauty was my Beatrice.

On that first night, just before our show, I spoke to her for the first time. We arrived before any of the patrons were allowed inside so it gave me the perfect opportunity to speak with her. It was quiet as we prepared the stage with music from the juke box playing the most popular top forty songs from the biggest bands that were taking over the air waves. While the others helped Uriah with his drum set, I took leave of them. I watched as she walked down a corridor and disappeared into a stock room. Deciding that this would be my chance to speak to her, I followed her into the room and closed the door behind me. She started at the sound of the door closing and latching behind me.

"I mean you no harm," I smiled, placing my hands up so she could see that I had no intention of harming her… yet. "I just thought you could use some help carting whatever you needed back to the bar."

She had an apprehensive look on her face, but she managed a warm smile. "Sure," she said. "I could use some help carrying the cases of booze back to the bar, if you don't mind."

I nodded and smirked causing a moment of silence while she was preparing what she needed for the night. I could feel her apprehension at my proximity. She was attracted to me, we both knew it. The problem was, she was unfamiliar with me. I needed to move this introduction phase along. She was uneasy about what she felt when I was near her or looking at her. She didn't understand the connection that she felt toward me. She didn't understand why she wanted me. I could hear her worry. She wasn't a very trusting person. She'd seen some crazy things in her life. Focusing in on her I found that she grew up with a drug addict for a mother and an abusive father. She watched her father beat her mother her whole life. She was forced to lie there when her mother allowed the drug dealers to take her daughter's innocence over and over for payment for the drugs she couldn't afford. One particular brutal night when her father was beating her mother, her older brother tried to intervene. She watched as her father killed her brother when he tried to stop the abuse. Then a couple months later she found her mother dead in the bathroom. She had overdosed after her father was convicted for killing her brother.

Once she was all alone, she decided it was inevitable. She would move to LA and do what she could to survive. She was pretty and thought maybe she could make it as a model, but she, like so many others, had no luck. She wanted to get away from the trailer park that she grew up in and that held so many terrible memories for her so she ran as far away as she could. The problem was, she couldn't get away. Those memories haunted her daily life making her sad and angry. She was young, very young, barely eighteen. But she had lived a life most would never know and her soul was old and experienced.

I could feel her desperation and hear her muddled thoughts. She was often on the cusp between being crazy happy and utterly unhappy. Her mind never seemed to stop, like she was running on high all of the time. She may have had serious psychological problems. But then again, she seemed so strong. She seemed to have become stronger because of her situation. She had a fondness for taking drugs and drinking. It seemed that she was willing to do these things to let loose and lose herself in the sensations that the narcotics gave her. This realization angered me. I didn't know if I could make this woman mine with such an addiction.

Shoving my fear behind me I tried to find a way to get her to see me for who I was, her soul mate. "What is your name, beautiful woman?" Maybe I could save her from her addiction before making her mine.

She giggled slightly, "Is that how you get all the ladies to talk to you. Flattery?"

I smiled, "No, just you. I only wish to flatter you."

Smiling she sighed, "You speak so properly, do you always do that?" She stared at me when I didn't immediately answer. I guess that was one way I never really adapted, I still spoke much like I did two centuries ago. She sighed again, "My name is Ricci . What about you?"

Another nickname for Beatrice I realized. "Is that a nickname?" I asked.

She snickered, "Yeah, my name is Beatrice. But after I came to LA I didn't want to be called that anymore. So I only go by Ricci now."

"I'm Tobias, it is nice to meet you," I said extending my hand. I had to feel her skin on mine. I had to feel the connection to make sure it was truly her.

When our hands touched it was like a spark of lightning flashed between the two of us. Her reaction to the connection was better than I could have imagined.

Looking down at our connected hands she smiled. When her eyes met mine, I could see a wealth of feeling in them. "I know this is going to sound insane," she said. "But do you feel that? Do you feel the power between us?"

I tried to act as though I didn't understand. Amar said he believed she had her own abilities or strengths. He believed she was a sensitive, like my mother. I wanted to test her to see if she truly had some kind of power within her. "What do you mean?" I asked.

"Don't you feel the connection between us? The power radiating between us and our connected hands?" she smiled looking down at our joined hands. Whispering more to herself than to me she said, "I feel like I know you. Like my body knows yours. Why is that?"

"I don't know," I smirked. "Have you ever felt connected to things in nature or that you just kind of knew what was going to happen before it did?" I wanted to try to understand the extent to which her abilities may have progressed. All of her past lives have had connections to me and to their surroundings. They were sensitive to their surroundings, innocents – they knew things before they should have. They could feel things others couldn't. And then I realized the extent of Ricci 's abilities. I could hear her thoughts about the past and future screaming in my head. Her abilities were strong, but the problem was, she used the drugs and alcohol to induce her strength. She felt that the drugs gave her unrestrained abilities that she didn't have sober. She was addicted to the feeling of candidness she had when she was inebriated and I didn't know if I would be able to take her away from it or not.

I was suddenly saddened by the fact that this beautiful woman, my Beatrice, was more broken than I originally realized. What had Been done to her in her childhood and what she had seen had broken her. She suffered daily just to make it through the day as normally as possible. She was damaged, maybe beyond repair.

Releasing her hand, I smiled. "I suppose we should get the alcohol and take it back to the bar before the crowd arrives. I do have a show to put on tonight."

~oOo~

The command over a huge crowd was something that I never realized would appeal to me. The power I felt when I walked out on that stage was equivalent to the hunt in so many ways. And the fact that the entire time we sang and played those astonishing violet eyes were on me made the experience almost erotic. It was a sort of foreplay that I had never experienced before I encountered this form of my Beatrice. Trice was attentive and willing, but Ricci was outgoing and eager. She was exceptionally rapt to my needs. Without realizing it she understood our connection better than any other of her past lives. She knew her body recognized mine. She knew she belonged with me. She also embraced her abilities where none of the others had. She knew that her body needed mine and she was enthusiastic about the idea of being with me. She just didn't understand yet how I needed her to be with me. She didn't understand what I was… yet.

After finally finding my Beatrice again, I knew I had to find a way to get closer to her. Even though after our initial meeting she seemed to be open to me and to our connection, I knew the rest would be quite a shock to discover. I used the three pre-scheduled dates that we had at the Roxy to get closer to my love. I found any reason that I could fathom to hang around the bar or to be near her. I was a constant companion for her. The more I was around her, the more I was able to infiltrate her thoughts and project my own imprints on her. I provided her images of me in different times and places. Different eras across the past two centuries. I gave her these images to confuse her a bit but also to give her insights to who I was and what shaped me. I showed her images of me with Bea, Betty, and Trice. I made sure she could see their eyes, her eyes, so she could get the feeling that these women were her from different time periods. I did everything I could to help her see the truth without coming right out and telling her. I didn't have to do this with Trice, but Trice was willing to do just about anything to get out of the situation she was in. I was a means to an end with Trice. I needed Ricci to be more aware of what I was and what we could be together. Her complete surrender to me and what I wanted to do to her, what I needed her to be was worth the slow and tedious seduction and the mind games that I was performing.

It was on the third night that I found Ricci waiting for me outside of our dressing room following our show. It was our last night head lining. From there we would travel up the coast to be part of a music festival in which many famous bands were performing. When I realized she was there and that we would be leaving, I knew I had to see her tonight and spend as much time with her as I could before we boarded our rundown bus to drive two hours north for the festival on the beach. So finding her outside my dressing room was both alluring and dangerous. I hadn't had the opportunity to feed, so her presence was both fortuitous and troublesome. She was really the only one I wanted following our show, but I knew I couldn't feed from her. I couldn't taste from her and brand her as my own. It was too soon. A part of me wanted to chase her away, but the fear of frightening her and making her regret coming to me were too much. I would have to stifle my needs for a time. I needed to see why she sought me out.

"Bee, what are you doing here?" I asked.

She worried her hands together while staring down at them. Behind the bar, she was so sociable and gregarious with her customers, she bounced around like a rabbit on speed. But in front of me she was timid and seemed nervous and almost sad. I had a hard time wrapping my head around the two very different women that occupied this one brazen beauty. Taking her in, I acknowledged her amazing violet eyes. They were so unusual and they reflected the amazingly pure woman that she was. Her dark brown hair was very curly and she made it defy gravity the way it stood straight up from her scalp. It was like a dark brown halo around her head and hanging down to the middle of her back. Along with her gravity defying hair, her make-up was also something from the times. Pinks and blues concealed her beautiful face, hiding her natural beauty. There was no doubt that the petite woman was beautiful, in spite of the make-up that she wore. Her small nose, high cheekbones, and oval face were all perfect for her. Her body was also perfect. This incarnation of Beatrice was small but strong. She had the body of a dancer.

After a few moments of staring at her tangled fingers, she looked up at me bashfully. A tentative smile graced her perfect cupid's bow of a mouth. "I really didn't get to talk to you today. I thought maybe we could hang out now."

Her words were so quiet and hesitant that if I were human I may not have heard her. But I heard every word she said. I felt them spoken in every part of my being. I worried my visions scared her, but she didn't seem scared, she seemed shy.

I smirked at her wariness, it was endearing. Her heart and her mind raced as she waited for my answer. I fed her another image in the moment it took me to register what she wanted. This one an image of Trice and me making love and me feeding from her, marking her as mine.

Bee drew in a sharp breath at the vision, looking at me in wonder and fear. She didn't know if she should be afraid of me or excited by me. The idea that I could be this man that she envisioned was both thrilling and terrifying to her. I could feel the anticipation radiating off of her, the end of the vision showed my icy blue, unnatural eyes and my elongated teeth stained with Trice's blood, her blood. It showed what I really am. But she didn't run and she didn't cower, she simply smiled and looked at me in anticipation. Her mind a jumble of thoughts, anxiety, eagerness, curiosity, and affection. She didn't understand her feelings and she didn't understand the connection, but she knew she wanted me.

"Yeah, sure. Just give me a minute to clean up," I told her. "Wait here for me, okay?"

"Yeah, okay." Her tentative smile making me want to hurry.

I entered our dressing room with the guys were already making the women brought for them swoon. The women were ready and willing to go anywhere they wanted them too. When one of the women approached me I pushed her away.

"Zeke, I need to talk to you. Ricci wants to spend some time with me."

"But you need to feed," he finished for me. Grabbing the one meant for me, together we drug her to the alley where he slashed one of her wrists while I sunk my teeth into her other wrist. She let out a strangled squeak before she was overcome by the sight of me drinking from her. Humans frequently were mesmerized by the sight of us devouring them. I quickly drank while her other wrist had blood falling to the ground. We had become very good at staging suicides, and this was just one way we found that allows us to continue our nightly hunting without alerting the authorities to our presence. If they knew we were there, we would be hunted relentlessly. Our power not only rested with what we could do, but also with our ability to blend in with humanity. Our greatest power was in our ability to convince the world we didn't exist, that we were nothing but a figment of their imagination or the storyline for horror movies and books.

We staged the scene so it was clear that she was hiding in the alley and slit her wrists. With the passage of time, humans' investigative abilities had progressed so significantly that I wondered what would come in the future. If they would be able to determine the difference between staged suicide and the real thing. Or if the idea of vampires living among them would be so ludicrous that they would never believe where the evidence took them anyway.

Leaving my mates, I returned to Ricci waiting outside of our dressing room. She smiled upon seeing me in the doorway, freshly showered. Taking her hand without a word, I allowed more visions of myself over the last two centuries to filter into her consciousness. Images from my past and recent images of me performing and then taking my victims to the hills to feed. I gave her as much as I could without speaking.

Taking her in my car, we drove in silence until we reached the beach. I thought it was the best and most secluded place to take her. If she had questions or decided to talk about the visions she was having I wanted to make sure that there was no one else around to interfere. If not she could consider this a romantic place for me to take her. Maybe it would help her to open up to me. I could feel the desperation in her to ask her questions, she just wasn't brave enough to delve into that conversation. Hopefully this would help her to relax.

We walked down the dark secluded beach. The waves crashing on the sand was lulling to the senses. The spray from the salty ocean water, bringing a chill into the air. It was one of my favorite places, reminding of my time in New Orleans visiting the Gulf of Mexico as a young man before everything in my life when to shit. The silent conversation between the ocean and the moon, the back and forth pull of gravity was an exact metaphor for how I was drawn to this woman. Like the moon, she pulled me to her until I found her. She continued to pull me into her grasp with every incarnation of her being, each one stronger than the last, like the phases of the moon. Would this be the full moon that causes the most extreme waves or was this just another piece of the woman that was meant to be mine?

I was deep in myself when I felt her suddenly stop and stiffen. I looked up into her beautiful violet eyes and watched her. She had a look of shock and amazement on her face and I suddenly worry that I was projecting my thoughts.

She stepped back from me, looking at me in awe, "Is it true? What I've seen, is it real?"

Keeping the pretense of confusion, I delved deeper into the depths of her eyes and tried to get a read on her thoughts. They were a cluttered mess of my projections, her own thoughts, her past, her present, and her muddled feelings. It's no wonder this woman was confused by me. She couldn't keep her head straight when they were just her thoughts, now because of me the confusion was worse.

"What are you talking about? Is what real?"

"You… You're a… a vampire. I thought my dreams were just that, dreams. I thought that what I was imagining and daydreaming about was just my overactive imagination. But you are, aren't you? The visions of you in New Orleans, in Paris, in San Diego in the 60's. Seeing you with a woman that looked like me in the past, it's all real." She was breathless when she stopped talking and I was not entirely sure if she was mesmerized or if she was terrified.

She looked at me, confusion lit up her elfin features. It occurred to me in that moment how truly petite and elflike this woman was. She was beautiful and elegant and completely magnificent. The way the moon shown on her dark hair making it shine burgundy in the light, her violet eyes shining with specks of gold, her perfect face and body all made me want her more than I have ever wanted any incarnation of her in the past. The problem was, her affliction to drugs like cocaine. I didn't know what kind of effects it would have on a vampire to be addicted to such drugs. It also made me realize that I would never be able to taste her like I did Trice. The drugs in her system would weaken me and make me vulnerable, and like William, I wouldn't fall victim because of such a mistake.

Her thoughts were jumbled with everything that she was feeling and seeing in that moment, it was impossible to sort it out. But then I realized, part of her problem with her jumbled thoughts was that she was intoxicated on cocaine and alcohol. The sad reality hit me that I would never be able to take her and make her mine. Not this way. She would ever truly understand, not with her so inebriated that I could probably convince her that unicorns were real. She would never be able to understand the depth with which I needed to keep this secret, not just for me but for my mates.

With resigned realization I decided to lie to her. To make her believe that she was crazy. "What?" I exclaim with as much shock and confusion as I could. "What are you talking about? Vampires?! Are you raving mad, woman?"

A look of shock and disbelief to my reaction covered her face. "I… I know that you are. I've seen it in my dreams and my dreams are never wrong."

"Well, I'm not a vampire. I'm just a man." Pausing for a moment to allow my words to seep through her drug induced haze, I continued, "Maybe it's time I return you to the bar or take you home. This was obviously a bad idea."

Her shock and sadness washed over me. I couldn't help feeling the connection to this woman and I hated lying to her. But self-preservation had to rule over my desperate need to be with her. There could never be anything with this woman with the amount of drugs that invaded her system. She couldn't seem to function without them. And I didn't know if I could function without her.


	16. Semi Charmed Life

Chapter 16

Semi Charmed Life

After my encounter with Ricci and realizing her addiction was far worse than I anticipated, I returned to the house that we were occupying and found Amar waiting for me. He simply sat on the couch awaiting my return, watching my face when I entered the house. It had Been a long time since Amar waited for me to return from a night out.

I gave him an exaggerated sigh, letting him know that he could ask his questions.

"What has happened, young one? I could feel your desperation from across the city. It echoed on the winds and filled me with dread and sadness."

Amar's profound connection to me never ceased to amaze me. But it was that connection that made me more worried about Ricci. She was so sure about what she knew that I worried that it could harm the others. Although the pull to this place was so strong, it might be time to fight the pull and move on.

"I am starting to think that this connection to this woman is doomed for eternity. I can't take her, I am starting to wonder if she was every actually meant to be mine. Something always seems to keep her from me."

Amar looked at me with concern. He didn't seem to understand the problem or what was provoking these feelings. "Can you please explain? I have not Been with you through each encounter."

I sighed at my old friend. Astonished at his concern. His overly handsome face looked almost too perfect to be real. His Marlene skin and dark hair looked exactly the same as it had all those years ago. But the fire that burned behind his eyes had died some. His raging fury that was once so evident to me had dulled greatly. Maybe it was time to voice my concern.

"I worry that her soul is damaged," I began. "Beatrice was young, mostly raised by the church. She was the orphan of a murdered prostitute and an unknown father. Bea was the daughter of a murdered gangster and the caretaker for her family in the middle of mob wars. Betty was taken from her home in Austria and forced to be a nurse for the German army. She had watched her parents and siblings suffer and die at the hands of the men that took her. But those three women seemed to overcome the obstacles in their lives. They were all still pure and innocent. But then Trice came around and was a prostitute who was addicted to sex and being dominated, even before I held her for all those days. And Ricci, she's a drug addict and alcoholic. I also think she has some kind of psychological problems. Although Ricci seems to be more in touch with her abilities, she uses drugs and alcohol to escape reality. The purity and innocence of the first three women has changed, these women have Been damaged by their lives."

Amar looked at me, I could feel his concern radiating from him. "What do you intend to do about it?"

"I can't change her. I think I'm just going to walk away from this one. I don't know if I can save her." I pause and sigh, "Maybe I was wrong."

Concern morphing to confusion, Amar furrowed his brow at me and cocked his head questioningly. Silently asking me what I meant. I was thankful for this confidant over the last century. He had Been a constant guide for me. Without him, I did not know where this life would have taken me, especially when I grew weary of Max.

"What were you wrong about?"

I sigh, "Maybe I was wrong about being connected to this woman. Or maybe I was wrong about destiny. I never believed in destiny, but maybe I was wrong. Maybe I'm not meant to be with this woman at all. The one thing I don't understand is why she calls to me."

"I don't know about destiny, Tobias. In my many years, I've seen evidence that destiny may really exist. But what I know is that this woman is connected to you for one reason or another. It may be because she belongs with you. It may just be because your paths are meant to cross for one reason or another. The problems with any theory that I could come up with is, to believe in them you need to believe in something bigger than yourself. If that is destiny or some higher power, I don't know. But there is something to the fact that the same woman has crossed your path multiple times. It may take an eternity to find out why. But in my opinion I think there is a reason that you meet her. Our lives are intertwined with those that we are meant to be with. I believe there is more to this than you are seeing. Maybe the fates are waiting until you are both ready, in the same place at the same time."

"Why would the fates or destiny care if I was with this woman or not."

"There is always more to every story, young one. Maybe someday it will be time for you to learn more. But for now, it is probably best that you realize that this one is not meant to be."

Although our conversation didn't fix anything, it helped. The next week took us out of town, traveling along the west coast playing in the festival and then bars and clubs in the area. Being away from her and feeling the connection to her loosening its grip on me also helped. I was able to see things a little clearer, but I still had no answers. The only thing I was sure about was the fact that this incarnation of my Beatrice had more of an effect on me than any of the others.

After our small tour, we returned to Los Angeles and to our lives. We were taking a few days to ourselves before playing Whisky-a-go-go and some other clubs in the area. The long awaited break hopefully would help me put my situation into perspective and help me to understand and deal with the situation with Ricci.

Two days after our return I went in search of Ricci. I was hoping to find her in a better condition than before. I hoped that she was coherent enough to have a real conversation with me. When I found her at the Roxy, she seemed depressed but sober. This version of her was at least real, the manic drug user that I had encountered previously was exhausting and frustrating. At least when her mood shifted and she was down, she was at least tolerable. Then I realized, I had never seen her on the level. She was always high or low, there was no happy medium with this girl. If she was high, she was high on life, on chemicals, and on whatever was going on in her head. If she was low, she was usually sober or drinking alcohol that took her even lower. She was depressed and acted as though the world was out to get her. Nothing in her life would ever go right when she was on a low.

I went to her at the bar and felt her stiffen and heard her gasp when she saw me in front of her.

"What are you doing here, Tobias?"

"I came to see you," I explained. I didn't know what I was hoping for. A warm welcome? For her to launch herself in my arms and wrap her arms around me? I had no idea.

"You returned days ago. I think you made it perfectly clear the last time that we were together and with the fact that you didn't call or visit when you got back, that this is over. I don't even know what this is, but I'm pretty sure it's over."

Her thoughts screamed for me to prove her wrong. She wanted to be with me, she wanted me to want her like she wanted me. But I could also feel her despair and hear her desperation. She was on a low, lower than I have ever imagined a human could go. It was then that I read the imprint of her future. If the sadness continued, and she continued on the path that she found herself on, it would kill her. I couldn't see exactly how it would kill her, but I was sure of it.

I had to find a way to save her. Maybe that was what all of this was about, saving her. But something like that would force me to believe in something that I didn't think I could ever believe in. The idea that something was driving the universe was too farfetched for me. All I was sure of was she needed saving, from herself.

Leaning in to her so that she could hear me, I whispered, "I'd like to take you out of here for a while. What do you say?"

With a wary sigh, she nodded and rounded the bar. She looked thinner than she had just a week ago. Her body almost seemed frail, like if it were touched the wrong way it would shatter. Her normally bright violet eyes were dull in comparison and even her shiny brown hair was lackluster at best. She looked like she was fraying at the seams; barely holding herself together.

The early evening was lit bright with the billboards and signs advertising various bands and acts gracing the stages of the clubs in the area. This was the mecca of every want-to-be musician, comedian, and actress. Desire and unfulfilled dreams dripped from every building, lamppost, and billboard. The streets teamed with men and women trying to realize some sort of fantasy that they concocted in their trailer parks, farms, or small towns that they grew up in. Someone probably told them that they were beautiful, handsome, or talented. Someone probably told them that they could be a star. Fostering some kind of unrealistic aspiration to build their confidence only to be smothered by the blanket of rejection and disapproval.

Bee was just like the rest, but she didn't harbor any false hopes about becoming rich or famous. She only believed that she could find a life in a place like this. She thought she could come to a place like Hollywood or LA and find the life that she desired. All she had found was constant disappointment and dissatisfaction.

She looked to me like I could be the one to save her from the merry-go-round that her life had become. She desperately wanted off the ride and to find some kind of solid ground beneath her. I could feel and hear that she still believed that I was her savior. She still believed that I was her knight in shining armor. She also still believed that I was a vampire. In spite of my ardent denial, she believed and thought that I could take her away from the life she had and into a new life. But even with all that she believed, her depression and addiction were still prevalent and ruled her life.

We rode through the city to the outskirts where I took all of my victims. Even though we used the Hollywood sign to lure our prey from the prying eyes of the city and into our grasp, I wouldn't do that with her. I couldn't turn a human that was weak, and Ricci was very weak. All that she had seen as a child, all that she was running from made her a liability that I could not subject myself or the others to.

When we arrived at the sign and removed ourselves from the car, we walked the path to look out over the city. The view was spectacular, but the feeling of sadness coming from Ricci was like drowning in all of the emotions that I felt when I was first learning about my abilities. I could feel her sinking fast into the pit of despair and even my presence didn't seem to break the spell. It might have Been my presence that enhanced it.

We stood quietly for a while, just looking out over the city lights. Ricci in her own world, me reading through her muddled thoughts and fragmented feelings. This girl was broken, possibly beyond repair. But I had to attempt to help her. I had to find some way to reach her. I couldn't see what would bring about this girl's demise and I had no idea if I could even save her from whatever it would be. But I had to try. But then I also wondered if it would be me. Maybe I would be what broke this girl. Maybe I couldn't help her. Maybe, just maybe, she was beyond help.

Sucking in a deep breath, she looked at me. The sadness in her eyes and in her thoughts vibrated from her. She gave me the slightest of smiles. I don't know what she was trying to show me or what she was trying to do, but the smile was hollow.

"What are we doing here, Tobias?"

Looking out over the lights of the city, I said, "I love the view from here. It's calming."

Shaking her head, her thoughts were screaming for me to take her. To take her away from her thoughts, from her feelings, from everything that made her human. But outside she only looked downtrodden and ready to give up. Everything about her was at war with herself. It had to be exhausting to live in her head, because it was tiring for me to be privy to her inner turmoil.

"Look, I don't know what this is about, but I'm fine. I'm not mad at you for not calling or for waiting so long to come see me. It's fine really. I was just talking without thinking first. Spouting off about nonsense."

I nodded, but didn't acknowledge her words. What she said aloud was a far cry from what was inside of her head. I didn't know what to do about how down she was. The depression was smothering her more now than it was earlier.

"Will you come to our show in a couple nights? We're playing Whisky a Go-Go and I would love to be able to see you out there watching me."

"I don't know, Tobias. That would mean that I would have to take a night off and I don't think I can do that."

Sighing I shrugged. I was just trying to find a way to get her to have fun without the need of artificial stimulants to make her happy. But I didn't have any idea of how to lead her down a better path. She had to want to be better, but I was starting to think she liked her mood swings and the way she dealt with them.

She took in a deep breath and smiled slightly, "You know what I'll try."

I nodded, "Thanks."

We stood in silence for a while longer. Her thoughts were a mess of what-ifs and melancholy.

When I returned her to the Roxy, she seemed to be lifted just a little. Maybe this night out wasn't such a bad idea after all. Only she could break herself out of the cycle that she entered, following in her mother's footsteps of addiction. I could only hope to guide her out of the darkness that surrounded her when she was ready.

Two nights later, we were setting up our equipment at the Whisky when Marlene burst on to the stage.

"Tobias, something's happened at the Roxy. I'm not sure what is going on. But when I went to get Ricci like you asked. She was locked in the employee lounge and wouldn't let anyone in."

Without a word to my friends, I moved into the shadows and propelled myself to the Roxy. To the place where Ricci had been hiding. Knowing I couldn't just appear in the room where she was holed up, I transported myself to the alley and entered through the back entrance.

One of her co-workers was standing outside of the room, pounding on the door desperately asking Ricci to open up. She looked worried.

"What happened?" I asked when I approached.

"It's Ricci. She was fine, then she got a phone call from someone. After she hung up, she was talking crazy. Talking about vampires and becoming a vampire so she could be with some guy. She said she had to get changed so she could become what he needed. She said she was going to go out and try to find someone to change her. She was crazy. She started going around asking people to bite her and drain her so she could become something better, something more. When we tried to explain that there is no such thing as vampires, she lost it. Started screaming and yelling and telling us that she would prove it. She tried to grab a knife and cut herself with it. She said that if she was dying that the vampire would have no choice but to save her. That he would smell her blood and come. By the time we got her restrained and the knife from her, she seemed to have calmed. Then she started crying and apologizing. She said that she needed a minute and came back here. That was an hour ago. She's Been locked in there ever since."

Fear and worry took over. I knocked on the door and called to her, but she didn't respond. I could hear her weeping through the door. But what worried me more than anything was the fact that her thoughts were completely incoherent. I couldn't decipher them at all.


	17. I Remember You

Chapter 17

I Remember You

Ricci

Walking into work, I felt better than I had for a while. My head was a bit fuzzy from the hit of cocaine that I had taken that morning but I was feeling pretty good.

Tonight I was going to see Tobias and his band play at the Whisky and I was pretty excited about it. I knew he was different than other guys. He swore that he wasn't a vampire, but I knew what I saw in my dreams and in my thoughts. I saw the two of us in the past, together, loving each other and doing things that only lovers do. He always looked the same, but even though I was positive it was me I was seeing, I always looked different. But I felt it deep down in my gut, I knew it was me. This man, vampire, was my soul mate. I belonged to him, we belonged to each other and tonight was going to be the night that I proved that to him. I would convince him to take me and make me his immortal bride. I let out a snicker, I've Been reading too many vampire stories… immortal bride… am I going insane or what?

I went through my day of work as usual, my mood rising with every minute and hour that passed. I felt like my life was finally going to begin, that I was finally going to be able to be who I was meant to be without all that I had experienced as a child. No longer would those men take what was mine from me. No longer would the memories and the horror slowly kill what was inside of me. None of that mattered anymore. It was a different life, the here and now was all that mattered to me. I wouldn't let it drag me down anymore.

That was until the phone rang. I didn't bother answering it since the waitress, Heather, was there. Then she came over to me with a smile, "Hey Ricci, phone's for you."

"Did they say who it is?" I asked, confused. No one ever called me at work. No one ever really called me. It was strange.

"Nope, just asked for you."

Nodding, I walked over to the phone at the end of the bar. It was still early, so it would be private enough. Heather went back to preparing her tables for the night while the other waitresses moved around the room doing the same. It may not be fame and fortune, but I liked this job. It kept me busy and it was worth it to see all of the bands and other acts that came through.

Sitting on one of the high-back stools by the bar I picked up the receiver to see what this was all about.

"Hello? This is Ricci, how can I help you?"

"Beatrice?"

That voice, the disembodied voice that I heard every night in my nightmares echoed through my ears and into the darkest depths of my soul. I hadn't heard that voice since the night he murdered my brother, but I would never forget the voice that haunted me every day for as long as I could remember.

I was frozen, too terrified to speak. A million questions raced through my mind as I tried to pick out one single thought, one truth that I could focus on. Why wasn't I hanging up on him? How did he find me? How was he calling me from jail? I didn't understand what was happening. My body started to tremble, my hands shook with the realization that I wasn't safe anymore. I needed Tobias. I needed that strength that I felt when I was near him. But he wasn't here and I had no way of contacting him. I didn't know his phone number, I didn't even know where he lived or what he did when he wasn't singing in front of his band.

Before I could respond or even hang up, the disembodied voice spoke again. Causing me to freeze. I swear I couldn't breathe, that my lungs seized at the sound of his voice and his words. If I wasn't breathing, then how could I be alive? How could I still be standing here? My blood ran cold at the thought that this man still had this kind of control over my body and my mind.

"I know where you are now Beatrice and I'll finally be coming for you. All you have to do is wait for me there. I know you can't go anywhere. I've had some friends that I made on the inside keep track of you for me. They found you and have Been watching you for months. So don't pretend that you are going to run from me, because I know you can't."

My stomach tumbled thinking about what greasy men have Been watching me so closely. Then I thought about Tobias again. He was almost too good to be true, maybe he was who my father was referring to. Oh god, what if Tobias wasn't who I thought he was at all.

"Who? When? How?" I barely whispered. Three questions that I had to have answered, but could barely verbalize.

"The who? That is unimportant. You would have never have noticed them in such a packed bar anyway. Now the when, the when will be sooner than you could dream. And the How? Well, the how is also unimportant. Just know that I am coming for you… tonight."

With that the line went dead and my mind went blank. The thought of this man reentering my life was horrifying and made me ill with all of the memories his voice provoked. When Heather came back over to the bar, she could see my change. She could see my body quake as I stood stone still not able to focus on anything.

"Bee, what's wrong?" she asked.

"Tobias. I need Tobias. He can help me. He's a vampire. He's strong and powerful. He can make me strong and powerful too. I need him to help me. To save me from this man. He's going to kill me. I need Tobias so I can be what he needs and so he can take care of me. He's a vampire. I know he is. He swears he isn't, but I know he is. I just know it."

"Ricci honey, why don't you go back into the break room and rest? I'll take care of everything out here."

"No, you don't understand. I need to become a vampire tonight. I need to be able to get away from him. He's coming for me. He knows where I am. He found me. He's coming. I can't be weak. I need to be strong. I need Tobias to come and make me his. I need him to turn me into a vampire with him so I can be strong and defend myself. He's coming. He knows I was bad. He knows… he KNOWS… HE KNOWS…"

"Ricci, there's no such thing as vampires."

"Yes, there are! I can prove it! Give me a knife. He'll smell my blood, he'll come for me. He needs me as much as I need him!"

"Ricci…"

"Don't Ricci me," I shouted. I grabbed a knife and held it to my wrist. Backing away from Heather and the others that had gathered, I pressed the metal to my flesh. I needed to get away from my father. I needed to be stronger than him, this was the only way I could be stronger. I had to beat him to it. I had to beat him.

"Someone bite me, he won't have a choice but to change me if someone has already bitten me. I know there are vampires here. There has to be, they're everywhere. Everywhere I look, there here, I know they are."

Holding her hands up to me, Heather approached me, "Ricci honey, please. Give me the knife. You don't want to hurt yourself. You need to calm down. There are no vampires, honey. It's just us, your co-workers and friends. Remember?"

No vampires… no vampires… no… vampires? How can there be no vampires? I knew Tobias was a vampire. I knew it. I saw the visions. But he said he wasn't a vampire, he said there are no vampires. No vampires…

Dropping the knife with a clang, I dropped to the floor and smacked my head to my hands. No vampires… no… vampires.

"Ricci, are you okay now honey? Why don't we take a break? Get some fresh air or something."

I sat silently for a moment, he was coming for me. He was going to find me and take control again. I couldn't let him do that. I had to be stronger than him. I had to escape. My only escape was to become what Tobias needed me to be. I had to prove that I was worthy of being with him, forever. Only then could I be stronger. Only then could I beat my father and be what Tobias deserved. I had to escape to prove to Tobias that I could handle it, I could live forever with him. I was strong enough.

Feeling a hand wrap around the back of my elbow, I was led down the corridor to a room. Heather sat me down on the seat and smiled. But it wasn't a real smile. I didn't understand what she was smiling about. He was coming for me. He was going to punish me for being bad. He was going to make me do things that I didn't want to do. I couldn't be here when he got here. I couldn't.

"Honey, sit down."

"NO! I need Tobias. I need him to change me so I can be strong! I need my vampire to change me. Please."

The desperation in my voice almost surprised me, but then again, it didn't. I needed him.

"I'll go find him, okay?"

She'd go get Tobias? Tobias was coming to me? But what if he didn't like that I told people that he was a vampire? What if he got mad at me? My mind was a jumble, I couldn't think, I couldn't focus. My father was coming for me. He was looking for me. He was going to make me do things like he used to. He was going to…

My whole body started trembling. I was burning up… freezing… terrified. I couldn't focus. Tobias couldn't see me like that. I had to calm down. But how could I calm down knowing my father was coming for me? He was coming. I had to hide, I had to make sure he couldn't get to me. I moved across the room and locked the door. No one would get me here. Only Tobias could get in. He could use is powers and come to me. I was still shaking. I had to be strong. I had to show Tobias I was strong for him. I had to calm down. I could do what needed done. I needed drained so that Tobias could make me his. He could make me strong. But I had to get drained so he could fill me with him immortal blood. I collapsed on the floor in front of my locker. My cocaine was in there. That would calm my nerves, it would take the edge off and help me think straight again. It could help me find the strength to really be strong. I could do that, make myself strong so that Tobias could see my strength. Crawling up onto my knees, I pulled my purse from my locker, and dug until I found what I need. The thing that would fix my mind and my nerves. But it wasn't there. The vial with my stash wasn't there. But where did it go?

I started to shake more. Who took my stuff? Who went into my bag and took it? Anger filtered in through the fear. I knew someone took my stuff. I started to rummage in the other lockers, throwing everything on the floor, going through everyone's things in order to find what was mine. I needed to find something to clear my head and help me to calm down. In one of the lockers I found a blank bottle of blue pills. They looked like something that might be able to help me calm down and see straight again.

Propping myself up on the lockers I opened the bottle and poured some of the pills in my hand. Without counting I emptied my hand into my mouth and swallowed them. Choking on some of them as they went down. Strong… I needed to be strong… I needed to be ready for Tobias when he came. Heather was going to go get him for me so I could be strong. I needed to be drained so he could take care of me. I needed him to take me and make me strong. My father wouldn't make me do things for him again. I wouldn't do it. I needed to be stronger. I wasn't a child anymore. Not a baby. I've Been on my own for years. I was strong. I was powerful. I…

Noticing a bottle of whisky on the bar, I struggled to stand, I needed to walk across the room and grab that bottle of whisky. The pills weren't calming me fast enough. I needed the liquid courage to do be strong. I stumbled back toward the lockers only to plop back down on the floor by the couch with my whisky and my bottle of special pills. The whisky made me giggle. I would see Tobias at the Whisky tonight and I was drinking whisky, but I had to calm the hell down first. I had to stop and focus so I could be calm enough to tell him I needed him to change me so I could be stronger. But I needed drained too. Would he do it? Would he take from me then give back?

Whisky. The whisky burned as I took another drink from the bottle. My hands and body were still trembling. The few pills I took weren't working. I needed to calm down. I poured a few more into my hand and downed them with the whisky this time so they went down easier. Taking a deep breath I decided to try again to find my cocaine. I needed it. It would help more than these stupid pills were helping. They weren't helping at all. They were taking too long to calm me down. I crawled toward my bag lying on the floor to search for my vial.

Inside one of the pockets in my bag was the vial that I thought I'd lost. Thank god I found it. I can't believe I missed it there. I crawled back over to the table so I could pour some out and cut a line. This was hard to do because of my shaking hands and my fuzzy head. I needed this, steady hand, to calm down. Then I had to be strong and get ready for Tobias. He would come for me and take me, he would make me strong. I had to squint my eyes to focus on the task. I took another drink of the vodka and used my rolled up five dollar bill to inhale the thing that would bring me the most relief.

The effect was instant. The deep breath along with the feel of the drug entering my system was a relief to my mind. But my body was still shaking. My mind felt clearer, but the abject terror of that phone call still coursed through my body. I needed to calm down. I took another large gulp of the whisky and finished what was left of the blue pills in the bottle before I slumped on the floor, trying to reign in my fear.

My father was coming. I needed to be strong and the only thing that would save me was Tobias turning me. But my memory of our conversation from before he left hung over me. He insisted he wasn't a vampire. He insisted that whatever I thought I saw in my dreams was somehow a mistake. That what I felt in my gut was wrong. But my gut was never wrong. Tears made tracks down my cheeks as I thought about Tobias and what he was and what he meant to me. I felt an instant connection to the man with the amazing blue eyes. I needed him. But what if he really wasn't a vampire? Then what would I do? My father was coming and no one would be able to help me. No one would be able to save me. I would be made to suffer by the man who took everything from me when I was a child. He took my innocence, he took my brother, he took my mother, and he took my life. I wouldn't give it to him again. I couldn't give him my life again and what if he took Tobias from me this time? Then he would surely take everything. But he couldn't take everything if he couldn't get me. I had to be stronger than him. I had to be better than him. I needed Tobias to take me.

I tried to stand, I would find Tobias myself. I needed him now. But I stumbled, the whisky bottle smashed to the ground, and somehow I was lying on my side. I had to do this now. He would have no choice but to change me to make me stronger. He was coming, Tobias was coming for me. I could feel it.

~oOo~

Tobias

Fear and worry settled deep in my bones as I briefly contemplated what to do about Ricci. I had to know what she was doing in there and if she was okay. She seemed to be getting better after our visit to the Hollywood sign, but now I'm not so sure. I wish I understood what was happening with her and the extreme ups and downs that her mood took.

I pounded on the door and called out to her louder this time. I begged and pleaded with her to just open the door and let me in. The strangled whimper that I heard come through the door sent me into a panic. I reared back and slammed my shoulder into the door as hard and fast as I could. Using all of my strength, I busted the door in with little effort, and ran inside to find her.

The sight that I found was haunting. She was lying on her side in a pool of her own blood and vomit. An empty bottle of pills next to her on the floor, a broken bottle of whisky, and an empty vial of cocaine and power on the table next to her. The blood was coming from what looked like deep gouges in her wrists and she was convulsing. The sound of her heart echoed though me as it raced but started to stutter in her chest. I knew the amount of blood on the floor was enough to kill her, along with whatever pills and other drugs she had in her system. In a matter of moments I knew she was already gone, even if her heart was still fluttering. There was no way someone could come back from something like this.

The girl that was in the hall came in behind me and let out a blood chilling scream when she saw Ricci lying in a pool of her own blood and vomit. She collapsed to her knees and started sobbing, mumbling to herself about not checking on her sooner. Through her tear streaked eyes, she focused on me and looked like she was a child begging me to help her, to help Ricci.

"Go, call an ambulance. Tell them that she overdosed and to hurry," I commanded.

Without a word she stumbled to her feet sobbing as she went to the phone on the other side of the room to call for help. I knew the ambulance would be too late. They would never be able to save this girl from herself. I didn't think I would ever be able to save her either. Five times I've found this amazing creature and five times I've lost her. Every death came without a word or understanding. Was her soul just so damaged that she would never be able to find peace?

I sat and tried desperately to read her fading thoughts. I wiped her hair from her face and tried to sooth her racing mind. In her thoughts she saw her past lives lived once again in those moments before death found her. She lived this life again also. But then I saw destruction and people fleeing. I knew nothing of this vision. I didn't know what it meant or what it would mean for me or for Beatrice. Her last coherent thought was of me. She saw me clear as day as I always was. Always the same, the world ever changing around me, but I was always the same.

Her heart started to race, her mind a jumble of useless thoughts and memories that bled into one another before it all stalled. She was gone.

The ambulance arrived shortly after her last heartbeat faltered and stopped completely. They attempted everything they could to resuscitate her, but nothing worked. As I already knew. Ricci was gone. Once again I was left with more questions and more confusion than I ever had before. One thing I knew for sure was the last vision was a vision of the future. Had she seen her future death or was that of an event in the future. If I could figure it out, then I might be able to save her.


	18. Behind Blue Eyes

Chapter 18

Behind Blue Eyes

After Ricci's death I felt the weight of everything that happened suffocating me. I didn't know what to do to make things better, so I started pouring every emotion and feeling into the music that we wrote. All I did for months and then years following her death was write music and perform with the others. The pain and anger was unbearable and it made me want to be both withdrawn and to take my anger out on the world. There were many days that I wanted to do nothing more than hide but then there were days that I was ready to burn down the world for all of the cruelty that I witnessed and felt on a daily basis. Humanity was a flawed creature, so flawed that I wondered how long their rule on this planet would be.

My melancholy helped propel our band. We started touring further than LA and the surrounding cities. We were traveling across the west coast and starting to receive local radio play. But no matter how successful we were or how busy we got, I was nothing. I felt nothing inside. I couldn't allow myself to connect with humanity. I was afraid of the consequences. Always connected to their collective consciousness, I was afraid of what I would become if I let myself really feel anything again. Also I worried about our rising popularity. We became musicians because it seemed like an easy way to lure our prey to us, I didn't think any of us ever really expected to see any popularity from it. But the more we played, the larger our following was becoming. I didn't think this was a good idea any longer. There was no way it would ever end well. With the popularity and recognition, I became more of a recluse. I hid in the house we rented for days at a time without leaving. I did everything I could to remove myself from the overwhelming feelings that humanity spewed in their wake, but I was having a hard time shutting off my abilities. The only time I let anything rise to the surface was when I was writing music. It seemed to be the only outlet that I had that wouldn't hurt everyone that I came into contact with. I knew my friends were fearful of me because I hadn't really expressed what I was feeling when Ricci died. But her death was so horrific and there were so many questions unanswered, that could never be answered, that I didn't know if I could ever let any of it in again.

She had killed herself. But not only had she done that, she had taken enough drugs to kill five humans in my opinion. She was trying to drown out something in her head, but whatever it was I would never know. Her co-workers were able to shed some light on her behavior prior finding her, but very little was really known. Ricci had been in a good mood, she was happy and calm, more so than any of them had seen in a long time. But then she received a phone call from an unknown man and that was what seemed to have set off her manic episode.

She had Been yelling and talking about becoming a vampire to become strong. She had to be strong for 'Tobias' and she had to be strong to defeat 'him'. That was what she continuously told everyone around her. I couldn't find out who 'he' was because after finding her dead, the Roxy shut down out of respect for her for a few days. Whoever was coming for her, would never have to be confronted with any of what happened because he would have immediately heard that she was dead. I would never find out what and who set her over the edge to make her kill herself.

The more I sat there and thought about her and what happened the worse things got. My anger and annoyance with everyone and everything around me caused me to have a short temper. My utter sadness overwhelmed those around me. I unwittingly projected my feelings to everyone in my reach. Humans that came within contact of me were overwhelmed with either sadness or anger. My friends were feeling the effects of my emotional instability also, all but Amar. Zeke wasn't influenced by it all of the time, but the rest were and it hit them at times that they didn't expect it. It was only after they had some kind of fight that they realized they were working out someone else's feelings. The longer my despair went on, the more Max and the girls separated themselves from me. They couldn't handle my subconscious emotional intrusions, and being weaker than the rest, they couldn't shut them out either.

The only good thing that came out of the bad place that I found myself in was my music. I did my best to channel my anger and sadness into the lyrics I wrote. None of them would ever understood what I was going through, not really. They didn't have the connections to their surroundings like I had. The words poured from me easily. I really believed that no one could ever understand what it was like to be me. They couldn't understand the power in me or what it was like to have the kind of emotional connection to humanity that I had. I almost wished I didn't have the power that I had. I would have preferred to be more like Max or the girls. Their powers were nothing special, but that was okay. They got by just fine living day by day, oblivious to the troubles that humanity faced within themselves and with each other. But why would they need to know that? They were able to hunt without worry, where as I could hear the humans thoughts about their families, their problems, all of it. Their thoughts were like a minefield for me. So no, none of them could ever really know what it was like to be me.

After one particularly bad day, I couldn't get the thoughts of Ricci out of my head. I replayed our interactions, her behavior, and what happened to her over and over, trying to make sense of it all. The more I thought about Ricci, the more I thought about every incarnation of Beatrice. There was little doubt that I loved her. But I began to believe that I was fated to never have her as my own. The more I thought about this, the more the words poured from me. The song that I created from these feelings became the anthem for which I lived and for which our band was propelled into semi-stardom.

_Behind Blue Eyes_

_No one knows what it's like_

_To be the bad man_

_To be the sad man_

_Behind blue eyes_

_And no one knows_

_What it's like to be hated_

_To be fated to telling only lies_

_But my dreams they aren't as empty_

_As my conscience seems to be_

_I have hours, only lonely_

_My love is vengeance_

_That's never free_

_No one knows what it's like_

_To feel these feelings_

_Like I do, and I blame you!_

_No one bites back as hard_

_On their anger_

_None of my pain and woe_

_Can show through_

_No one knows what it's like_

_To be mistreated, to be defeated_

_Behind blue eyes_

_No one knows how to say_

_That they're sorry and don't worry_

_I'm not telling lies_

_No one knows what it's like_

_To be the bad man, to be the sad man_

_Behind blue eyes._

The song that I created from my pain became very popular at all of our shows. We were approached by a record producer to make a live demo of the song at one of our shows. But once the song was recorded, all semblance of our normal and quiet life disappeared with our anonymity. All of the sudden the feelings that I poured out on the paper were being heard across the western part of the United States. No one would ever really understand the extent of the anger and sadness that were a part of that song, but it seemed that many people connected with it. Because of the popularity of the song, our band was thrust into the limelight. Our once antisocial band was suddenly forced to answer questions about our influences and how we felt about the popularity of our song. The worst was being forced to be part of something that we never desired to be a part of. We didn't seek fame, it found us. For most, it was a dream come true, for us, it was a total nightmare. We were forced to hide even more than ever before. We constantly worried that we would be caught feeding or someone would notice something was different about us. Or that the some of the people that surrounded us were never seen again.

And through the fame and hiding, I still suffered. I still felt the pain that weighed me down. No one would ever know what it was like to be me, not really.

Our popularity grew and the record producers' desire to push us to record more became a constant problem within our group. Amar, Zeke, and I all agreed that the popularity was a huge problem but Uriah, Max, and the females all enjoyed being thrust into the forefront of what was happening around us. Max loved being recognized. It was exactly what he always wanted. Over the centuries he always enjoyed the finer things that the humans had to offer. He loved their society gatherings and the prestigious parties because they gave him a sense of something. I was never sure what he was looking for, but he never really seemed to find it. Now that he was starting to be recognized, he seemed happier than ever. Shauna and Marlene also enjoyed what our success had to offer them. They weren't playing members of the band, but most locals knew them to belong to the band. That gave them a certain distinction as being important as well. Uriah enjoyed the appreciation that he received from fans, but he was also troubled by it as well. He got annoyed when he couldn't hunt and often lashed out at fans for not leaving him alone. And to Amar, Zeke, and I, being recognized was a huge problem that needed to be solved. None of us wanted the trouble that came with someone always watching or seeing us. We were used to anonymity, and we lost that the moment our song started receiving air play. And all I really wanted was to be able to mourn and find peace through some outlet, the humans didn't let me do that. They were like vultures, they all wanted something from us. Fame, recognition, money, power; the humans who sought us out used everything they could from us.

After months of endlessly playing at different clubs and being trapped together on a bus or in hotel rooms, we began fighting amongst ourselves. Max was back to his obnoxious self-indulgent ways. He was better for years, but with our popularity he became impossible for me to deal with. His constant need to be someone important was frustrating. Fame and power became more important to him as he declared himself the leader of our band and used it to talk to everyone that wanted to know about us. I feared he would tell them something that would get us killed or expose us. I also didn't like that our images were everywhere for the humans to see. How would we ever really be able to disappear like we would eventually need to if our pictures were everywhere? I feared what this could mean for us in the future.

One evening, upon returning to Los Angeles and to our lives, many of my fears and frustrations came to a head. The longer time went on, the harder it was becoming for me to suppress my connection to humanity. It was 1991, six years after Ricci, six years after I went into the self-induced reclusive hideaway in my head, and six months after my song made its first appearance on local radio. Our popularity was exceeding my comfort zone. We were starting to be recognized when we were walking down the street. When all I wanted to do was to hide and try to reign in my sadness and anger, I couldn't. As much as I wanted to work through my worries for the future, our current situation didn't allow me that. At least for me, I knew it was time to back away from this situation. It was time to move on away from California and possibly from America completely. I only didn't know if my companions would agree with me or not.

As fate would have it, I wouldn't have to wait long to find out. Sometimes things happen that take the choice from us, and the only choice we end up with was how we react to our new reality. It seemed that no matter where we went, we were recognized. Our popularity was becoming such a problem that we had to work even harder to hide when we fed. I was really regretting ever thinking that we could make music and still live our lives as we wanted. For centuries we wandered and did nothing more, living off of the money we got from our victims and off of old money from another lifetime. I had no idea that by making the decision to be more like the humans that we would make ourselves so vulnerable.

The night after we returned to Los Angeles Max, Shauna, and Marlene went out to a party. We still agreed that hunting the dregs of society was the best thing we could do. It would have Been easy to feed from the groupies that followed us around or the fans that made it perfectly clear that they wanted to be in our presence. We could have brought any of them home with us and taken what we needed from them. But we never did and when we went to hunt we always went into Hollywood to find the homeless. But on this night Max was so amped up from our shows and from being interviewed by a local magazine that he felt like he was invincible. Uriah was going to go with them, but at the last minute decided hunting in LA was a bad idea. He tried to talk Marlene and Shauna into staying with us and going into Hollywood with us, but they were also enjoying the notoriety. They insisted that they weren't envious of our success, but Amar and I both heard their silent ranting and could feel the growing tension surrounding the house. I had come to the conclusion that our little group probably wouldn't be spending much more time together.

After Max and the girls left for whatever party they wanted to attend, the rest of us decided to go into Hollywood to hunt. None of us spoke of the growing tension at first, but Zeke had a hard time holding things back.

"I don't know what is happening with this group. But it's not good," Zeke said simply. His assessment mirroring my own.

"What are you talking about?" the ever innocent Uriah asked.

"We never hunt separately. There is a void between us and Max and the girls," Zeke explained.

Usually I remained silent and didn't speak of the things I saw or felt. But my feelings were usually right and I decided that it would be best to just speak honestly than to let this turmoil harm the entire group. Loyalty or not, everyone was going to have to make a choice, soon.

I looked out into the moonless night, trying to choose my words so I didn't cause any strife among my companions. Taking a deep breath and keeping my eyes fixed out the window I spoke. "Shauna and Marlene are jealous of our success. They feel left out and out of touch with us. They enjoy their time with Max because he soaks up the attention and praise more than any of us. Max always loved the attention that he received from high society balls and gatherings. He wanted to be one of them, but could never be because of what he is. Now he is finding his own success with this group, but again it is not his to have and he knows it. Marlene and Shauna feel very much the same. When we introduced them to society activities in Europe and when we attended those same types of functions in Texas, they both loved it. They savored it and detested the fact that we didn't make those activities frequent functions."

I move my eyes up into the expanse of the night sky, the city lights drowning out the millions of stars that dotted the blackness. I waited to see if any of them would deny my assessment, but none spoke. So taking a deep breath I continued.

"Both girls want to be part of that life also. Their human lives, so young and innocent, were stolen from them before they really got to know who they were. And although you both had the same thing happen to you, you both have done well adjusting. But Marlene and Shauna, they have not left their lives behind. They both think they are owed something and they feel like they are going to get it from Max, or society, or from success. Unfortunately, none of the success that they are experiencing actually belongs to them, much like it doesn't belong to Max or really any of us. We are all moving though this like we own it, but at least the four of us don't seem to believe that this life is ours to keep." Turning my head, I look into the matching brown eyes of the brothers sitting behind me. Their handsome faces were exotic and interesting in the eyes of the humans, their Native American ancestry was prevalent in their appearance.

"So what do you think is going to happen?" Uriah asked, worry marked his face and masked his normally confident voice. His brown eyes mirrored the worry on his brother's face. Zeke didn't show much emotion, but his eyes told me that he realized what I was trying to say.

"I don't think we will be able to keep going in this life together," I said as gently as possible. "I do not wish to sever my ties to any of you, but I feel that for some of us, our time together has come to an end. We are all going to have to make a decision about where to go from here. Who will continue together? I do not know. But I will not harbor any ill will toward those that move on without me."

The silence following my assessment of the situation boomed through the car. No one said a word or acknowledged that I was probably correct or even denied that any of it was going to happen. We all sat silently waiting. When I turned my head to look at the man to my left, driving the car, I knew my ancient friend agreed. He had felt and heard the same mutterings on the minds of our friends. His sad but determined expression spoke volumes about what he was thinking. Although he wasn't allowing me in, he let his face reflect the despondency that was in his heart and mind. And when he spoke it was to reiterate my words.

"The unhappiness has Been festering among some of our group for quite some time. It was only a matter of time before we had to deal with such unpleasantness. I agree with Tobias, whatever happens, there will be no malice felt from me toward anyone." He paused for a long time, glancing in the mirror toward the two young vampires sitting behind us. Their faces a mask of anger, sadness, and worry. They both knew that they would have to make a choice. It was clear where the lines were going to be drawn. Amar and I would move on from this place. We would reassume our lives somewhere far from California and from Max and the girls. Zeke and Uriah would have to decide where they were going to go and with whom they were going to continue to travel.

~oOo~

With huge success comes huge disappointment. Although I was sure that our downfall as a group would be because our differing opinions on success I didn't expect the implosion that would sever any friendships that had Been cultivated. I didn't want to admit that I was going to again lose those closest to me. I had lost Marguerite all those years ago, I had lost Beatrice so many times that the duress I felt from thinking about it made me physically ill, and the thought of losing this group that I had come to rely and depend was earth shattering. I loved them all and didn't want our time to end, but it seemed that yet again I had no choice in what was going to happen.

Fate had a funny way of trying to prove to me that it existed. That it along with destiny ruled my life in a way that I refused to acknowledge. No matter how much time and how many things happened, I couldn't bring myself to believe in destiny or fate, no matter how many times they thrust themselves in my way.

Upon our return from Hollywood and the melancholy of our hunt, we were all saddened by the realities that had Been discussed. But the shadow that had descended over the house and the black imprint on the surroundings was so heavy that even Uriah could sense it. Before the car was even in park, Zeke and I were out of the car and rushing the door. My head swam with all I was hearing and feeling. Panic, fear, worry, and sorrow covered the house and shrouded me. Zeke looked terrified, he couldn't move fast enough and couldn't see the horrific images that I could see, but he felt the heaviness around him.

We opened the door just as Uriah and Amar reached us. The fear on Uriah's face and the understanding on Amar's made the fear so much worse. Zeke looked to me, his face unreadable, before pushing the door open. The house was as quiet as a tomb. With all of the anguish that blanked everything, there should have Been crying, wailing, or desperate pleas for all that was wrong to be righted. But there wasn't, the stillness in the house was unnerving.

We moved as a unit through the house, following the anguished feelings that muted everything else around us. The ticking of the clock and the normal sounds that all houses made were hushed by the low growl emanating from the back of the house. Undiscernible to any normal person, we all heard the desperation in the sound.

Bursting through the back of the house, I had to hold Uriah back from what was before us. A human man, lying dead in our kitchen, Max holding a weeping Shauna, and Marlene lying on the floor… dead. When Uriah let out a howl that shattered the silence, Max and Shauna flinched. Pulling away from me, Uriah threw himself at Marlene's motionless body lying on the floor. Marlene's once perfect porcelain skin was stained with blood and scarred with marks, her light brown hair also caked with blood. Her skirt was torn and her shirt askew. It looked like she may have Been assaulted before she was killed. Uriah picked up her lifeless body and held her close to him. His mind racing, trying to understand what had happened and why she was gone.

Shauna turned to Zeke, Amar, and I and glared a steely stare. She pointed to me and began to shake. "This," she said, pointing to both the dead man and Marlene, "is your fault. You brought us here for your own selfish reasons. You made us stay here. You made the song. You made all of this happen." She moved her hands around gesturing all around her. Then she turned to Zeke and Amar, "And you two. You allowed him to do this to us. Zeke, you were supposed to protect us. You are the strongest of the four of us. You promised. But where were you tonight? Off with them, following their stupid little rules about where to hunt and how to hunt. You weren't here to protect us." And finally she looked to the emotional face of Uriah, "And you. You were supposed to love her. Where were you? Off following the great Tobias and Amar. Where were you when we entered that party? Where were you?"

I was astonished at her claims. She was taking no responsibility for anything that had happened to Marlene. It was easier to blame me. I was so saddened by the loss and the claim that my selfishness could cause such a tragedy that I was struck speechless. But then Amar stepped forward, ignoring Shauna and looking to Max. His face told the story that Shauna didn't want to acknowledge. Max bowed his head in sadness. "Max, what happened here?"

"We decided to attend a party being thrown by one of the other bands in the area at a warehouse on the outskirts of town. I thought it would be like the society parties that we attended years ago. You know, easy targets for our taking. I thought we could take what we wanted and return here after. I never expected…"

"Don't you dare take the blame for this," Shauna hissed at Max. "This is Tobias's fault. All of his rules about where and when we can feed did this, not you."

Max just looked down and I could finally get a handle on his thoughts. He was trying to behave as he always had, not understanding that with time people have changed. Women weren't the weaklings that they once were and hunting in such places was a recipe for disaster.

"Max, please continue," Amar prompted.

He heaved a sigh and Shauna wrapped herself around him tighter. I hadn't realized how close the two had become and hadn't noticed the canyon that had formed between Shauna and Zeke, but I could feel it now. A lot had changed over the years, and a lot more had changed since Max graced our group again.

"Shauna and I decided to share one. We took him out back, leaving Marlene inside. She was having a good time and didn't seem ready to leave. So we left her and took the young man that we had decided on out back. He was young and star struck. He was in a new band and wanted to meet me, so Shauna told him she was taking him to me. By the time we went back in to the party, Marlene was nowhere to be found. We asked around for her, but no one seemed to see anything."

Looking between Max and Shauna the picture became clear. They left Marlene so that they could be alone together and hunt. A type of foreplay that the two had been engaging in for months now. They had Been hiding their closeness from the rest of us. When they couldn't find Marlene they just assumed that she returned home. But ultimately it was Max's favorite silver tipped cane that killed Marlene.

"The best we can tell, either the guy she brought home with her was already high or he convinced her to try something because when we got home, he was dead and she was crazed. Her clothes were a mess, like maybe the man tried something on her and she defended herself. But as you can see, she didn't bit him, so we think he convinced her to try something with him or maybe he slipped something to her to try to take advantage of her."

Suddenly Uriah was up and standing in front of Max and Shauna. His fury rolling off of him, covering the room and forcing the two to recoil from him. "What happened to her then?" he growled a deep and terrifying sound.

"Sh… she was cr…crazed," Shauna cried.

"She attacked like she didn't know us," Max said. "She was hallucinating. She thought she saw monsters, she was laughing hysterically one moment then terrified the next, she was delusional and we couldn't calm her down. She attacked Shauna at full force. I just tried to subdue her, I swear. I didn't mean…"

Uriah attacked before any of us could stop him. His anger fueling the rage he felt. "You killed her. Both of you, you killed her," he raged at them. He got one hit in on Max before Zeke and Amar got a hold of him. He wailed and fought against the two stronger vampires, his wrath propelling him forward. The two stronger vampires pulled him from the room and when they did, I stepped toward Shauna and Max barely able to control my fury. Max had always Been a problem. His constant need to be among the humans and to go against what we all decided was the best thing to do. Shauna used to follow Zeke but when Max came back, she became just as much a problem as he. She started blaming everyone around for perceived problems and she attacked me constantly for my dealings with Beatrice's different incarnations.

"How dare you two blame me for what happened here. My desire was never to be a part of humanity like it was with you. You were the ones that constantly wanted to go to parties and be among the humans. You were the ones that insisted on hunting in populated places instead of airing on the side of caution. I did not make these decisions on my own, we discussed what was best for us so we could continue on and hunt without issue. You two made your decisions and it killed Marlene. You both need to leave this place. Leave us, and never return. Because if Zeke and Amar let Uriah go, I will not be held accountable for what he does to you. And we all know that he is stronger than both of you."

Without another word, I turned and found Amar, Zeke, and Uriah standing in the foyer. Uriah no longer being subdued, but his anger continued to roll off of him clouding the room but he was maintaining control of himself. I was impressed with his strength, I didn't know if I could be so calm. They all stood and looked to me. Amar smiled gently, "My friend, it believe it is time for us to go." He turned to the two young vampires, "My young friends, I hope you will come with us. It is time we leave this place and all that it reminds us of the past behind."

"Where will we go? And what about Marlene's body?" Uriah asked.

"We will take care of Marlene," I assured him.

By the time we packed all that belonged to us, Max and Shauna were gone. I could feel the sorrow between the brothers. They had spent a century with the females and they lost them both in one night. One to death and the other to disloyalty and carelessness. We moved Marlene to the back of the property and proceeded to bury her. The brothers insisted on the most respectful burial that we could manage. So Marlene was laid to rest in the middle of a cluster of trees and bushes. Uriah insisted it was where she would have wanted to be. After we finished with Marlene, we took care of the man. We placed him in the car that we found parked in the garage and sent the car careening over an embankment a few miles from the house.

With all of that behind us, we piled into the car that we had acquired and left Los Angeles and probably California for good.


	19. No Such Thing as Vampires

Chapter 19

No Such thing as Vampires

With so much loss and tragedy following us, it seemed that I was no longer the only one that felt the weight of the world on their shoulders. I did my best to bury my constant connection to the humans, but it was difficult. My link to them, being able to experience their imprints, and sense what they were feeling was as strong as ever. I didn't think it was a power that would ever leave me. Although that connection gave me more strength than I even realized, I still looked at it like a curse more than a gift. Being attached to the collective, experiencing their lives, and how what happened to them and around them effected them was torturous. Being vampires and feeling all of these things all of the time was exhausting. It made me crazy sometimes. Thinking back to how the feelings have affected me over the centuries, it surprised me that I never went mad. But I guess over the centuries, I have had moments of lunacy. Humanity in itself was messy and exasperating, and to anyone who had any real connection to it, it was a burden just to be. My connection to humanity had an effect on Amar also, he had a connection to me, and so he also felt some of what I felt from the humans.

After we left California, we traveled east and just kept going. I think all of us just wanted to get as far away from what had transpired there as we could. A part of me wanted to get on a boat or plane and leave America completely. Nothing was there for me, not anymore. I didn't want to find Beatrice again only to lose her, and I truly believed that if I found her again I would lose her. The connection, the draw to one another that I once believed would be my salvation and could make me whole once more had done nothing but rip me apart and guide me to my personal hell. I was starting to believe that it was that connection that killed her more than just the events of the time. If I hadn't Been attracted to Beatrice, the horde wouldn't have gone after her. If Bea wasn't working that day just so she could see me, if I hadn't made Betty leave the German compound, if I didn't make Trice leave me to say her goodbyes to humanity, and if Ricci hadn't felt such distress because of my constant mind games then none of them would have died. None of them would have met the demise that found them. They were all wholly innocent and I led them straight to hell. I practically placed them into the hand of the Angel of Death himself and watched them self-destruct. But I couldn't change it now, all I could do was to move through this life and do everything in my power to ignore and avoid any pull that I felt toward a person or place.

As the days went on and the further we got from California, the easier it was to breathe. We were able to leave it all behind, the music, the fans, everything. And it only got easier because the music scene had shifted quickly after we left Los Angeles. The overtly happy and fun-loving 80's made way for a much moodier 90's. It actually made it much easier for our musical group to fall off the radar and disappear. The upbeat glam rock and power ballad era had met its end with the rise of alternative music. Suddenly the bands that were so over the top in their crazy clothes and big hair had all but disappeared. In their place was a more morose sound and a look that could only be described as careless, the humans called it grunge. It was a good turn of events for us.

With it all behind us, and because of the crushing feeling of betrayal that Max and Shauna left in their wake, we traveled. We tore through cities aimlessly, taking whatever mortals crossed our path, and searching as we went but for what I wasn't sure. We had no destination, no purpose, and no real longing to be a part of anything that was happening around us. We didn't seek any kind of companionship from anyone, our only solace was in each kill.

We continued on this path for years, on the outside of humanity, staying hidden from them, and observing them. Our kills were still efficient but we feasted frequently. We had no real regard for their lives anymore because as far as we could see, their regard for one another was non-existent. We were no longer the most dangerous creatures on the prowl, humanity had far exceeded our capacity for viciousness. They murdered, raped, and stole from their neighbors and their community. They had no respect for anyone around them.

"What has happened to them?" Uriah asked on evening after hunting. We had arrived in Philadelphia only days before and had already witnessed several fights in the streets, muggings, a drive-by shooting, and more drug deals and prostitutes than we could keep track. Even after all the years, it still was astonishing to see the lack of caring that humans gave each other. They still didn't seem to care about taking a life if they felt like it was deserved. The worst part was, most times the reason for the killing was so diminutive that death should have never Been the outcome.

"Humanity is an evil vindictive creature," Amar explained. "The young have little understanding about the importance of life. To them the span of a year is a long time, and the idea of fifty years is unthinkable. They are not learning from the mistakes of those that are older."

"In our day," Zeke started, "we saw violence, but we didn't go around randomly killing each other."

"Of course not," I said sadly, "in that time and in mine as well, those who were oppressed rarely fought back. Over the past thirty years though, many who were once oppressed started fighting back. We remember the girl in Virginia who was being raped and was to be killed just because of her appearance. We remember what they were going to do to Uriah just because of a darker complexion. Those who were once the victims are no longer willing to be victims. They are fighting back."

"But they seem like they are fighting each other just as much as they are fighting against everyone else. Shouldn't they stand together like they did thirty years ago?" Uriah asked.

This was a questions for which I had no answer. I wasn't sure I would ever really understand humanity. I didn't think I even understood it when I was a human myself. After all my father murdered my mother, he abused me, he battered his slaves, and he molested the young house servant that was raised under his roof, I didn't think I would ever comprehend why mortals acted the way that they did. My father had no regard for the lives that he was supposed to oversee, and I believed that had Been the problem that had plagued mankind throughout time. None of them seemed to have regard for life or the lives of their neighbors.

Now some may have seen that kind of comment coming from a vampire as being hypocritical, but the fact was we rarely killed for any reason other than to feed. Even when I was on my vigilante vendetta, I only killed murders, rapists, and other criminals that I believed were harming humanity with their crimes.

"They should stand together," Amar responded after a moment of thought. "But I don't know if we will ever really see humanity stand as one and work together. They are always so focused on their differences that I don't believe they will ever be able to grow beyond their differences."

Shaking their heads, the brothers both sighed. "Maybe it is time to move on from this place before we are somehow caught up with their problems," Zeke said.

"You, my young friend, are right," Amar said.

"I agree, I think it is time we leave America for a while. We could go back to Italy and spend some time in Amar's home," I suggested.

With a smile, Amar agreed and so we secured passage to Italy. This time, instead of a week long voyage, we would take a flight that would only take hours.

~oOo~

We spent the rest of the 1990s in Calabria in the home that Amar maintained. He was able to keep the home in his 'family' so when he returned, the humans that sustained the property thought he was a relative of the original owner. In the small town in Southern Italy, we were able to hide once again from the problems that plagued society. Italy was in a time of social and economic unrest, but our little piece of the country was virtually untouched by the politics of the time. We were able to hunt and provide ourselves with ample ways to occupy our time.

Zeke and Uriah both began to travel for days and weeks without us. They said they were only hunting, but they were both exhibiting the kind of anger that I once had. They would go and kill, but they started to make a game out of it with the mortals. They started playing with their kills, Zeke would use his powers of persuasion to convince the mortals that they wanted to do things for them. The two of them would bring a husband and wife together to a hotel or convince them to take the brothers back to their home. There they would force the husband to watch he and Uriah take advantage of his wife then force the wife watch them kill her husband. After they just left the bodies to be found. They didn't care, humanity was evil and of course to mortals, vampires didn't exist.

Amar and I did little to deter the brother from their games. We all knew we couldn't control one another and the fact was, when I spent my time in a similar manner they didn't try to control me. I understood the need to take control of the humans. After all, most didn't attempt to control themselves so it was easy for us to take them for our own purposes.

Amar and I weren't completely innocent as time passed either, we were just a little more discrete. We didn't travel the country for weeks at a time to make our kills. We simply used our magnetic charm and our handsome looks to lure men and women back to our home. I always saw what we looked like to them. They saw our beauty, our mystery, and our dark brooding disposition and that attracted them to us. Amar was dark and foreboding, but strikingly beautiful in every way. His eyes shown his age even though the rest of him appeared no older than twenty-five. My skin was paler than Amar's but my dark hair and ocean blue eyes attracted men and women alike. They saw me as more rugged and handsome to Amar's beauty.

We took our time with our kills. Wining and dining them before we took what we needed from their veins. Our kills were efficient, but no less rewarding. I had forgotten how much I had loved this kind of hunt. All of the years of hiding ourselves, trying to fit in with the humans, trying to hide our kills had worn on us all. After all, just like Uriah and Zeke said, to mortals, vampires weren't real. So maybe hiding was pointless. Maybe we were ready to really rejoin the world once again.


	20. The Origin

Chapter 20

The Origin

Italy was a beautiful country, exotic and lovely in every way. We spent years roaming the countryside, enjoying all that Calabria had to offer. I loved living in Italy, our little corner of the region was secluded and gave us a sanctuary away from mortals and any other creatures that might interfere with our solitude. Calabria was more beautiful than any other country that I had ever set foot. In the southern tip of the country, in what was referred to as the toe of the Italian peninsula, this beautiful region sat. The city we occupied, Tropea, faced the sea and was famous during Roman times. Legend said that Hercules made the area a port after standing on the Coast of Gods following a quest to Spain. The area had populated areas, but there were also places in the hills that were much more rural, that was where we lived.

I was happy in Tropea, it was peaceful and lovely. I loved how ancient the land was, how the connection to such an archaic race still touched all that lived there. I felt especially connected to the land and the ancient people. I wasn't sure why I felt so calm in that place or why a connection to a long gone group of humans would help me to make sense of my life and everything with Beatrice. I knew that the way I kept trying to force her to be mine was wrong. I felt it deep within myself. But I didn't realize how wrong it felt until I reconnected with this place. I expressed my feelings to Amar one day. I tried to explain my connection to his home and to the ancient people who once walked the lands that we now walked. He seemed to take in my admission, but didn't ask me to expand on it, nor did he comment. He simply seemed to take it in and listen.

Then one day while sitting on the terrace of Amar's home, he told me a story. The story would forever change the way I looked at our life and at my ancient companion. It was the story of the first vampire and how he came to be. The first vampire's name was Amar also, he lived around 300 B.C. in Florence, Italy. Amar was an adventurer who traveled to Greece to seek the Oracle of Delphi. While in Greece, he met the beautiful Selene who was the Oracle's sister. She tended the temple of Apollo, where the Oracle resided. After meeting several times at dawn, the two fell in love. Amar asked the woman to marry him and return to Italy with him, she agreed and they set to meet the next morning at dawn to leave. Apollo had also fallen in love with Selene, and was furious with Amar for trying to take the woman away, so he punished him. He cursed Amar so he couldn't go into the sun without his skin burning.

When Amar realized he wouldn't be able to meet Selene at dawn because of the curse, he went to Hades for help. Hades agreed to help the lovers, if Amar stole Artemis' silver bow. Amar gained favor with Artemis by hunting and killing swans. He would use a feather and the blood to write Selene poetry and give the body to Artemis as a sacrifice. When he ran out of arrows, he asked Artemis to borrow hers so that he could hunt a swan. Instead of hunting, he took the silver bow to Hades. When Artemis realized what happened, she cursed Amar. This curse caused silver to burn his skin. But taking pity on him when she found out about his dealings with Hades and Apollo, she made him a great hunter. He was given fangs so that he could drain the blood of his prey to write his poetry and he was given immortality. The catch was he also retained all of the curses as well. She also granted him a life with Selene, but they had to promise to only worship Artemis and they could never touch or consummate their marriage because Artemis was a virgin goddess.

When he and Selene left Greece, Amar was no longer able to be in the sun, he could not handle silver, and his soul belonged to Hades. After a number of years, Amar's immortality allowed him to stay young, but Selene continued to age. Amar was distraught at losing his beloved Selene, he knew that he would not ever join her in the afterlife because his soul still belonged to Hades. That night, he went into the woods and found a white swan swimming alone in a small lake. He killed the swan and offered it to Artemis. He begged the goddess to help him by making Selene immortal so they could stay together forever. Artemis appeared to him and she made him one last deal as repayment for his years of loyalty. Artemis told Amar that he could touch Selene just once, he could drink her blood. Doing so would kill her mortal body, but from then on, her blood mixed with his could create eternal life for any who drink. If he did this, Artemis would allow them to stay together forever.

Amar wanted to refuse, he didn't want to damn others to his fate. But after telling Selene of Artemis' deal, she begged him to do it. She wasn't ready to die and she didn't want to leave him. After her convincing, he bit her neck and drank her blood into his body. When he set her limp body down, Selene began to radiate light, and she ascended up to the sky. Amar watched Selene's glowing spirit lifted up to greet Artemis at the moon. When she reached the goddess, the moon lit up with a brilliant light. Selene became the goddess of moonlight, and every night she would reach down with her rays of light to the earth and finally touch her beloved Amar as well as all of their children, the newly created vampires who carried the blood of Amar and Selene, together.

Once he finished with his story, we remained quiet for some time. I contemplated all that Amar told me about the becoming of the first vampire, love and loss created the creature that would eventually father us all. His sacrifice gave us our powers, but his love was what damned us all. "Do you believe that story?" I finally asked.

"Yes, I do," Amar said with sadness in his eyes. Then I realized something.

"Amar, how did you get your name?" I asked.

"It was a name that was given to me a long time ago by the one that created me. If you believe that I am that Amar, you are wrong. I only received that name after my becoming. My creator believed that I looked like Amar, so he started calling me by that name. Over time, it stayed with me."

I looked at the ancient creature, really trying to see the man that he might have Been. Was he really the origin of the vampire or was he really only given the name after his creator made him. The problem was, he once told me that he was the oldest living vampire. Could he be the origin? Could he be that Amar?

"What happened to Amar?"

He seemed to sigh and look up into the sun, "Legend says he lives on top of the tallest mountain in Italy. It is believed that he still hunts and uses the blood of his prey to feed from and he has continued to use the blood of swans to write poetry for his beloved Selene."

For the first time, I could see the exhaustion and how time has worn on the ancient creature. Whether he was the original Amar or not seemed to be a moot point. I didn't think he would ever admit to such a thing and even if he did, what would it change?

"I told you this story for a very specific reason. You see, the love between Selene and Amar was doomed from the start. Even though Artemis allowed them to be together, he was never able to touch her in any form, for comfort or any other reason. Their physical distance made it difficult for them. Their love kept them together and loyal to one another and to Artemis, but it wasn't until he was ready to lose her, to give her up, that he was really able to have her and hold her forever. And it is her light that now shines on us all, giving us power and strength in their combined blood and their love."

I thought about what he had told me and suddenly the context for which I believed he was referring came to light. "Are you telling me that my love for Beatrice is doomed?"

"It might be my friend. Vampires rarely really love. We are driven by need and desire, but we can't mistake that desire for anything more than that. But in your case, I believe that you really do love the human woman and I do believe that she continues to come back because she is connected to you."

"Does that mean the gods are still influencing our lives?" I asked.

"I know nothing of the gods," he said almost harshly. "But I do know that if a soul continues to return, there is a reason. Is that the doing of the ancient secular gods or of a more divine God? I do not know. I only know that the soul of that woman continues to return and somehow she finds you."

"But how do I change it?" I asked, frustrated. But then it suddenly dawned on me. "I have to let her live. I have to love her without trying to make her mine."

He nodded sadly, "I believe that might be the answer. You have tried to make her your bride for a century and it never works out. It seems that as soon as you touch her to make her yours, she is doomed to death. Is that the promise that Amar made to Artemis still hanging on to our kind because of our creator or is it fate? I don't think we will ever know. But I believe this is the answer. If you want her to live you cannot try to take her in any selfish way. You must allow the attraction and affection to grow naturally."

"But I never touched Beatrice the first time."

"No, but your strong attraction to her drew the attention of vindictive vampires who were jealous of your strength and your connection to me. So you didn't physically touch her, but you touched her with your desire and need. The moment you started spending too much time hunting and watching her, you doomed her. You had no intention to make her your bride, but you had an almost desperate need to feed from her. I believe that to save the next incarnation of the girl, your intentions will have to pure."

Hearing this and remembering all of the years with and without Beatrice, I could see the pattern. I hadn't realized how damned we truly were. My love for Beatrice was her demise. It made sense. But what could I do to prevent it again? "Should I ignore the pull? Would that save her?" I ask.

"I don't think that would work. I think no matter where you both are, when she is of a certain age, you will be drawn to one another. You will just have to remember to keep your interactions as pure as possible. I don't know if there is anything more that you could do."

"What if I turned her the moment that I find her again?"

"I do not know, Tobias. You could try. We can never really be sure about what will happen when we turn a human. You have mentioned that there were reasons that you didn't want to turn Ricci or Trice. You mentioned that both women were damaged. If you turn a damaged soul, I don't know what the consequences might be. But if you live in the presence of that soul without physically touching her, you might just allow that damaged soul to heal."

It all made sense, but would I be able to ignore the physical attraction that I felt when Beatrice was near? I could only hope. The one thing that I did know however was that we weren't destined to meet in Italy. I felt the unwavering desire to return to America once again. The need to return to the place it all started was strong. After over two hundred years, it was time to go home.

After the realization that I would need to return to America and confront my love for Beatrice, the four of us that had traveled together for so long gathered for what could have been the final time. Amar and I explained the basics of what we both now believed might be the connection between Beatrice and myself to Zeke and Uriah. I explained the pull I was feeling to return to New Orleans. The brothers took in all that we had to say, but I could hear what they were thinking, I could feel what they felt. They loved this place and all that it had to offer. They had finally found a place that they felt they could be happy. I couldn't begrudge them that. I had also fallen in love with Calabria and with Tropea, but the call to return to my home was too much to resist. I knew that the pull wouldn't subside if I didn't heed it.

"You do not have to say a word, my friends," I told the two. "I can feel how much you love this place. I know that this is where you feel that you belong. I do not expect any of you to follow me, but this is something that I have to do. I hope that if I can be strong enough I will break her from her cursed reincarnation. Maybe if she lives out this life, she will be released."

"We can come with you," Zeke offered. "We have been one for so long…"

"No," I said abruptly, cutting him off. "I cannot allow you to follow me this time. You must stay here, or go where you want to go. We will meet again one day. Our lives are eternal, we will find one another once more."

Uriah turned to Amar, after all this was his home, he loved it there. "What will you do Amar? Will you remain here, with us?"

Amar smiled, "I will travel to America with Tobias. I want to help him see this through. But you are welcome to remain in this house. Make it yours until we return to you one day. Care for the place I love so dearly."

The brothers both smiled. It had been a long time after Marlene's death and Shauna's betrayal before they finally started to find themselves again. Their love for this place and their loyalty and trust in Amar and I put them at ease. They found their solace in this place, now I could only hope that once I released Beatrice from this cursed life, that I would also find mine.

~oOo~

It was but a month later that Amar and I were boarding a plane from Italy in the early morning hours of April 2005. We would fly into New York City and then from their transfer to New Orleans. Even though I had loved Italy, I was happy to be home. All of the bad that surrounded my time in America was overshadowed by a calmness that had settled within me.

Stepping foot back onto the streets of New Orleans, I felt the desire to go to my father's land. It had been over two hundred years since I stepped foot in that place. Over two hundred years since I burned the house, barns, and servants' quarters to the ground. I did everything I could at the time to make sure the cursed place would be useless to any who wanted the land. Although I was sure that after so much time the land had probably been take over, at least in my time, the land had a monstrous quality to it. After all the devil had once lived there.

As we neared the area that had once been my father's land, I heard the echoes of a long since forgotten time. The imprints of all that had happened in this place rushed my senses and made me ill. The beatings, my mother's murder, the abuse endured by the slaves, my father taking Marguerite's innocence from her and forcing her to endure his sexual escapades on a regular basis. So many memories of a time lost to the years. I felt all of the history that covered this place. Most of the memories that blanketed this place were filled with viciousness that seemed to place a wicked spell over the entire area. It was a cold and empty feeling that plagued the land and its occupants.

The land that was once my fathers was no longer a plantation. It seemed after the Civil War, the government broke the land up to provide land to the former slaves that had toiled on those lands. But over the years it was developed and now, it was covered in homes and small gardens. This land didn't seem to hold the torment that it once held, it was given new life when it was divided among the people that deserved it. It pleased me that my father's legacy was overshadowed by the good fortune of those he was so insistent to hold down. His essence was but a small blip on the land that had once been overpowered by his cruelty.

After spending a short time in Destrehan, we returned to New Orleans. Little had changed in the city. Bars and other such establishments still dotted Bourbon Street and the surrounding area. Hotels and restaurants were also prominent in the area now. Most of the two hundred year old buildings that dotted the area when I lived were still there. Many of the larger, more decorative buildings were built after I left, but the French Quarter had remained quite untouched. After all of our travel, and all of the change that I had seen, the consistency of this place was comforting. I had loved New Orleans in life, and I still loved it to this day.

Amar and I decided to rent a room in one of the more prominent hotels in the French Quarter. We both enjoyed all that the area had to offer. We could hunt and feed as necessary, the influx of visitors to the area seemed to be quite extensive. We could easily hunt those who didn't belong to this place and it only took one night to realize the night life there would also make it an easy place to pursue our next meal.

We now lived by Zeke's and Uriah's old adage, to humans we don't exist, so why hide what we did. We only had to keep it from our home and the places that we frequented. The good thing though, New Orleans offered a lot of places to hide while we performed our nefarious deeds. It was the perfect place for us.

It only took three weeks before I felt the familiar pull that signaled Beatrice's return. We had been wandering through the French Quarter, trying to decide on that night's endeavor when I felt the pull. We were passing a series of specialty shops in the square when I felt the pull toward one of the businesses. Upon glancing in the door I could see that this small shop seemed to be a tailor's shop. The window held a variety of unique clothing that seemed to be one of a kind, but it was the female figure leaning over a sewing machine in the middle of the shop that caught my attention. From my vantage point I could see her dark brown hair, but nothing more of her was visible. I would have to go in to see if this was once again my Beatrice. But this time I had to do things differently, I had to make sure that I released her from her curse and then hopefully I could release me from mine.


	21. Calm before the Storm

Chapter 21

Calm before the Storm

I didn't desire to make the same mistakes as I had in the past. I couldn't hunt this woman, nor could I approach her and feed her all of the imprints of our pasts together. I had to find another way to encounter this woman, then it occurred to me, Amar's story. The original Amar had noticed when Selene was arriving at Apollo's temple to care for her sister, the Oracle of Delphi, and that was when he approached her. He spoke to her daily at the same time until they forged a bond simply by speaking to one another. Their bond was real and beyond the realm of the gods. This was how I felt I needed to approach this situation. The story of the original was both enlightening and troubling, but it was exactly what I needed to bring my story to an end.

For days I watched when she arrived and departed from her little shop. She left at varying times in the evenings, but she arrived just before dawn daily, just like Selene. So I staged an introduction with the beauty that I believed to be Beatrice. I couldn't wait to look upon her violet eyes once more and feel the familiarity of her presence and her soul calling to me.

Just before dawn one morning, I walked through the French Quarter feeling more connected to myself than I had for a long time. It was wonderful to be in a place that I felt such a link to. The cool spring morning just before sunrise was quiet and calm, it was a perfect place to simply enjoy everything the town had to offer.

I rounded the corner and came face to face with the most beautiful woman that I had ever seen. She was stunning in every way. Her sparkling violet eyes were bright and full of life, her oval face was expressive with high cheek bones and a perfect Cupid's bow mouth. She was an average height for a woman with a shapely body that was perfect for her. She didn't cower from me when she saw me, her face simply lit up and she smiled warmly at me, warming my cold heart.

"Good morning," she said, her kindly southern accent drawing out her words.

"Good morning," I countered. "It is a beautiful morning, isn't it?"

"Indeed," she responded smoothing her handmade skirt. It was clear that her clothes were made specifically to fit her body perfectly. Tailored just for her perfect figure. I started to see into her thoughts, but then stopped myself. I wanted to do this the right way, without the intrusion, without the contact. Only talking and nothing more. I would finally see if the attraction to this creature was real or not and I would find out if it was the original Amar's curse that made her continue to be reincarnated.

"I am Tobias," I bowed introducing myself. "It is a pleasure to meet you…" I dragged out the last word to indicate that I wanted to know her name but didn't. I hoped she would see this as an opening to introduce herself as well.

"Hello Tobias, my name isTris. It is a pleasure to meet you also."

Lisa, her beautiful melodic voice sang out the name into the quiet morning. Her accompanying smile made me feel warm all over again. The connection with her had never been that strong so quickly, but for the first time I also wasn't trying to manipulate anything by using my powers. I simply allowed our connection to happen in a natural and normal way.

"Where are you going at such an hour?" I asked. "Most people are still sleeping, or just arriving to their beds for rest."

"I work in a shop just down the street," she explained. Her violet eyes on me, connected with my eyes as if she was seeing into my soul and joining with me. I could feel every inch of her presence and we hadn't gotten within two feet of one another. The link with this woman was unlike any I had ever felt and it had only been minutes since we started speaking. "What about you, Tobias?" she asked saying my name like it belonged to her. Love and caring in her voice. This creature was unlike Trice or Ricci. Both of them were irreparably damaged by their lives, but Tris was different. She seemed whole and perfect. I knew there was always a possibility for her to also have problems like her previous lives, but I didn't think she would be. And not using my powers to find out was both frustrating and exciting. I wanted to know, but the unknown was thrilling.

"Just out enjoying the morning before retiring for the day. I," I paused not knowing what to say. I decided to make things as normal as I could, "I work nights. So this is my bedtime."

She nodded and smiled, her perfect teeth glittering in the morning light. "May I walk with you Tris, before I return to my hotel?"

"Hotel? But I thought you said you were working," she said.

"I am, but I am back home after being gone for a long time so I have yet to secure a permanent residence."

Her smile widened, "You are originally from New Orleans?"

"Destrehan actually. But I haven't been back here for a very long time. Nothing much has changed though."

"Nothing here ever really does. It seems that the French Quarter is a constant that may never really change." She stopped talking and looked around. Finally she answered, "I would love for you to walk with me Tobias."

Together we walked down the street, and when she indicated to her shop I made sure to look at it with interest. I took in the clothes in the window that seemed to change daily and the uniqueness of her own outfit. She seemed quite talented. "Do you make all of these clothes?"

"I do," she said lighting up again. "It's a labor of love. I enjoy creating, I hope to one day be a real fashion designer. But for now, I love my little shop and all it has to offer. It allows me to be around and meet all kinds of people and I have quite a catalogue following also."

"That is very impressive," I said reverently. Noticing the sunrise and not wishing to be weakened by it in my current euphoric state, I turn to her and bowed once again. "Well Tris, I must leave you now. It was a pleasure meeting you and talking to you. Perhaps we will meet again sometime."

"I would like that. Nice to meet you also, Tobias," she paused and curtsied. "Until we meet again."

With that I turned and left her little shop. I hurried to the hotel that I shared with Amar, happier than I had ever been. When I arrived at the room, my old friend greeted me kindly.

"Well, how was your meeting?"

"It was better than ever before. I didn't use my powers in any way. I simply allowed our conversation to flow naturally and we still managed to connect instantly. She is delightful," I sighed.

"No contact at all?" he asked, interested.

"No, it was a simple meeting and introduction, nothing more. She is a charming creature. She is creative, she makes all of those clothes herself. She is warm and inviting. But I must say, I don't know if never touching her could really be an option. She is far too fascinating for me to stay away from her. I think eventually our skin could make contact."

"I have been giving that thought also," he started. "Perhaps it's not so much the touch that is the problem but the fact that in the past your intentions were never pure. I'm wondering if it is the purity of your interactions that will make the difference this time. Amar was cursed by the gods, and his children bear his curses, but he couldn't touch Selena because of their allegiance to Artemis, you have sworn no such loyalty."

I consider his thoughts and nod, "That is possible. But for now, I am going to follow the no touching rule and the no using my powers rule. It was refreshing to talk to her without trying to manipulate her. She was interested in talking to me because she wanted to, not because I was forcing her."

"Wise decision young friend. So what will you do next?"

"Much like the original Amar, I will simply meet her in the mornings as she walks to work. I will walk with her and talk, nothing more. She believes I work a night shift, so it will be a good excuse to be on the street at the same time every morning. I will see where our paths take us from there."

Amar fixed his warm brown eyes on mine, the depths of his ancient eyes speaking to me in ways that I didn't understand. But they warmed me none the less. Then he spoke, "You have come a long way, young one. It takes a wise being to be able to adapt and change the way you have over the centuries, especially with your abilities and connections to humanity. I am impressed with you. Eternal life is difficult, many do not handle it well. And others handle it but are never able to really find a balance. It seems you are well on your way to becoming strong in every way."

Without another word, Amar retired to his room in the suite that we were renting. Perhaps it was time to find a more permanent residence in the area, I would have to speak to him about it after we awaken.

~oOo~

The following weeks were spent hunting both for our next meal and for a permanent residence. And every morning, just before sunrise, I met Tris. We walked together and talked about everything but nothing at all. I looked forward to our daily encounters and she seemed to also enjoy our time together. She never made me feel unwelcome. Her smile upon seeing me every morning lit up her face and made her look truly happy. That in turn made me happy as well. The link that I felt to the violet eyed creature was far deeper than I had ever felt before. Connecting on a real level instead of through supernatural ones was far more fulfilling and meant so much more to me. I felt like I could really live my life with this woman forever and not ever have to touch her, just like Selene and Amar, because our connection was so pure and real. I didn't need the physical connection because our mental and emotional connection was truer than any other that I ever had.

Our encounters continued through the warm summer months, and our bond became stronger with each encounter. I even started visiting her in the evenings just after sunset. We would talk of her day and I would tell her of my time in Italy for the past ten years. I described the beauty that was Calabria, I told her of Zeke, Uriah, and Amar. I told her that Uriah and Zeke stayed in Italy while Amar and I traveled back to America for a while.

She told me of her family and her time growing up in New Orleans. She had an older brother and a younger sister, both of whom she loved dearly. Her parents had died in a car accident several years before, but before that she had a perfect life with her family. And since her parents' deaths, she and her siblings were extremely close. They were both married and often teased her for remaining single in spite of her beauty. But they meant well by all of their teasing and humor. For the first time her life was a good one. Trice and Ricci had terrible lives with their parents. Beatrice was raised in a convent, she knew love, just not the traditional love of her mother. Bea had known her father was involved in mob activities, but she had a good life with her mother and siblings. And I never got to know Betty's family background. But by far Tris had the best life of them all. She was loved and she loved in return, she knew what true love was because she saw it in her parents and in her siblings who were also committed. This was by far the best version of the woman that I had encountered.

We continued to get together daily and talk, nothing more. She seemed happy with this arrangement, but I longed for her. The comfort of her voice and words wrapped around me like a warm blanket. I often wondered if her touch would feel the same. But I would never initiate the contact. I had considered Amar's suggestion that the no contact factor was not a curse but a choice for the Selena and her Amar. Their children had made no such choice, so more than likely contact with the beautiful woman wouldn't cause a problem, but I wasn't willing to test it. Our connection was far too valuable to me to lose because I couldn't control my urges.

As late summer approached, so did the threat of storms. The southern United States was known for tropical storms and hurricanes during the late summer months. This year would be no different. As August progressed, my connection to Tris intensified, but so did the weather. They were tracking frequent tropical storms across the Atlantic but had little worry about our little speck of the country. That was until one of the tropical storms reached hurricane status just before it made landfall in Florida. And when that storm entered the warm waters of the Gulf of Mexico, it seemed that we were going to be in for quite a ride.

Days before the storm's arrival I had decided that I wanted to ensure Tris's safety. I was terrified that I would lose her again, but I also worried for her livelihood. So when a state of emergency was declared for the area, Amar and I took it upon ourselves to board up her store and make sure all of her things were safely off of the floor and out of harm's way. When she arrived at her store the next morning she was moved to tears. She thanked us profusely.

Wanting to ensure her safety further, I asked her about her home, "Can we come to your home and help you prepare there also?"

"My brother and brother-in-law have already done that. They were going to come here after they finished helping some of their neighbors. It was very kind of you both to take such care of my store."

"It was our pleasure," I said smiling into her sparkling violet eyes. They danced with tears as the light of the street lamps shown off of the wetness in them. The violet eyes of her past lives had always been appealing, but Tris's eyes were always so expressive and warm. They held intelligence and knowledge in their depths.

"Lisa, will you be safe alone in your home?" Amar asked her.

"I believe so. But my brother wants me to go stay with him and his family for the next few days. I will probably do that just in case." Then she paused for a moment then tilted her head at Amar, "I don't think we have ever officially met, I'm Tris." Her smile lighting up the room as usual.

Amar smiled back to her, "I'm Amar, a friend of Tobias's."

"I've heard about you. He speaks fondly of you and Zeke and Uriah."

Amar looked at me and smiled, "Well he speaks fondly of you as well, Tris. It is nice to finally meet you."

I knew he not only meant this version of the woman but every version. He had never really met any of them. This was yet another difference in our interactions. I was no longer attempting to keep her to myself. She met my closest confidant and friend. Our interactions were pure and innocent, and our connection real.

"Well, I suppose I should return home to gather some things before going to my brother's house. I wouldn't want him to arrive here for no reason when he could be helping others. Will the two of you be alright?"

"I believe so. We live just north of the city and we spent the morning preparing our home as well," I explained. As much as I didn't want to let her go, I knew I had to. I couldn't hold her here and put her in harm's way. She had to prepare.

Moving closer to her, but not touching I smiled down to her. "Please be careful Tris. Take care of yourself. I would hate to lose you when I only just found you."

Her face flushed and before I could back away from her, she touched my hand gently. It was just a small touch, but I felt it deep down in my soul. The connection was stronger than ever before. But that touch terrified me. I had kept my distance. I hadn't initiated any contact, nor had I allowed her to either. But she moved before I could react and now I worried that with that contact I sealed her fate. Would she survive the storm or would something horrific happen like in the past for me to lose her. All I knew was, this time I couldn't be with her to witness what was to come.


	22. The Becoming 2

Chapter 22

The Becoming

Hurricane Katrina turned out to be one of the worst storms to hit America in history. The extensive damage to New Orleans and other cities throughout Louisiana and Mississippi was horrific. Most neighborhoods south of the city were leveled by flood waters. The protective levees had failed, allowing flood waters to destroy everything. Being north of the city, our home received some damage, but nothing like in the south. After the storm subsided, people began to return to their homes and their neighborhoods. But for many there was nothing to return to.

For weeks I worried for Tris. She hadn't returned to her store, so I had no idea what had happened to her or where she could be. I feared the worst. She had touched me. Our connection was felt in that one small touch, but it might have Been enough to seal her fate.

We kept busy trying to fix the problems with our house and staying away from others as much as we could. Unfortunately for the humans, they were suddenly very easy prey for us. We used their misfortune to our benefit. This was the way of predator and prey. The predator always picks off the easy prey first, and that was exactly what we did. The storm turned out to be quite advantageous for us. But still, the only thing I thought about was Tris.

Three weeks passed before I saw any indication of how she was. At dawn one morning, I walked toward her shop and noticed the wood had been removed from the door. I had returned just after the storm to sure up everything to prevent looters from ransacking her business. Many stores in the area received heavy losses from the storm and the subsequent looting. But I made sure Tris's store was safe. It was the only thing I could do to make sure she was safe. But it did nothing to stop my worry.

That night, when I found the door uncovered, I had hoped to see her sitting at her sewing machine creating some new and extraordinary article of clothing. The electricity in the area had only recently been restored, so my hope was that she would attempt to go back to her life. Instead of finding Tris, I only found a dark room. It seemed that most of her things were moved around, but nothing seemed to be destroyed. My only hope was that she decided to work from home for a while.

I walked my usual route to our home in the early morning hours of mid-September. The warmth of summer starting to give way to the cooler fall temperatures. It's nothing like the changes that we witnessed during this time of year in the north, but the temperature change was welcomed. I worried for Tris daily, I wished I had tried to find out more personal information about her when I had the chance. If I could just know that she was okay and that she survived the storm unharmed I would be able to relax. But my mind wandered as I loped down the street heading out of the city. I barely registered what was around me. This trek was so automatic, that I hardly had to notice where I was. I was never met with any humans during this hour, especially now. No one was vacationing to New Orleans. No one was relaxing and partying or having a good time. People were sad and barely making efforts to fix what was once theirs.

September gave way to October and I still had no sighting of Tris. I feared the worst for her. I knew that our slight contact just before the storm would make her vulnerable. I knew that Amar believed that the Original's loyalty to the goddess of the moon didn't transfer to his children, but now I wondered if we were. Maybe every curse, gift, and allegiance that he forged belonged to the rest of us as well. We were doomed creatures with no assurance that our future would be anything more than what we already had. But I had to believe that I was wrong. I had to believe that Amar knew better, his many years living this life had taught him far more than I had learned.

I think what worried me the most about Tris's disappearance was the fact that I couldn't feel any imprints of her anywhere in the square, other than at her shop. It was like her life hadn't really touched anything or anyone there. But her life had touched me and I worried about not being able to feel or see her at all. Over a month after the storm and I still didn't see Tris and the link that I was feeling that drew me back to America and to New Orleans was dim. I could only speculate on her whereabouts but I had hoped that the dim connection was simply because her brother lived further away than I might have realized.

Night after night I made my rounds. Amar and I hunted. It was more difficult because of the huge number of people that were displaced from the storm. There were whole neighborhoods that were destroyed, possibly never to be rebuilt again. The influx of tourists was gone also, so we had to go further to hunt. The distraction and chance to get away from the city was welcome though. Traveling helped me to distract my mind from Tris. Sometimes I wished I would have kept to what I said before and stayed away from here. I could have avoided all of this and perhaps whatever had happened to her wouldn't have happened.

"You can never know that," Amar said. I looked at him confused for a moment. Had he been reading my thoughts or had I inadvertently projected what I was thinking? "I could see you were deep in thought. I took a peak to see if you were distracted enough to let me in, and you were. You are frequently distracted these days."

"What do you mean I could never know that?" I asked. I didn't care that he was reading my thoughts, I just wanted to understand what he meant. I took in all that was Amar in that moment. It always amazed me to look upon his ancient beauty. He almost looked comical in modern clothing, the style didn't fit his ancient aura.

"That by staying away you could have saved her, if she is indeed gone. You don't know if she is or not, only time will tell. I truly do not believe the touch has anything to do with you and Beatrice. As we have discussed before, the decisions that we make, that our caregiver made on our behalf, mold who we are and who we become. Trice and Ricci both had poor caregivers and then neither of them seemed to make very good choices for themselves. That is not something you can take blame for. However the problems that you caused because of your manipulation and mind games are your responsibility. But you are doing things differently this time."

"Yes, but what if none of it matters. What if I have already lost her? I don't want to continue to find her only to lose her every twenty years for an eternity. I just want this to stop."

"It may never stop. You must know that. Even if she were to die of natural causes in her old age, that doesn't mean that she won't come back for you again."

I sighed, I didn't know what to do anymore. I also had nothing more to say, no arguments for my ancient friend. His wisdom exceeded my own and I had to hope that he was correct. Perhaps our slow and easy connection would be what made the difference this time.

~oOo~

Night after night we hunted. Night after night I wondered what had happened to Tris. It was as if she had disappeared completely. Slowly the French Quarter and the businesses that surrounded the area were rebuilt. Many neighborhoods south of town were still destroyed, but the people of New Orleans were resilient and acclimating to their new reality easily. But Tris's little shop still remained silent and dark. No new clothing graced the window, no sign of her through imprints or otherwise graced the streets. I feared the worst for her. So night after night, just before dawn, I walked the streets of the French Quarter hoping to finally see something that would tell me of her fate.

Suddenly from behind I heard the sound of a heartbeat nearby, but it wasn't a human heartbeat. I heard the sound of a vampire's fluttering heartbeat. It was a rare sound that I hadn't noticed in another since I felt my own. Somehow, I was aware of this creature's unnatural heart. There were no humans around at this hour, they were rarely active before dawn. So it made little sense that a vampire would be out just before dawn.

Then along with the presence of the heartbeat I felt a familiar pull. It was almost painful to feel her presence near me. I had feared for her for so long, that I didn't know if I could turn around. What if this was nothing but dream. What if I turned and she would not be there. Or what if I reached for her and she turned to dust or smoke. I couldn't live with that possibility. For almost two months I have worried for her and now she was here. But I couldn't turn around. I heard no human heartbeat. What happened to her?

"Tobias, I know you hear me behind you," her soft melodic voice sounded from behind me. "Why will you not acknowledge my presence, it has been so long since we saw one another."

Her voice was like a dream. I wanted to turn to her, but I was afraid. I didn't think I could see her only to lose her again. And I didn't understand what was happening. Had she been turned?

"Tobias, please. I need you to turn around. I need you to see me, I promise I won't turn to smoke or dust. I know what you are thinking. I can hear your thoughts."

What? How could she hear my thoughts? What was this? I didn't understand her words. I stopped walking abruptly and she was right behind me. She wasn't touching me, but I could feel every inch of her near me. Then her hand landed on my shoulder and the contact sent my senses into overdrive. But I still couldn't turn around. I didn't want to see what happened to her.

"How?" the word came out as nothing more than a whisper. But the strained sound carried in the silent morning.

"I can explain it to you. But first, we need to get off of the streets. I cannot be out in the sunlight. I am not strong like you. It will kill me."

Finally I whipped around and looked upon her. She looked exactly the same. The same expressive violet eyes, the same beautiful, perfect face and body. She took my hand in hers and pulled me along the street toward my home. How she knew where I lived, I didn't know. I was afraid to enter her mind. I didn't want to see what had happened to her.

We arrived in the home I shared with Amar only moments before the sun crested the horizon. Even though we were safely in the house, Tris still didn't release my hand. Her cold inhuman hands felt warm in my grasp. I didn't think I could ever release her.

"What happened to you? Who did this?" I asked after several moments of staring at our linked hands.

She pulled us to a couch where we could sit and talk. I felt more in that moment than I had in centuries.

"During the storm, I was hurt pretty bad," she started. "The storm had damaged my brother's home and we were doing everything we could to secure everything to keep his children safe. The wind tore some of the wood from a few of the windows and we were doing our best to secure the openings when my brother's five year old son came running into the room. I grabbed him just as a tree limb flew through the opening. It struck me in the back of head. Apparently after that my brother and sister-in-law did everything they could for me until the storm subsided. Until they could get me to a hospital. I was in the hospital for a long time recovering. That is where your friend found me."

"My friend?" I asked, finally looking at her closely. She didn't look different, but I could feel the difference.

She nodded, her sparkling violet eyes boring into me. "Amar. He explained your dilemma. He explained about the past lives and the reincarnation. He explained about the original Amar and Selena and their connection. And he explained that he believed that you and I were their second chance to be together in the flesh."

"He never told me that before," I said dumbfounded. "What does he mean?"

"I mean," Amar said entering the room, "that I believe that you have a chance at what I could never have. I still have my Selena every night when she shines her light down on me. I still feel her presence, but I never had her physical comforts that I desired so. I was loyal to the goddess Artemis, and I always would be. But you did not make that pact, I did. You deserve to have your Beatrice as I never got my Selena. I do not regret my life in this world. But I will not allow my child to suffer my fate. You finally deserve to have her. You deserve each other. You have both evolved and finally deserve to be together."

I couldn't speak. He really was the same Amar from the story. The original vampire, the first. How did I come to be in the presence of such an astonishing creature? How did I deserve such a connection to our ancient past?

"Because you have always been true, Tobias. Your strength drew me to you, but it was your loyalty to those who were loyal to you that anchored us together. Selena has been watching you since you were born. Your mother was set to be the next Oracle of Delphi until your father took her and forced himself on her. But Selena still watched your mother because she was an innocent. She could see the world clearly. When your mother was with child, Selena blessed her with a healthy pregnancy and she blessed the child with the same gifts his mother held. She never imagined that your fate would bring you to me, but it has been for the best. You father would have broken you eventually, just like he broke so many others in his wake."

I couldn't believe the outlandish story that Amar was telling us, yet I knew the story to be true. I felt it deep within myself. For the first time I understood why my life had taken this turn. I would never be alone again because I had my Beatrice and I had my father, my true father by my side, and I had both of my mothers to watch over me. One from the heavens and one in the moon beams.

I still didn't know if I believed in destiny. I didn't know of gods or goddesses, but I knew loyalty and truth and affection. I could hold on to the tangible and live my life with Beatrice and Amar for an eternity.


	23. Epilogue

Chapter 23

Epilogue

2014

Soon after the revelations that changed the course of my life were revealed, the three of us left New Orleans. I had my Beatrice, finally. The century of heart break, sadness, and desolation were finally past. I knew better than most that we weren't guaranteed forever. Eternity was a long time and only the most zealous and robust relationship would last. Amar and Selena may not have a relationship in the physical sense, but their affection for one another could be felt through our connection to the night and to the moon.

After we left New Orleans for good, we decided to return to Italy. I wanted to show Tris everything that our lives had to offer. The strength in companionship with those you trusted and the feeling of belonging, truly belonging somewhere. She was eager to learn and explore this new life with me. She was happy and never seemed to regret her decision to give her life to be with me. Much like Selena, she never looked back. She gave her life willingly for something more.

Our story would never be complete. Our lives were eternal and the night beckoned to us. We worshipped the goddess Artemis by being loyal to the night and we reaped the benefits of her gifts through the hunt. I still knew nothing of gods and goddesses, I knew nothing of destiny or fate, but I knew the faith I had in Amar and Tris and I knew the loyalty I felt from my comrades. Our story would go on, just like the moon would go on. And on the day that our Selena stopped shining down on us, that would be the day that our story would finally end.

* * *

><p>AN<p>

Thank you for reading my story, I hope you enjoyed it. If you did, please remember that this story is a original novel available on Amazon, Kobo, and Barns & Noble.


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